Bipolar partner anxiety

[Sophiebeth]

I’m hoping there might be some help from other partners of bipolar out there?? I always suffer really bad anxiety when my partner is on his high. He is having his ‘best life’ and I’m having my worst. 

He doesn’t seem to notice his arrogance, his loss of compassion, rebellious, is never home and becomes extremely selfish to the point that I feel extremely alone and unloved; only to then change (he is seasonal!) in the winter and become his beautiful loving self again. 

I just find it so hard and feel like I’m living with two different people. I love him to bits but don’t know how I can keep this up forever. We’ve been together three years now. 

Are there others out there who have come out the side of this? And how?? 

[quirkywords]

I have bipolar but can understand how frustrating it is for a partner. 
i wonder is he on medication and does he acknowledge he has bipolar.

i was in denial for several years . It was not until I was honest that I became aware of

how my highs affected others.

I wonder what he is like when he is depressed. You said he returns to his kind loving self so I assume that is when he is stable.

can you talk to him when he is stable. 
Only when I saw my highs were more destructive than my lows could I work out ways to limit their intensity.

I hope partners will post here and give you support. 
Everyone experiences bipolar differently.m

please make sure you remain healthy and get support. 
Black dog institute has a helpful website with information for people living with someone with bipolar.

[Sophiebeth]

Thanks for your reply quirkywords.

he was diagnosed 25 years ago.. and is very aware. We do talk about it also. But he actually really loves when he is in a high as he has more energy, he gets things done and is more social - as in party mode.. drinks a lot and starts smoking again, etc. When he is depressed, he sleeps a lot but is at home more and wants to be around me and his family. 
I guess a part of my struggle is the connection between us changes so dramatically with each up and down that I’m left to feel unwanted etc so it’s an emotional impact. As I’m am quick to anxiety myself that’s where it’s hard 🤷‍♀️ I guess I need to find some good strategies or gain more knowledge so that I don’t take it so personally. Just fine it really hard.