Burnout and returning to work. Heart palpitations

[Wanti]

I have worked in the community development I sector for the same company for the past 12 years. I hold a senior position And over the past two years have started to be quite depressed. A few things came to a head a few weeks ago which lead to me taking two weeks stress leave. Today was my first day back and I have had heart palpitations again throughout the day. My colleague/manager did not ask how I am going. Despite telling the directors I am burnt out and need to take leave however despite saying this verbally about five times they still haven’t listened

I am committed to the company and people I work for however the toll is now too much. I am the main breadwinner of the family and my husband has been depressed for close to 9 months and has not worked. My kids are doing ok but need a present mum which I am not I am short tempered and over it all

I know I have to leave but how? I feel trapped. I feel like I can’t keep this up but I have to

[Sophie_M]

Hi Wanti,
Thank you for being a part of the Beyond Blue community and for reaching out tonight. Welcome to the community and we hope you can find the support you are looking for here. We hear you when you talk about feeling trapped and how much this is taking a toll on you. Burnout is an awful experience for anyone.
 
Since you are finding the support from your organization lacking, what supports do you have outside of work?
 
What has been helpful with your anxiety and burnout so far?
 
If you are interested, here is a previous thread discussing burnout that you may find helpful:
https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/online-forums/anxiety/serious-burnout---what-worked-for-yo...
 
If you would like to talk to someone about your burnout, we would recommend that you get in contact with the Beyond Blue Support Service. They are available 24/7 by phone on 1300 22 4636 or on Webchat 1pm-12am AEST on our website: www.beyondblue.org.au/getsupport  One of our friendly counsellors will be able to talk through these feelings with you and can offer support, advice and referrals.
 
Welcome again and please feel free to keep us updated as to how you are going in future.

[smallwolf]

Hello there and welcome to the beyond blue forums. Sorry to hear about how you are feeling with work - feeling trapped as you are the main bread winner as mentioned.

I am not sure if I was burnt out or close to it. I had leave from work and then a gradual return with the help of a psychologist and psychiatrist. I would dread going to work. Opening email would make my heart race, my hands sweat etc. No matter how hard I tried it was never enough. And little support.

So I wonder what is missing for you at work? Can you stay there and do something else? Are there similar jobs elsewhere?

In one conversation with mum, she suggested I get a job at Bunnings while I got my life sorted out. Put it this way it would be far less stressful than what I was doing in IT.

What got you into this position or feeling? Please know I am listening to you