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Anxiety

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Chris_B Forums etiquette: give support to receive support
  • replies: 0

Hi everyone, particularly any new members who may be reading. From time to time, we get contacted by members who are unhappy that they haven’t received a lot of replies to their posts. Our community champions work very hard to make sure that all newb... View more

Hi everyone, particularly any new members who may be reading. From time to time, we get contacted by members who are unhappy that they haven’t received a lot of replies to their posts. Our community champions work very hard to make sure that all newbies are welcomed when they first post, and we understand that it’s a big step to post for the first time on a forum like this, especially if you aren’t feeling great. It’s important to remember, though, that these forums are a community of real people, just like you, not a one-on-one support environment like going to see your psychologist. To get the best out of being here, one of the best tips we can offer is give support to receive support. Being a good community member means: participating in different threads (not just your own), replying to people who have taken the time to reply to you (even if it’s just to say thank you), and... posting words of emotional support and encouragement when you see others who are hurting and reaching out. You don’t have to feel obliged to solve the problems of others: that’s not what we’re here for. But you can offer empathy and what you’ve learned from your own life experiences, even if it’s just a line or two, eg. “I don't know what to say, but I want to give you my support and tell you I care about what is happening to you and hope life will get better soon.” Try to develop an interest in the journeys of others here on the forums. You may be surprised at how good being an active, caring member here can make you feel. For those of you who have had good experiences giving support here on the forums, please post in this thread here and let us know how it has helped you on your journey.

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Alexander I think I am suffering anxiety
  • replies: 10

I am a middle aged male in a happy home environment. My youngest daughter last year experienced an event related to vomiting (a gear of) that led to her rapidly losing weight and displaying a range of really weird behaviours ranging from scratching h... View more

I am a middle aged male in a happy home environment. My youngest daughter last year experienced an event related to vomiting (a gear of) that led to her rapidly losing weight and displaying a range of really weird behaviours ranging from scratching her skin to saying she just wanted to die. This culminated in her being admitted to hospital to be refed via a naso gastric tube. Since then she has gained weight but there are still a whole range of anxious behaviours continuing. At the start of the school year she has made it very difficult for us to get her to school. She says she likes the school but comes up with many reasons why she can't go. This revolves around her stomach and the sick feelings she gets. We have been seeing a group therapy team since she left hospital which has been helpful but there still seems to be so much unresolved business. This experience has left me feeling very distressed and unsure what the future will bring. I work a high pressure job but I am now constantly worried about what the future looks like because I can't see past the problems we are currently experiencing. I feel I cannot be an effective father because I get unreasonable angry when my daughter won't conform to what I see as a normal behaviour such as getting up and going to school. I know we have to deal with this but in the meantime I feel like my usually strong character is dissolving me into an anxious person. I have seen a psychologist and occasionally take a half a relaxation tablet. I have lightened up my professional workload but I still feel vulnerable and as a result, I am worried what the future will bring

Mary1 Anxiety ruining my life please help
  • replies: 7

Hi all my General story is posted under "coping with Xmas" thread. I didn't intend to write about myself at all but rather support others. Yet reading through the stories of people living with anxiety, I felt strongly I needed to reach out. I suffer ... View more

Hi all my General story is posted under "coping with Xmas" thread. I didn't intend to write about myself at all but rather support others. Yet reading through the stories of people living with anxiety, I felt strongly I needed to reach out. I suffer from crippling anxiety. At worst which it is now I struggle to do anything I need to & can't bare leaving the house. My husband & 2 kids have a holiday planned from Wednesday & I'm extremely anxious about how I'm feeling & not wanting to affect their holiday with my anxiety. Yet we are going away up the north coast to a beachside suburb & I don't cope well with the heat or with being out of my normal routine. My biggest anxiety really will sound pathetic. My bedroom looks like someone's ransacked it & I have baskets & baskets of clothes to put away which is necessary to fix or I won't have any clothes to take. Yes it sounds so minor. But I keep putting it off & get overwhelmed by what I need to do to the pint I end up doing nothing. And I have irrational fears that people will judge me on our holiday & I feel so self conscious. This holiday is so important to my family as my husband has & continues to fight a life threatening illness. I feel weak, overwhelmed, struggling with an overload of thoughts, feeling unmotivated & out of control. I wake up anxious & spend days feeling so ill on stomach, constantly realising I'm not breathing propeley but rather holding my breathe too long. I feel like is someone made an unexpected noise I would jump through the roof. for me anxiety precedes depression. I get so wound up, full of self hate & hopelessness & then when I feel the anxiety is all pervading I then get depressed at my inability to cope & my sense of being overwhelmed. Today for example I woke in full anxiety mode struggling to breathe with my mind full of racing thoughts & then felt so so down at the impact this is having over my life. Why can't I simply deal with folding & putting away a ton of washing, why am I more anxious about people looking at me or stressing over what clothes to take rather than looking forward to being on hols with my family? Admittedley it's been one of the most difficult years of our lives. And without going into detail there are also a range of reasons why I feel burnout as well. i just need some support that I'm not being pathetic & how to get through this time given my mind is racing constantly & I just want to hide. Mary x

steviewonder87 feeling alone and unhappy with who i am
  • replies: 2

Hi all this is Steven here and I don't know what to do anymore. I feel like my happiness is slowly going away and all that is left is hurt and pain. Starting to be ashamed at the person I am. My aniexty that I have I thought I could mange and be alri... View more

Hi all this is Steven here and I don't know what to do anymore. I feel like my happiness is slowly going away and all that is left is hurt and pain. Starting to be ashamed at the person I am. My aniexty that I have I thought I could mange and be alright with but today something so simple happen that really hurt me and made me upset. To anyone who knows me they think it be silly but its not. I have been in a battle with this all my life but these last few years have been the best but this year as it comes to an end has been the worst year for me. I lost the love of my life. My first real relationship and I feel it was because of the person I am. From that my heart has been shattered and my happiness has not been the same. All I have now is this hurt and pain. I feel like my dream of wanting to get married and have family is never going to happen now. I am going to be alone rest of my life that's how it feels. Nothing I feel as much as I try and try as I have I still dealing with this and it a battle that I just don't know how to handle anymore. I don't want this anxiety anymore. I don't want to be shy and quit anymore. I want someone special to love me and who would want to build something special with. I want to be happy overall. Just don't know what to do anymore.

CarolynJ New Here and really need to vent.
  • replies: 7

Hello all, Sorry but I really need somewhere to vent before I go completely insane. I am subletting a room in my home to a lesbian couple (they have been here only 3 weeks) and they are already sending my anxiety off the charts. They were told No pet... View more

Hello all, Sorry but I really need somewhere to vent before I go completely insane. I am subletting a room in my home to a lesbian couple (they have been here only 3 weeks) and they are already sending my anxiety off the charts. They were told No pets and conned me into the dog staying (unless he caused a problem with my cats) I don't like dogs as they are noisy and messy and my Landlord doesn't like dogs either. They also brought their cat (which apparently was meant to live in their car) both animals are now occupying my outdoor entertaining area, along with Housemates boxes, bags, etc which they were told to store in the shed. They drink all of my milk (I have purchased 18 litres in the last 3 weeks compared to their 6 litres) I only use milk in coffee, have eaten a 4 ltr tub of ice cream, polished off a box of breakfast cereal that hadn't been opened, scratched 2 of my good non stick pans and asked for $60 off the rent last week so they wouldn't be short. I get home from work tonight and find out they have used my Xtra Virgin Olive oil mixed with vegetable oil to refill my deep fryer. They have their own bedroom and use of the bathroom and toilet (I have an ensuite) but they have suitcases in the bathtub so even if I wanted to use it I can't. I'm sick of them eating and drinking my food (they have bought some of their own and eaten all of that also) I have 2 fridges, I told them I cleared one out for them to use but they continue to use things from my fridge. I can't afford to kick them out at present but I don't know how much more I can take. I can't eat or sleep properly due to anxiety and stress caused by housemates, work and losing my License for 6 months because of a DUI (stupid mistake, 1 drink too many and followed an intoxicated friend home) I also have an undiagnosed medical issue which has been stressing me out for over 12 months. Specialist can't find a cause for muscle wastage in my right hand Thumb after numerous tests. I get the shakes, feel nauseous and have difficulty getting to sleep but wake before 6am. What can I do to try and calm my stress and anxiety, I don't want to go back on medication Thanks for any assistance.

Durras My First Support Group Meeting for Recovery HELP!
  • replies: 4

Hi all, I'm getting ready for my first support group meeting at Grow. I'm going by myself and feeling very nervous and anxious. I know I need this support and know it is vital for my recovery with depression and anxiety and also with my dependence on... View more

Hi all, I'm getting ready for my first support group meeting at Grow. I'm going by myself and feeling very nervous and anxious. I know I need this support and know it is vital for my recovery with depression and anxiety and also with my dependence on alcohol. I have been feeling strong since I first acknowledged myself with having depression on Monday, I found this website and the forums have been giving my a lot of help, I've ordered a book online Managing Depression with Mindfulness for Dummies and found this Grow support group but still I'm feeling really nervous about speaking out in person and letting everything out. Its safe to do it here on line but actually in front of people I'm really scared. I've never been comfortable around people unless I have alcohol in my system first. Anyone with some advice would be much appreciated. Thanks Durras

Chicken_Wings How do you do it?
  • replies: 3

I think I need a change in strategy because my anxiety is kicking my butt. i wake up every morning and it's there like a bad smell, lingering and unwanted. This is my current routine: wake up between 4:30 & 6am try relaxation breathing in bed to get ... View more

I think I need a change in strategy because my anxiety is kicking my butt. i wake up every morning and it's there like a bad smell, lingering and unwanted. This is my current routine: wake up between 4:30 & 6am try relaxation breathing in bed to get back to sleep get up and go to lounge, listen to guided meditation sessions Try to get a little more sleep on couch if I have time go for a quick walk force myself to get ready go to work I do all this and I still end up going to work really anxious. Sometimes on the way I even cry in the car.mon weekends I can take a little more time with it and the walk can be longer, but the results are the same. so I was wondering what sort of routine others have found helpful so I might try it.

ND1234 Relationship Anxiety
  • replies: 5

Hi everyoneI'm a first time poster on this site but I really wanted to get some advice.I'm a 28 year old guy and I've suffered from anxiety for most of my life. It started by manifesting as homesickness when I was a kid, then it turned in whatever el... View more

Hi everyoneI'm a first time poster on this site but I really wanted to get some advice.I'm a 28 year old guy and I've suffered from anxiety for most of my life. It started by manifesting as homesickness when I was a kid, then it turned in whatever else I couldn't be certain about.Now it has settled on my relationship. I've been with my girlfriend for 6 months, but we have really been together for a year (we met, got together and then she travelled for 6 months). She's wonderfully affectionate when we are together but she is also incredibly driven and has explained to me on numerous occasions that when she works, she has blinders on to the world. I've never been with a girl is this independent and someone who really does need their own space.The problem is, my anxiety has grabbed hold of every element of uncertainty about my relationship. My gf is having a very rough time at the moment as her job future is uncertain, she's living with her folks and she constantly fights with her Mum and one of her best friends just tried to harm himself (I don't know the details). But because she has become distant my anxiety has convinced me that there is something else wrong. We saw each other two weeks ago and it was amazing and incredibly affectionate. But the moment that changes I can't think about anything else! I can't eat, there is literally no food that I want and the thought of eating makes me feel sick.The only thing that takes the edge of is alcohol. I drink far to much, but it's the only thing that takes the edge of the anxiety. I am also on an antidepressant and I see a therapist, but I can't get these issues out of my head. To the point where if I sent her a message and she responded in a way that wasn't what I wanted, I freak out!I want to be able to focus on my own things and not have this anxiety keep me compulsively thinking about 'what if' there is a problem with my relationship.I would really appreciate any advice and support from you guys, I have found reading forums very helpful. If someone has had a similar experience, please let me know, I would love to talk about it.Thanks guysND

Manda85ballarat Fear of doctors
  • replies: 4

Hi I'm new to this forum, I have a totally irrational fear of going to the doctors. I have a phobia of needles due to a fainting incident 15 years ago. I have a spot I need to get checked and of course I am now jumping to the worst possible scenario.... View more

Hi I'm new to this forum, I have a totally irrational fear of going to the doctors. I have a phobia of needles due to a fainting incident 15 years ago. I have a spot I need to get checked and of course I am now jumping to the worst possible scenario. I guess I am just wondering how to get myself there as I am so scared not even my husband can get me there. what do I do?

Chicken_Wings Health Anxiety
  • replies: 10

I was just wondering for anyone who has experienced anxiety around their health, what can you do other than getting your brain scanned to convince you that you don't have a tumor, or getting fully tested to convince you that you aren't developing dem... View more

I was just wondering for anyone who has experienced anxiety around their health, what can you do other than getting your brain scanned to convince you that you don't have a tumor, or getting fully tested to convince you that you aren't developing dementia? I basically imagine the most extreme possible reason for something that I am experiencing and that's it, I'm convinced thats what I've got. Like at the moment, I'm noticing that my memory isn't as good as I'm expecting it to be, so therefore I must have something wrong with my brain. Or I noticed that I am more aware of my top lip than I normally am and just like that, I'm about to get mouth cancer.

thedeadlycake On How A Good Thing Can Lead to a Bad Place
  • replies: 3

This is a very tricksey trick of the anxious brain. You can start out full of inspiration and good intention and end up in full blown anxiety - the type that starts drifting really quickly towards depression. I've been spending more and more time thi... View more

This is a very tricksey trick of the anxious brain. You can start out full of inspiration and good intention and end up in full blown anxiety - the type that starts drifting really quickly towards depression. I've been spending more and more time thinking about what it is I really want to do with my life. I am really committed to the idea of helping other people who are similar to me make that first step in getting help and living a life that isn't dictated by their anxiety. I've been joining websites and forums and filling in volunteer application forms where ever I can find opportunities. Normally I would find an excuse not to do this but I have pushed through and done it anyway. The problem is that good intention is quite rapidly turning to frustration. I am yet to actually find something I can do. The ideas I have I am just not in a position to get out to an audience wider than my FB friends. I'm not in a position to make a difference at work. I've been listening to podcasts and reading about some really inspirational people who have made a real difference in their lives and I start to think I will never do this. My anxious brain tells me I am not good enough to do anything more with my life. Some of the people I've listened to have done great work from leadership roles. Something I can't see anyway of getting into again. Frustration makes me want to scream. I really feel like I could be doing good but I just don't know how. I am reaching out but not getting any answers. I've caught myself feeling like this and it is really interesting how quickly the anxious brain can turn inspiration and positivity into frustration. Almost as if it just wants to fuel anxiety and depression. Even as I write I realise I need to cultivate patience. I need to recognise the trickesy brain and have some faith in myself to find an opportunity. The brain is trying to make me frustrated so I will just give up. But I won't let it. Mindfulness can be like a super power but at the moment I think mine is less trained than it could be. I was quite far into this particular piece of suffering before I recognised it for what it is. It's is interesting that at the moment the default mode of my brain is to lean towards anxiety and depression. Self-sabotaging even good intention and positivity. I hope with more engagement in more formal mindful practice I can really begin the process of rewiring my brain to the point where the default mode is positive!