Changing Jobs

[smallwolf]

I am in the middle of changing jobs - going from a P/T position to a F/T one. The new job starts next week. I am actually looking forward to that. It is the handover that makes me has worrying like crazy. At the moment there is nobody to replace me. And today, I was made (?) to feel bad because of lack of holidays I took in the time I was in the P/T position. That I was in the wrong. I wish that I was not feeling guilty about this. My "manager" was very testy in the meeting ... which by the way was impromptu, and because this was my last week. Anyway, sometime after the meeting was over, I was chatting with a couple of others in the "meeting" and one apologised to me, and the other told me about other things that would be on the manager's mind. None of this is any excuse I feel, and feel as though I am just the punching bad and in the wrong place at the wrong time. And then there were some other things said that made me question my worth....

I thought that if I wrote this down, things would get a little easier in my head.

In reality, this is just the continuation of what is turning out to be a crappy year! And renews my cynicism about people!

[Ggrand]

Dear Smallwolf,

I’m sorry your manager made you feel guilty, It was nice that, that person apologised to you for what was said at the meeting, your new* boss sounds like an un compassionate person and shouldn’t be in the position he holds….every manager should be uplifting to their employees, encouraging them and helping them in anyway they can, to set an example for their workers on how people should be treated and spoken to….I’m sorry he made you feel guilty…please try hard to not feel that way…you did or/and have done nothing wrong…

Remember Smallwolf, you can only do your best…if you’ve been promoted to F/T work, you are definitely doing things right…eventually someone will be hired to take on the position that has been left vacant from you….please try hard to not stress over that, if your old position needs filling and it’s a necessity to the company you work for to employ someone to do it, they will…

I am sure you’ll do great in your new F/T job….I’m sure your manager thinks so as well……otherwise they wouldn’t have asked you to do it…

Kind thoughts Smallwolf..

Grandy..

[tranzcrybe]

Often when there is the prospect of advancement/change, we can feel undeserving and overlay guilt in 'letting others down' (or deserting them, leaving them behind) as such a relationship takes on implications of an 'understanding' or loyalty through familiarity.

No doubt, losing an employee (if only to a different department/classification) is hard to take for all needing to accommodate change, but professionalism dictates that one must remain gracious and encouraging of individual discernment. Sadly, an attribute found wanting in your manager on this occasion.

It would also appear that your negativity stemmed from the type of year you have had prior to this point which may explain heightened sensitivity to such comments in conjunction with apprehension for your new role.
What went before has no bearing on what is to follow (unless you deem it so!), so rule a line under it and embrace the positive aspects of change.

Cynicism has a tendency of taking root to block the more endearing qualities in people.

[smallwolf]

Thanks for your perspective tranzcrybe... I guess it left or leaves a sour taste in your mouth. Also, I guess I had expected better from this person.

[tranzcrybe]

Well I'm sure you've heard the saying:

     "Gracious are those who expect nothing...
      for they shall not be disappointed."

I hope they at least gave you a farewell party on your last day?
If not, be sure to celebrate your achievements and elevation to the new position to mark the occasion.

[smallwolf]

I did get a couple of gifts.

I had an appointment with my psychologist today ... we spoke about last week and this one, and she said I looked a lot happier now. Fingers crossed.