Anxiety

Not really sure if this belongs here, but it does relate to anxiety

replies: 1

I have come to the realisation, that I need to be more proactive in my life. Mainly around my social circle. Looking back I now realise, the reason I behaved in such strange ways was because I was lonely. I just didn't really know it at the time, bec... View more

I have come to the realisation, that I need to be more proactive in my life. Mainly around my social circle. Looking back I now realise, the reason I behaved in such strange ways was because I was lonely. I just didn't really know it at the time, because I had nothing to compare it to. I have identified some groups I could reach out to, but my anxiety has prevented me from accessing them in the past. Anyway, wish me luck anyone who reads this, for the more religious of you; prayer for me.

Can I ever be free?

replies: 2

Where to start... So, I'm new here to the forums and live with intense anxiety and bouts of depression - a reality I'm only really starting to talk about and admit to myself and others. I am reaching out for support. I have experienced a traumatic fe... View more

Where to start... So, I'm new here to the forums and live with intense anxiety and bouts of depression - a reality I'm only really starting to talk about and admit to myself and others. I am reaching out for support. I have experienced a traumatic few months with my mental health with changing medications and working with the ACUTE mental health team to see what was best for me so I didn't have to go to hospital. I thought I may have had to go, though wanted to stay home in the environment I know. I am seeing psychologists, and going through a change with work. I feel like my my identity is completely rattled and unsure presently. You see, I get stuck. I get stuck in my thoughts and believe them to be the truth. I realise this isn't helpful though these thoughts and feelings totally consume me and I become lost. I am lost. Lost within the past or future or the worry, rahter than living in the present and taking every moment as it comes. I can break out of it sometimes, though it comes back. I want to be free of my negative thought patterns. To let go. To believe I am something. That I am worthy. I care so much about what others think of me. I project my own judgement onto others so it reaffirms my own judgements. Maybe people do judge me? But I don't want to care. This is so tricky... I don't want to end up in hosptial. Last week I really thought I might. I want my confidence back. I lost it somewhere a while ago and can't pinpoint how, when or where? Can I ever be free?

Newbie having panic attack

replies: 4

4.00am can't sleep the world is closing in on me. I am going to die if I sleep. Not afraid of dying afraid for my two children . I am at the age to die 69 , I know I can't live forever but what if I go to sleep and die my to disabled children would f... View more

4.00am can't sleep the world is closing in on me. I am going to die if I sleep. Not afraid of dying afraid for my two children . I am at the age to die 69 , I know I can't live forever but what if I go to sleep and die my to disabled children would find me. For the last month I have had 3 hours sleep per night.tonight 1 hour I feel so alone , my wife died 5 years ago I talk to no one no one to talk to .

Think I am fine then I am not

replies: 1

I have been bullied for over 13 months at my job. However I kept hanging in there I thought no matter what they haven’t told me or indicated I was doing a bad job so I will stick it out. I was first put in a role that I didn’t have experience in even... View more

I have been bullied for over 13 months at my job. However I kept hanging in there I thought no matter what they haven’t told me or indicated I was doing a bad job so I will stick it out. I was first put in a role that I didn’t have experience in even though they did a thorough recruiting process. I was employed under certain conditions. I accepted the job under those conditions. I was provided no training despite my numerous requests for help. My supervisor a contractor kept work for her self as she told me she wanted to please the manager and have a permanent position. I was told by the manager I was placed in this position due to the previous person suddenly leaving. I was placed under a different supervisor who belittled me, yelled at me constantly firstly in front of the team. I had witnesses who was willing to go to HR. My manager requested that I come to her instead of going to HR I wanted to please her. Over the 4 months working from home due to Covid my supervisor micro managed me constantly calling me and yelling at me. I went to the manager several times she always gave excuses for the supervisor behaviour. Later I realised they were both in it together. I had diary entries but no witnesses. Now I am suffering anxiety and panic disorder. Been out of work for5 months on antidepressants. I thought I was better but I realised I wasn’t I can’t do anywhere within 5km radius of my office I am on no pay leave. Senior mgt doesn’t believe me or doesn’t want to believe me as it’s easier to replace me than replacing the supervisor and manager. I am not the fiat employee they have done this to. Even when I talk about work I feel tears rolling down my chin. HR sees me as a trouble employee no one believes me. I have not been successful in finding another job and on no pay leave. i have been told that I should have done something about it before it got so bad. But I knew no one would believe me I thought if I did have a mental freak down there was a better chance someone would believe me but I was wrong. All these laws ,policy and procedures but when you actually need help there is nothing to help you. The bullies always always win.

Workplace anxiety - When good feedback hurts the most.

replies: 4

Recently I spotted a position being advertised in my workplace that seemed interesting. It followed some similar lines to my current role and I contacted my manager to discuss it. They were supportive and offered to review my write up for the express... View more

Recently I spotted a position being advertised in my workplace that seemed interesting. It followed some similar lines to my current role and I contacted my manager to discuss it. They were supportive and offered to review my write up for the expression of interest to help me polish the wording and upsell myself. I sent them the write up and after a day or so they responded with suggestions on what to change and possible things to include in the examples. I can read what they have sent and see how the suggestions would improve the write up, my manager has been clear and professional. The critique has picked up on what I could do to improve my wording and examples. Logically I should be able to progress, but emotionally I'm a wreck. I'm panicking about adding more because there isn't anything more I can truthfully add. The suggestions are valid, but I do not have any examples to cite to support the statements. So I'm feeling like a fraud, that my manager thinks too highly of me and thinks that I do more than actual output. If I submit the application as is, I probably wont get the role. If I embellish it feels like that will just be compounding lies and getting the position on falsehoods would just make it worse. If the feedback had been poor quality or too blasé, I could have laughed it off and submitted the application without a second thought. I have the flutter in my chest of panic, a dry mouth and shaking hands. The tidal wave of nerves is washing over me and my stomach is in knots. And now my manager has scheduled a meeting later today to discuss my application, I know they are trying to help but it has me reaching for the ejector seat. I had hoped that by writing it out here, the feelings might somehow get stuck in the little box on the screen. But they aren't. I'm clinging to a small slice of my brain that is still saying in a tiny voice that the feedback is good and I can do this.

I don’t know what to do (quite a drama Queen aren’t I😂)

replies: 6

I make these fake scenarios in my head. I become so invested in them I find myself forgetting where I am and who I am with. There is one I usually have where I lose my entire family at a young age and I do it purposely to cry and justify how sad I ca... View more

I make these fake scenarios in my head. I become so invested in them I find myself forgetting where I am and who I am with. There is one I usually have where I lose my entire family at a young age and I do it purposely to cry and justify how sad I can get. I also imagine be being widely successful at the things I do because I have never done that and I enjoy the feeling it gives me. I imagine how smart I can be or how pretty I am and I read somewhere that is might be anxiety but I don’t know.I use these scenarios to deal with issues that in my real life, I fail to deal with properly. I fail a test or say something stupid and these scenarios help be see what I could’ve done and for some reason they make it better. I was great for a while but every now and then the scenario breaks and I am back to reality. I lose it and it hurts. I don’t have those same feelings and I am just sad. It was my own world to escape and express myself and I lost it. I don’t know what I need. I am anxious all the time and I feel terrible all the time and these things where just the way I coped and now they’re gone and I don’t know what to do with myself.

Anxiety and COVID-19

replies: 18

We're you able to adapt to the changes during the lockdowns? What did you do to cope up? This has been a stressful year and there's just no sign of hope I guess. Everything's still crazy!

Should a mental health hospital be providing emotional support when needed for GAD?

replies: 2

Hi, After 8 weeks struggling with anxiety and depression (tears/tremors/nausea), my 75 y.o mother entered a mental health hospital yesterday on the advice of her GP. Although one day is too early to draw any conclusions, my mother has been finding th... View more

Hi, After 8 weeks struggling with anxiety and depression (tears/tremors/nausea), my 75 y.o mother entered a mental health hospital yesterday on the advice of her GP. Although one day is too early to draw any conclusions, my mother has been finding there's no staff for emotional support she can call on when she's crying and shaking bad and just needs to be comforted, be told things will be ok etc. At home she at least had emotional support from myself (came to stay with her over the last 6 weeks), and neighbours would constantly call in. She would do housework and potter in the garden distract herself - but all this is gone. With Covid, she's not allowed to leave the premises. Talking to other inpatients, they unaminously tell her about the lack of emotional support there compared to other places they have been. She's now very concerned. So I find myself in the position of not knowing if this is an intentional, cold-turkey, break dependence on others part of the therapy, or it's just not a good hospital for her.

Feeling anxious

replies: 4

Hello, Having a bit of an anxious day. I needed to get a massage today so searched carefully online for a nice place and chose one because they had an open (ie transparent glass) shop front, it seemed clean and they said they are COVID safe. i was ru... View more

Hello, Having a bit of an anxious day. I needed to get a massage today so searched carefully online for a nice place and chose one because they had an open (ie transparent glass) shop front, it seemed clean and they said they are COVID safe. i was running about two mins late and google maps said I had arrived and pointed to the parlour. I noticed the name was different and the whole window was not transparent (had pictures on it). Because I was late I didn't question it too much - I said I'm sorry for being late and asked if this is [abc] massage - the lady said yes and I asked have they got a new name and she said yes. She might not have understood me - English was not good. She didn't seem to understand I had made an appointment. The place was a little dingy and she did not wear a mask and when I asked to sign in for COVID at the end she didn't understand - I wrote my name and number on a post-it note. I didn't know what else to do. I feel fairly safe here in Melb with our low numbers but I got very anxious leaving. That was made worse when I drove away and down the rd about 100m I passed the correct place. I felt terrible for them. And it looks like a beautiful place. I noticed a missed call and called when i got home to explain - I don't think they understood vey well and said they waited a long time for me but thanked me for my call. I don't know why but I felt dirty and felt the need to scrub when I got home. Now I feel like I shouldn't see anyone for a few days? But then the rational me says masks are only required in a small list of places here now and there are so many close interactions we all have without masks now - eg beauty therapists, hairdressers, cafes, etc. and we can't isolate from society every time we do these things. And I did my bit to record my name and number and used hand sanitiser. I felt the same anxiety when I travelled my plane interstate and a person behind me had their mask hanging from one ear and continued to wipe their nose and sniff the whole flight - I didn't see any friends/family on my return until I knew I didn't get sick. This is exhausting if I do it every time, because the pandemic will go on for a while yet. I know I have given support to some people here about health anxiety, but I too occasionally fall into difficult times where for some reason my anxiety is OTT. i suppose I'm just looking for some opinions or reassurance.

I'm Falling Apart!

replies: 8

Hi all Yes me again. Going around in circles with my multiple symptoms that plague me night and day. Some history since August 2020. I had severe pain in chest and thoracic region. I had full bloods taken and xrays. All clear except I do have a herni... View more

Hi all Yes me again. Going around in circles with my multiple symptoms that plague me night and day. Some history since August 2020. I had severe pain in chest and thoracic region. I had full bloods taken and xrays. All clear except I do have a herniated disc in thoracic spine. Have been undergoing physio for that. That abated somewhat then in November I started having pain in my throat and ear. Since then I have seen three doctors; an oral surgeon and a dentist. Had a scan of lymph nodes; all clear. Had another full blood count; all clear. Doctor says I have TMJD, Glossopharyngeal neuralgia and 'health anxiety' (who wouldn't when one has so many symptoms?!). Nobody has given me any idea of what to do about this. The dentist said I have 'elongated styloid processes' which can cause Eagle Syndrome. The symptoms of which are what I am suffering from . To add to this I now have globus and a severe pain in neck. Going to chiropractor tomorrow and will ask GP for a ct scan as it feels like my neck is out of alignment; which too can cause all of these symptoms. Surely if there was something sinister the bloods or lymph scan would show something? I am in pain from my entire head to my mid back. Everything hurts! Ear, neck, throat, eyes, head, shoulders......I am also peri menopausal so I doubt that is helping me. Deep down I think my symptoms are worse due to the worry I feel all the time. Again; I am pursuing further tests to find out what is going on with my neck and styloid processes. I feel totally let down by the health care system. I am sure they just think I am a middle aged hypochondriac. My entire life is spent going to doctors, physio, acupuncture; trying to stay off google....it is driving me mad and my 'quality' of life is severely compromised. I guess I just wondered if others have had the same kind of situtation; where everyone seems to palm one off and one is expected to just get over it. Thanks for reading.

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