Dealing with anxiety/health anxiety.

[itsokayem]

TLDR: my health anxiety is taking control of my life and I hate it so much.

I guess I’ll start with how I’ve always had anxiety and depression really, growing up and I used to be able to deal with it the best I could, (minus a few times I tried to off myself when I was a teen) but now I’m 23, and I’m about to move out of my family home. Things are changing and they have been for a long time; my uncle died a year ago in November, from throat cancer, I didn’t really have all that much of a connection with him but once he died it was like I couldn’t stop constantly checking my neck in case I felt a lump. I sort of moved passed it and I was okay for a while until a family friend passed away from bowel issues and then came the self checkings again. The stop-breathing-to-hear-my-heart-beatings again, I don’t think it really clicked that this was health anxiety until I started to constantly check my heart rate, kept thinking it was beating too fast or too slow. And I’ve been trying to help myself by relaxing and thinking about other things but there’s always the lingering feeling in the back of my mind of ‘what if I’m about to die?’ What if this tingling feeling that’s in my hands is a sign of a heart attack or what if the dizziness I’ve been getting is a sign of low iron that could mean I’m internally bleeding. 
 

it’s this constant thinking that I’m going to die or have a heart attack or stroke that keeps me up all night and constantly checking my pulse. 
I don’t like this feeling, I’ve tried upping my heart medication to what I originally started with but they just lower my heart rate even more and it scares me so much and I don’t know what to do about it. 
 

i don’t know who I’m writing this for, maybe myself, and I don’t know who can help me but I guess if anyone else is experiencing the same then now you know you’re not alone. 

[Bob_22]

Hi itsokayem,

Welcome to the forums and thank you for posting your story here. I'm sorry to hear that you've been struggling with health anxiety it seems for a while now and about the passings in your family. Grief affects us in different ways and anxiety is a common manifestation. 

As you pointed out, you are certainly not alone in your health anxiety. It is unfortunately quite common, especially those who recently lost a loved one to a medical condition. I myself, recently lost a loved one to lung cancer and can't shake the feeling that I might be developing a tumour in my lung either. It's something I can manage but I can't sometimes help wanting to discuss the possibility with my GP. I used to also get shoulder pain and shortness of breath as a result of health anxiety to the point that I ended up in ED once. The mind has a phenomenal effect on the body when its under stress. My doctor referred me to a self help program on thiswayup.org.au which had six modules to work through based on CBT. They seemed to help me quite a lot in combination with medication. https://thiswayup.org.au/programs/health-anxiety-program/ 

I also found some basic information on health anxiety and some of the ways we might combat it here: https://www.cci.health.wa.gov.au/Resources/Looking-After-Yourself/Health-Anxiety 

I probably wouldn't recommend changing your medication on your own (especially heart medication). It would be best to talk about your anxiety with your GP or a psychologist. GP's are generally quite aware of this syndrome as well. They can also look into your heart issues in case something else is going on. I know I had a holter monitor just in case but it wasn't necessary for me.  Regardless, health anxiety is definitely something that can be managed with a little practice and support.

I hope this helps a little bit. Thanks for posting and letting others know they're not alone. Please keep us updated on how you're going and my condolences to you and your family again. 💙

Bob

[sbella02]

ItsOkayEm,

Thank you so much for sharing your story with us, I echo Bob's welcome to our forums. I'm so sorry to hear about your uncle's passing, and the passing of your family friend. Your health anxiety that has ensued following these two tragic events makes sense, and from what I understand, it is causing you a lot of distress in your everyday life. 

As Bob has suggested, it may be useful to have a chat with your GP but also to a psychologist. Their professional advice may help you come to a conclusion about the underlying causes of your health anxiety and how you may be able to alleviate this and the accompanying discomfort. 

Have you confided in any of your loved ones about your feelings? It may also help to hear the words of advice and comfort from those around you, as they may also have greater insight into your circumstances.

My condolences again with regards to your uncle and family friend. Sending you and your family all my best wishes.

Take care, SB