Anxiety

Work and life - shrouded by anxiety

replies: 3

Hello everyone. This is my first time posting - feeling particularly emotional, tired and raw at the moment, so thought it a good time to post. Some background about me - I'm 28, and have suffered from depression and anxiety for the majority of my li... View more

Hello everyone. This is my first time posting - feeling particularly emotional, tired and raw at the moment, so thought it a good time to post. Some background about me - I'm 28, and have suffered from depression and anxiety for the majority of my life. I experienced some childhood trauma which left me depressed in my adolescence and early twenties. Anxiety was intermittent during these times, and came in full blown after 24 I'd say. I would describe myself as being a high functioning anxious person, and I managed it fairly well up until I was 26. I began full-time work after graduating at 25, and fairly quickly was promoted and secured several new roles at the same company. I moved into one role that I really liked, however my Manager at the time did not fully understand the nature of my anxiety, or had any empathy or consideration for that matter, which became evident after a few instances at work. This role was temporary, and when I interviewed to be in the role permanently, despite being in the role for over a year, having my contract extended twice, and having great feedback, I did not get the role. Through the 'grapevine' afterwards (totally in breach of Staff code of conduct) I found out it was due to me taking too much leave (mind you, it was within the amount I was entitled to as a full-time staff member). I was devastated. I left the company shortly after. Fast forward now, having moved into a new role where I am in a management position, and I feel like an anxious wreck. There is so much stigma around taking a 'mental health day' for me, in my head. My new role is highly stressful, and I am overwhelmed. I am already burnt out, and just feel as though I am hopeless. I desperately worry I am about to 'lose it' everyday. I feel dread about going to work, and I don't think I am capable in the role. I have received no feedback to the contrary, however, anxious minds breed deceit, don't they? I constantly worry about what my staff think of me, and if they think I am useful. I just feel I have been absolutely ruined by my last experience at my old company. It plays in my mind constantly, and I feel so much pressure to perform at my new role. Add to this - my new role is not permanent, and I was given a week of training and then left to my own devices essentially. I panic every day about going to work. If anything, I needed to just vent all this. However, if any of you have have experienced anything similar, or are struggling at work. Please post.

Panic & vommiting

replies: 3

Does anyone else have a fear of vomiting? Everytime I have a panic attack I vomit constantly and the nausea feeling and the vommiting is the worst experience! I am not sure if my increased dosage is having side effects or my anxiety is playing up but... View more

Does anyone else have a fear of vomiting? Everytime I have a panic attack I vomit constantly and the nausea feeling and the vommiting is the worst experience! I am not sure if my increased dosage is having side effects or my anxiety is playing up but I haven’t had panic or vomited yet but the over thinking about it is killing me and is also causing me stress and making me nauseous anyone got advice?

Feeling lost

replies: 6

I was walking along the beach and I felt like I was going to explode, I felt like I just wanted to start running far away and not stop. I felt like I was going to burst at any second, and I was trying to hold back tears. I had wound myself up through... View more

I was walking along the beach and I felt like I was going to explode, I felt like I just wanted to start running far away and not stop. I felt like I was going to burst at any second, and I was trying to hold back tears. I had wound myself up throughout the day, my printer wasn’t working, my assignment was stuffing up, my tv wasn’t working and a lot of little annoyances put together had slowly brought me to a point of feeling agitated and overwhelmed like I was going to snap. When I sat on the beach I felt hopeless and lost, I felt like I should have every reason to be happy right now yet why wasn’t I ? I could feel tears coming out and I felt like giving up on everything for a moment, I wondered to myself what the point of my life was and if I will ever feel like myself or normal again, what’s the point of continuing if I am going to keep feeling this horrible sometimes. I felt like there was a knot inside me and it was getting tighter and tighter, I felt hot and dizzy and my vision was surreal around me. I don’t know if this is my anxiety or depression, I feel like I keep taking 2 steps forward 1 step back

Decision making

replies: 1

Hi there I've always had trouble making decisions, I always like to put other people first and tend to analyse what would be best for them and make them happiest, which has led to me usually pushing the decision making on them so that they will be ha... View more

Hi there I've always had trouble making decisions, I always like to put other people first and tend to analyse what would be best for them and make them happiest, which has led to me usually pushing the decision making on them so that they will be happy. This has extended so that I'm often incapable of making decisions, even simple ones like what to have for lunch can have me stumped all morning as I think about how much money I'm willing to spend on lunch and what the most convenient place is etc. Recently it's becoming a problem with my boyfriend. I do my usual thing of letting him make most of the decisions because if he leaves it up to me I'm worried that I'll choose something that will not make him happy, and in the end I don't really mind which decision is made. Its gotten to the point where he holds off decision making in case what he decides upsets me, because often I don't realise what I actually wanted until I start doing it. Is there any advice on how I can stop agonising over simple things like what to wear or where to go for dinner with friends and maybe start thinking about what decision I actually want? Thanks

anxiety

replies: 4

Hello my name is maria . I have just joined up recently to beyond blue. I would like to receive some support around anxiety but I would also like to help other people who are suffering from the condition.

Battling an Eating Disorder that I don't understand as well as Panic/Anxiety Disorder...I don't know what else I can try....

replies: 10

Hi all you beautiful Souls, this is my 1st post, I've kinda run out of options so I thought I would give this forum a try. Im a 30 year old female, who has suffered with some type of "eating disorder" since I was 3 years old. At the age of 14 I start... View more

Hi all you beautiful Souls, this is my 1st post, I've kinda run out of options so I thought I would give this forum a try. Im a 30 year old female, who has suffered with some type of "eating disorder" since I was 3 years old. At the age of 14 I started suffering from Depression, which has now lead to me battling with severe Panic/Anxiety Disorder for the past 5-6 years. I can't make sense of this eating disorder, I have been to 4 different therapists in the past 5 years, have tried Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, amongst other things, and NOTHING I do works. So, from the age of 3, one day I stopped eating meals. My family says that I just refused to eat pretty much every single food known. The only thing I would eat for dinner is hot chips, sandwiches/toast & certain fruits (and this still continues to this very day) I find it really hard to explain, because this is something I am so ashamed & embarrassed about. I try & hide this from anyone new I meet, & I strongly believe that the reason behind me developing Anxiety is because of the way I eat (I constantly fear death, think I'm having/will have a stroke or heart attack because of the way I eat) I know what you're probably thinking, How hard is it to put food into your mouth and simply swallow it? I have tried over and over again to try new food, especially healthy foods that I know are good for me. Everytime I do this, even if the portions are so minimal, I freeze up, I cry, I feel nauseous and am completely resistant to it. There has been a few instances where I would put a piece of carrot (example) in my mouth, chewed and eventually swallowed the food that's in my mouth but I cannot bring myself to have a second mouthful. I think the easiest way to describe it is that I have a phobia of food I guess?? I have a partner of 13 years, and I can cook he's food and be around the food, I just CANNOT put it in my mouth and eat like a normal person. My anxiety has stopped me from doing research online, because I can't even really describe my problem, so how can you find the answer right? This has already taken about 2 hours just to write this. I'm wondering if there is anyone out there who suffers or knows someone who suffers from something similar? Where there are very minimal types of food you will eat & even with those foods, you're still very fussy and particular about them? To anyone reading, I appreciate your time. I am so lost and confused, any advice would be so appreciated. Peace & Love

I don't know what to do anymore

replies: 2

I'm nervous and self conscious around people all the time. I feel like people are watching me and judging me. I worry that my hair is a mess, or something is on my face or i smell bad. I was always teased and bullied in school. My father was very abu... View more

I'm nervous and self conscious around people all the time. I feel like people are watching me and judging me. I worry that my hair is a mess, or something is on my face or i smell bad. I was always teased and bullied in school. My father was very abusive as well, mostly verbally. I seemed to start getting better in my last job. Over the course of about 2 years i started to feel less uncomfortable with customers and even started to hold conversations with them. however after about 2 years, business really started to pick up. Far more customers than usual. I was stuck on the over night shift on the weekends and sydney just started the lockout laws for bars. So people would get drunk at the local bar instead of going into the city. a bunch of drunk people would come in every saturday night and scream at me and hurl insults at me, etc. After 1.5 years of that I think that set me back far worse than when i started. I used to throw up almost every day in the shower and get panic attacks at work. Not all the time, but sometimes. I'd also be rather irratable even to the nicer customers at night. I dislike being around people even more now. I'm afraid someone is just going to snap and start screaming at me for no reason. I don't want to work in that kind of place anymore. But retail/hospitality is the only thing I'm really "qualified" for and as we live in a remote area it's the only thing that's really available to do anyway (because I really want to work in a bar after all that...) It's been over a year since i left that job but it's still affecting me. i don't know what to do anymore. I feel completely useless not having a job, but i just don't want to go back to work. And this is causing problems in our marriage, which is causing even more anxiety/depression. My wife and I had an arguement a couple days ago and I'm still unable to sleep well because of it. It takes hours to fall asleep. When i do fall asleep, i sleep for 12 hours or more. I have no appetite. I have to force myself to eat. It feels like everything is just falling apart. If she leaves me, I'm screwed. If the depression doesn't kill me, I'll probably be living out on the street. I have no one to help me. I left all of my support system behind when I moved to Australia. I don't even have her family to help me since we moved all the way out to the middle of nowhere. I'm going to make a doctor's appointment tomorrow to talk all this out if I can but I just needed to vent a bit.

I'm not sure my therapy is really working

replies: 1

I have had anxiety at varying degrees for many, many years. I have been on meds for about 13 years now and have finally given in to seeing a psychologist. She is getting me to do exercises that simulate a panic attack, such as fast breathing, heat an... View more

I have had anxiety at varying degrees for many, many years. I have been on meds for about 13 years now and have finally given in to seeing a psychologist. She is getting me to do exercises that simulate a panic attack, such as fast breathing, heat and chair spinning. The chair spinning is what I am concerned with. I do get panic symptoms like nausea, but the dizziness is horrendous and is not what I experience when I do have an attack. The dizziness lasts pretty well for the rest of the week, though less than originally. Should I insist that I not do this exercise? My main problem is my negative thoughts that will not go away when I have to go somewhere I have never been, or somewhere too far from home in my mind. Once the perceived threat is gone, my physical symptoms ease right off.

High School

replies: 5

Hi, My Name is Lily. I have been diagnosed with anxiety just before school started again, being diagnosed has affected me a lot, I have a loss of appetite, I need to fidget with things, I can't concentrate, I have seen the school counselor but he did... View more

Hi, My Name is Lily. I have been diagnosed with anxiety just before school started again, being diagnosed has affected me a lot, I have a loss of appetite, I need to fidget with things, I can't concentrate, I have seen the school counselor but he didn't really help much, I also went to my GP but she just told me that she couldn't really help me with that sort of stuff and told me a counselor would be better. I have no idea what to do. I have also talked to my parents but they don't understand. I did have one really close friend and I thought that we would still be close but as soon as I told her I had anxiety, she left and found new friends, now when I pass her in the halls she looks at, e like I'm contagious or something. Someone told me I should give this a go so, here we go.

Anxiety and Panic when looking for a new job

replies: 8

Hi everyone, I am brand new to this site and would like to share with you my hurdles with panic and anxiety. I have struggled with anxiety and panic attacks for the majority of my adult life in the beginning I was not able to eat out at restaurants a... View more

Hi everyone, I am brand new to this site and would like to share with you my hurdles with panic and anxiety. I have struggled with anxiety and panic attacks for the majority of my adult life in the beginning I was not able to eat out at restaurants and go out with my friends and have fun because I would have anxiety attacks whilst I was out and have to go home or go to the bathroom and make myself throw up. I have slowly learnt to overcome these hurdles and actually enjoy spending time with friends out and about but still have my odd moments. I have also struggled with travelling overseas and new experiences in the past but have pushed through with all my strength and manage to feel better by slowly desensitising myself to the new things that make me anxious. For example I had a real rough patch when I moved out of home for the first time with my partner The one thing I have not been able to overcome is the anxiety and panic I feel about starting a new job. This week I was told I would be made redundant at the end of next week. I have been working for the company for approximately 5 and half years so will receive a small payout that will keep me going for a month or so until I find something else but like most people I have a mortgage and bills and it's imperative I have an income. My husband also works and earns over the threshold for me to receive any payments from Centrelink. When I found out I would be made redundant my anxiety immediately returned at the thought of having to find work and start a new job. I tried to push past it and jumped on job websites looking for work. I applied for a few and heard back from one that I attended the interview for I am usually fine at interviews and perform really well and there was absolutely nothing wrong with the job, the hours suited me and the position was something I could of handled but after the interview I was contacted and informed they were doing reference checks and wanted me to come back and meet with one of the bosses I would be working under. It all became to real for me after that, the thought of starting a new job....the anxiety and worry started to roll in. The next day I struggled all day with the anxiety and was physically and mentally exhausted and broke down to my husband. He said to meet with them tomorrow and see how I felt after that. I hoped in my car to drive to the second interview got half way there and lost it. I had to pull over and just sat in my car crying that I wasn't able to go to the interview I felt like such a failure. Once I composed myself I was able to drive home and my husband was there and asked me what had happened, them the company called me to find out where I was and I just couldn't answer it. I later emailed them explaining I had second thoughts about the position and wished them luck in finding the right person. This all had happened yesterday. To give you some history I have started new jobs in the past and my anxiety and panic has been so terrible I haven't lasted more than 2 days in a role, my anxiety manifests as nausea and I am unable to eat anything so after a few days I am so physically and mentally tired I cant go on. This has happened a handful of times and takes me ages to get over. Now I am so scared this will happen again my anxiety begins before I even start the job just at the thought of being offered it sends me into a spiral of anxiety and worry. I know I have to find something eventually and have contacted Disability Support Employment Services to assist me in finding work however I am unsure if I am eligible for this service. It sucks that I found a job I felt comfortable in and have stayed there for 5 years and now have to start all over again. I want to work so bad and need to work for the income but the thought of having to start a new job sends me running in the other direction. I am thinking about upping my medication to help me get through this rough patch and have a meeting with my GP on Sunday about it. Thanks for listening and if anyone has any similar experiences or advice I would love to hear them just to know I'm not the only person out there like this.

Pinned discussions

Hi! Check out this post if you're not sure how to start

replies: 0

All discussions