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Chris_B Forums etiquette: give support to receive support
  • replies: 0

Hi everyone, particularly any new members who may be reading. From time to time, we get contacted by members who are unhappy that they haven’t received a lot of replies to their posts. Our community champions work very hard to make sure that all newb... View more

Hi everyone, particularly any new members who may be reading. From time to time, we get contacted by members who are unhappy that they haven’t received a lot of replies to their posts. Our community champions work very hard to make sure that all newbies are welcomed when they first post, and we understand that it’s a big step to post for the first time on a forum like this, especially if you aren’t feeling great. It’s important to remember, though, that these forums are a community of real people, just like you, not a one-on-one support environment like going to see your psychologist. To get the best out of being here, one of the best tips we can offer is give support to receive support. Being a good community member means: participating in different threads (not just your own), replying to people who have taken the time to reply to you (even if it’s just to say thank you), and... posting words of emotional support and encouragement when you see others who are hurting and reaching out. You don’t have to feel obliged to solve the problems of others: that’s not what we’re here for. But you can offer empathy and what you’ve learned from your own life experiences, even if it’s just a line or two, eg. “I don't know what to say, but I want to give you my support and tell you I care about what is happening to you and hope life will get better soon.” Try to develop an interest in the journeys of others here on the forums. You may be surprised at how good being an active, caring member here can make you feel. For those of you who have had good experiences giving support here on the forums, please post in this thread here and let us know how it has helped you on your journey.

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LissyLou99 My son was destroyed online… and it’s me not coping
  • replies: 10

Hi friends My son, about a month ago, tried to take his own life at 17 years old as an ex girlfriend posted online that he was a sexual abuser. Of course initially our priority was to ensure he was safe and got him some help to keep him safe. Next we... View more

Hi friends My son, about a month ago, tried to take his own life at 17 years old as an ex girlfriend posted online that he was a sexual abuser. Of course initially our priority was to ensure he was safe and got him some help to keep him safe. Next we investigated the allegations and even took him to the police and asked for them to investigate it. Our reasons were 2 fold. If it was true or any basis for her allegations, then we needed our own son to be responsible for his actions. But if it was false, we want him to have a voice of reply and to have her dealt with. To at least remove the post that went to 300 of the school kids. The result was there was no basis for her post, it was posted out of jealousy to deter another female from liking my son, no charges were laid against my son, she was reprimanded and the post was removed. Unfortunately it made an awesome story for 17 years old that he goes to school with and although is still receiving a lot of help from professionals, is a risk every time he leaves the house of whether he will be able to keep himself safe. He is avoided at school as, although she keeps it off line, she verbally still spreads stories of him. The knock on effect is what this has done to our family. I can’t get it out of my mind. I turn over the events constantly. The anger is what she’s done to gain attention and to be portrayed as a “strong resilient survivor” flies in the face of every woman who has truely been assaulted. But I can’t seem to move on… i want to be the mature woman I used to be but I’m the middle of the night when I can’t sleep, the intrusive thoughts prevent a clear way through. I’m trying meditation to try to calm my mind and it does help. For a short time. I exercise every day but still doesn’t exhaust me enough. I don’t want to go to work but once I’m there, it does distract me. I’m hiding all these thoughts from my wonderful and supportive husband. I’m embarrassed that I’m not coping. He truely is CaptainSensible! But sometimes I just wish my mind would just stop.

Seekingbrighterpath Anxiety about the future
  • replies: 6

Hi Guys, I have just joined in order to seek help. I have 2 small children and all of a sudden I have started to suffer MAJOR anxiety about the future of the world. Not just normal feelings but feelings of Doom and gloom about coronavirus, AU/China U... View more

Hi Guys, I have just joined in order to seek help. I have 2 small children and all of a sudden I have started to suffer MAJOR anxiety about the future of the world. Not just normal feelings but feelings of Doom and gloom about coronavirus, AU/China US/CHina etc. What have people done to cope with this? I find myself reasoning to calm myself down but it seems to come back worse every few days to the point of major panic attacks.. why am I upset about things I can't control? Please help

Pureison I feel so anxious I want to cry
  • replies: 14

Hello there, I am 28 years old and recently received a job offer for a retail store that's opening up in my city soon. I went to meet the manager the other day, and I've already told a few of my friends that I got the job, however there's a couple of... View more

Hello there, I am 28 years old and recently received a job offer for a retail store that's opening up in my city soon. I went to meet the manager the other day, and I've already told a few of my friends that I got the job, however there's a couple of things that I'm really worried and stressed about and whenever I think about it, it makes me want to cry. The thing is, I've never had a job before due to personal reasons, and this is all so new to me, I have training in a couple of weeks time and meeting the team but I'm not sure if I can do this, and I've heard so many horror stories or stories about customer service and I don't think I'm suited for it... I'm not confident at all with meeting new people and at the moment I'm having second thoughts about this new job... I have no idea what to do. My friends all believe that it's great and I can do this but I just feel so stressed and feel like I don't think I can... I don't think I can even go to this training thing.... Does anyone have advice about this? Maybe share your experience with retail?

Kpb16 Excessive hand washing
  • replies: 2

Hi, hope all is well. I’ve been washing my hands excessively and I can spend 20-30 minutes doing so and it’s starting to hurt my legs and knees. I do need help please on how to stop. Thanks.

Hi, hope all is well. I’ve been washing my hands excessively and I can spend 20-30 minutes doing so and it’s starting to hurt my legs and knees. I do need help please on how to stop. Thanks.

I_wish_I_could_learn_by_o Don’t know how to ask for help, what I’m asking for...
  • replies: 7

Just not feeling like I can (should) reach out and ask for help. Read through some of the new posts but found it overwhelming and confusing. Not even sure WHAT I am asking for, have never really been able to ask for help, or have had unrealistic expe... View more

Just not feeling like I can (should) reach out and ask for help. Read through some of the new posts but found it overwhelming and confusing. Not even sure WHAT I am asking for, have never really been able to ask for help, or have had unrealistic expectations of what help means or looks like. Don’t want empty platitudes like “it will get better” because of course it will. A lot of anxiety exacerbated by being in lockdown and socially isolated, can’t remember how to hold a conversation, or maybe I just don’t care anymore? Now a single mum, over 40, DV situation which lost me the support of my family, intellectually disabled child, have psychologist and psychiatrist, on new meds with recent bipolar diagnoses. Anxiety, depression, maybe BPD or complex PTSD. Lost? Getting along okay. Not sure how to make connections with people and would like to learn how to converse with people and make friends and be friendly again.

Buzzybees101 Anxiety and throat symptoms
  • replies: 6

Hi everyone, I hope you are having a good day today. This is my first post. I have suffered from anxiety and sometimes depression for my whole life. Recently my anxiety has been 100x worse (since job loss earlier in the year and losing any sense of d... View more

Hi everyone, I hope you are having a good day today. This is my first post. I have suffered from anxiety and sometimes depression for my whole life. Recently my anxiety has been 100x worse (since job loss earlier in the year and losing any sense of direction). Today I dropped my FIFO partner at the airport to go to work and had a panic attack, crying, vomited, hyperventilating etc at the thought of spending time without him while he is gone. Since then I have been feeling like my throat is swollen even though I am able to breathe and swallow fine and of course my brain's rational response is a self diagnosis of thyroid cancer! I am terrified now (I made the mistake of googling it and google only ever tells us we have cancer). Has anybody else had similar symptoms with their throat? I want to book an appointment but I am worried I am going to sound silly explaining this to a doctor. Thank you for reading

Aussie.Girl Stressed about everything...
  • replies: 4

Hi, this is the first time I've actually posted here. I guess I just need somewhere to vent, but If I can get some advice too that would be great. Reasons I'm stressed... I have a horse who is currently agisted (which basically means I 'rent' a paddo... View more

Hi, this is the first time I've actually posted here. I guess I just need somewhere to vent, but If I can get some advice too that would be great. Reasons I'm stressed... I have a horse who is currently agisted (which basically means I 'rent' a paddock to keep him in). Unfortunately the property has been sold and I can't find anywhere suitable to move him to. I am honestly not being picky; I just want somewhere safe, reasonably close and not extremely expensive. Unfortunately most of the land nearby (within 1hr drive) is being developed so there aren't many places to choose from and most are $200+ a week. I'm in my early twenties and live with my family. We have to move house at some stage in the near future (for various reasons). I really don't want to move away from the house I've lived in my whole life, but at the same time I'd love to live somewhere I could have my horse at home. I'm currently in a lockdown area, and feel really guilty about being at home not doing anything 'productive'. Does anyone else constantly feel like you're 'running out of time' for no reason? Also regarding lockdown, I'm finding it a bit 'difficult' everyone being home constantly. Don't get me wrong; I love my family, but I share a room & with everyone at home there's nowhere I can go to get some alone time (I'm an introvert in case it wasn't obvious). I miss being able to have space to myself to read in silence or sing without disturbing anyone. The fact that everyone else in the household is stressed too (again for various reasons) doesn't exactly help. I don't have any friends (aside from pets and family). I mean this quite literally. I grew apart from my high school friends years ago and while I am on 'friendly' terms with my co-workers they are all significantly older than me so we just don't have that much in common. It usually doesn't bother me - again I'm being completely honest here, but sometimes I find there are things I'd like to do or talk about with friends and I can't. There are more examples, but it's not things I want to share. Thanks for reading this far & sorry if it comes across as just me complaining about everything. If you have any advice regarding the above, please let me know.

Sal559 Should I leave a great job over my anxiety?
  • replies: 7

I’m thinking of quitting a great job because I am so anxious and overwhelmed. I’ve only been there for a few months and I work with some super smart, caring people. But I can’t shake the anxiety and dread I feel every day going into work and having t... View more

I’m thinking of quitting a great job because I am so anxious and overwhelmed. I’ve only been there for a few months and I work with some super smart, caring people. But I can’t shake the anxiety and dread I feel every day going into work and having to hide it from my small, close knit team. Some mornings I wake up with heart palpitations, I have trouble sleeping and sometimes I don’t eat for whole days from the stress. I’m a software engineer but was a late career changer and prior to that I worked in the arts. I was an A-type in my last career, but in this career, but more specifically in this job, I feel like I am drowning. I have major anxieties when pressured to think on my feet or present/talk in groups even though I know I could do it if everyone wasn’t watching. I look like an idiot because I’m tripping over my words or blanking out and each time it happens, it knocks my confidence even more. I feel so stupid compared to my colleagues. I’m the least experienced in my team and I feel like I take so much longer to learn or achieve anything compared to everyone else. It doesn’t help that I’ve had brain fog over the past year which I suspect is from some trauma in 2020 (big breakup and general burnout I never resolved). The fogginess is affecting my cognitive abilities—I’m way more forgetful, scattered and not as sharp as before. It's really frightening. No one is telling me I’m doing a bad job but I know I am. The lockdowns have only exacerbated the anxiety and negative feelings and I feel like I can’t cope. On top of it all, I feel so guilty for not enjoying a good job. It’s stupid, but the biggest thing that holds me back from quitting aside from not having anything else lined up is the thought of the extra stress I’ll endure having to explain everything to my team and the guilt of letting down some excellent people. Some days I feel like I can push through and other days I feel like I must leave in order to get better.

Bulldogbobby73 Heart rate
  • replies: 5

Hi everyone, I have been feeling okay lately, still have moments of anxiety. Had a moment this morning about how fast my heart was beating, I had my arms folded and for a brief moment it felt like my pulse was high, this instantly put me in panic mod... View more

Hi everyone, I have been feeling okay lately, still have moments of anxiety. Had a moment this morning about how fast my heart was beating, I had my arms folded and for a brief moment it felt like my pulse was high, this instantly put me in panic mode and have been anxious ever since. my biggest phobia is my heart rate and I have to constantly resist taking my pulse as it was taking over my life. Another thing is, it seems I don’t feel anxious yet I am always vigilant regarding my heart rate, seems to always be in the back of mind - ironically my heart rate seems higher since taking my BP meds, even though my BP had gone down to normal, also every time I see my doc my heart rate is in the normal range and makes me feel I going mad, I’ve also had all the tests and all have come back normal - yet I still cannot shake this anxiety, is there anyone out there who has the same or similar thing??

bitter_biscuit Feeling like I black out for a second
  • replies: 8

Hi guys, I've been dealing with severe anxiety for just under a year now and have made some progress with counselling etc. Though I don't panic as much anymore, I still get this weird symptom occasionally where I'll be sitting down (usually on my pho... View more

Hi guys, I've been dealing with severe anxiety for just under a year now and have made some progress with counselling etc. Though I don't panic as much anymore, I still get this weird symptom occasionally where I'll be sitting down (usually on my phone or laptop) and I'd feel like the room just tips over very quickly, I feel like I pass out and my heartbeat become very palpable, and then it'll be gone in just a split second. Like my brains been washed over in a rush of darkness. Sometimes it only happens once, but today it has already happened twice. Has anyone else ever experienced this and have you managed to find out a cause? And has anyone managed to treat it? I might go and see a GP just to be sure, as I do tend to think of the worst possible scenario (typical health anxiety... ) It is honestly the one thing that scares me the most and I find myself worrying for the rest of the day.