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Chris_B Forums etiquette: give support to receive support
  • replies: 0

Hi everyone, particularly any new members who may be reading. From time to time, we get contacted by members who are unhappy that they haven’t received a lot of replies to their posts. Our community champions work very hard to make sure that all newb... View more

Hi everyone, particularly any new members who may be reading. From time to time, we get contacted by members who are unhappy that they haven’t received a lot of replies to their posts. Our community champions work very hard to make sure that all newbies are welcomed when they first post, and we understand that it’s a big step to post for the first time on a forum like this, especially if you aren’t feeling great. It’s important to remember, though, that these forums are a community of real people, just like you, not a one-on-one support environment like going to see your psychologist. To get the best out of being here, one of the best tips we can offer is give support to receive support. Being a good community member means: participating in different threads (not just your own), replying to people who have taken the time to reply to you (even if it’s just to say thank you), and... posting words of emotional support and encouragement when you see others who are hurting and reaching out. You don’t have to feel obliged to solve the problems of others: that’s not what we’re here for. But you can offer empathy and what you’ve learned from your own life experiences, even if it’s just a line or two, eg. “I don't know what to say, but I want to give you my support and tell you I care about what is happening to you and hope life will get better soon.” Try to develop an interest in the journeys of others here on the forums. You may be surprised at how good being an active, caring member here can make you feel. For those of you who have had good experiences giving support here on the forums, please post in this thread here and let us know how it has helped you on your journey.

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Justin95 Comparison is the death of happiness
  • replies: 1

Why is it that I constantly compare my appearance to other people. I am a male that is 5 foot 8. I’m 22 years old. At 75kilos. Just today I saw a man that looked better than me, he had a v shaped chest with a six pack abs. He gets plenty of attention... View more

Why is it that I constantly compare my appearance to other people. I am a male that is 5 foot 8. I’m 22 years old. At 75kilos. Just today I saw a man that looked better than me, he had a v shaped chest with a six pack abs. He gets plenty of attention especially from the ladies but I get ignored. No matter how I try too look good I always feel ugly when I go outside. Is there something wrong with me. How do you feel when there’s someone better looking than you?

PsychedelicFur Feeling out of place
  • replies: 2

Hello all, Let me give a short clarification ; I have always been what most would call a ‘solitary loner.’ Sure - I’ve had friends! Although I have never HAD A BEST FRIEND REALLY. Although many were not exactly my age. More of the older demographic, ... View more

Hello all, Let me give a short clarification ; I have always been what most would call a ‘solitary loner.’ Sure - I’ve had friends! Although I have never HAD A BEST FRIEND REALLY. Although many were not exactly my age. More of the older demographic, if you will. I just feel incredibly lonely and like such a misfit. I feel like a sore toe that is sticking out, quite hideously and badly. When I finally find someone who I genuinely think could make a great ‘best friend’ I then shortly find out that they already have someone that they call - a best friend. I have never been someone’s best friend. And it really stinks! I suppose, I don’t really like the term ‘best friend’ anyway...come to think of it! I feel so out of place. So disorientated. And even more so utterly devastated and confused. Recently, I was diagnosed with high functioning autism by my psychologist. I proud of myself for getting a proper diagnosis. And above all of that it was a bit of a relief for me. Finally I could identify the problem.. not that autism is a problem as such. I just finally knew that my brain was not wired like a non-autistic person’s. So I think a lot differently to most people. I just feel trapped and heavily misunderstood. I feel like I am just there in the corner and people don’t want to understand me because I am a little eccentric (personality and appearance wise) I feel misunderstood, overlooked and quite honestly a little invisible! Signed a sad, PF

blue_skies1 OCD?
  • replies: 13

Hi, I was wondering if anyone could help me point me in the right direction to get help about my irrational behaviours. The one that affects my life the most at this moment is the number of times I need to vacuum clean a day. To me, it doesn't feel l... View more

Hi, I was wondering if anyone could help me point me in the right direction to get help about my irrational behaviours. The one that affects my life the most at this moment is the number of times I need to vacuum clean a day. To me, it doesn't feel like a big task (as I just use the stick vacuum) to sweep up any crumbs or pet hairs I can see on the floors. But the problem is that it drives my partner crazy. He says it's excessive the amount of times I vacuum (I probably use the stick vacuum about 4-5 times to pick up things from the floor). I know it probably is unreasonable but if I don't do it, I can't relax and feel comfortable. I feel like I'm not even a 'clean freak' because there are other filthy places of the house I won't bother cleaning, it's more the visible things on the floor that I can't stand. I also noticed more recently I can't stand the way the carpet pile goes in different directions and I need it smoothed out. I'll step over uneven patches to make them smooth again (I know this is irrational but I can't stop doing it). During my high school years I had also experienced excessive hand washing that was very detrimental to the skin on my hands - they were always cracked and sore from overwashing. I couldn't get rid of the 'dusty' feeling on my hands and it could only be relieved from washing them with soap. I have no idea how or when I left that behaviour behind but I don't do that anymore. This was more for some background information but I'm more concerned about how I can actually stop the urge to vacuum so often. I KNOW it doesn't need to be done more than once a day, but how do I leave it alone? I feel hopeless because these behaviours are beginning to impact others. Does anyone know whether it sounds like OCD? Because recent articles I've read keep saying that 'OCD isn't about cleanliness etc' so I'm confused as to whether it is. Thank you to anyone who has bothered to read this extremely long post.

Andre_P My insomnia has insomnia
  • replies: 5

Well I haven’t been on here in ages. I gotta be honest I’ve been degrading month by month. I normally don’t like talking about stuff lately. You know the old talk positive and she’ll be right attitude - Yea I’m just not feeling it. my ocd is soo bad ... View more

Well I haven’t been on here in ages. I gotta be honest I’ve been degrading month by month. I normally don’t like talking about stuff lately. You know the old talk positive and she’ll be right attitude - Yea I’m just not feeling it. my ocd is soo bad now I’m literally battling mental rituals in my head constantly. Trying some meds but they ain’t helping. I yell things out to shut things down but that barely helps. It’s beyond ridiculous now. I know they are phantom fears, some one tell my brain that. it’s hard to shut down the thousands of negative thoughts I get and even harder to process normal thoughts or tasks whilst these other negative thoughts are in my head. my insomnia is so bad I literally sleep an average of 3 - 4 hours a night and the sleep is crap as. I feel like a crack head but I don’t do drugs. it’s been 18 months now. I am seriously considering the dsp but I only have a clinical psychologist who can help me and a registered psychologist. Is this enough. to be fair I don’t like meds so I do not want to see a psychiatrist again. Meds are too risky for me, I don’t even like the feeling I’m getting currently on my meds. I will persevere for awhile tho on them. Gp meds they are. I know meds now sound like my only option but I was actually doing better seeing my psychologist more regularly. I know I can get out of this without meds but I need time and a hell of a lot of it. Worrying about Centrelink and even the next cert expire is not helping. Cbt from my psychologist will work, I just haven’t seen him in 2 months. Seeing him in 3 days. I will need a dsp for 2 years to sort myself out. If anyone can help me that would be much appreciated. the bladder thing kinda settled down but then all this other crap came up. To be honest I preferred the bladder thing (psychosomatic not anatomical). I have a psychical disability too but I barely even care about that. I would chop off both my legs and 1 hand if it meant having a normal brain. Mental health is soo important it’s not funny

Moonchild 11:11 Fearing the fear
  • replies: 3

I’ve recently begun having panic attacks I’m slowly learning to de escalate myself from them. I’d love some insight on fearing the fear or living in a state of apprehension as this is how I can best describe my anxiety at the moment. I think subconsc... View more

I’ve recently begun having panic attacks I’m slowly learning to de escalate myself from them. I’d love some insight on fearing the fear or living in a state of apprehension as this is how I can best describe my anxiety at the moment. I think subconsciously as I’m not always aware what I was thinking when it happens that I may be sort of stuck in this state of anticipation of something happening. My anxiety was centred mostly around the vaccine oddly it peaked after having it and I started fixating on the physical symptoms of what I assume is the anxiety… the scariest one for me being the heart palpitations and chest pains. I also experience muscle twitches and tensing and shooting pains all over my body. I’ve seen my dr and I have a psychologist appointment next week… I have had some tests and they have come back ok but I can’t shake the invasive thoughts that I have some underlying illness. I want to break free from these thoughts. I’m also finding places I’ve had the palpitations triggering. For example the bath or the shower.. I just got out of the shower and my heart was racing. I busied myself getting dressed etc and it continued I find going outside to sit helpful so I did that and it settled but each time it happens brings me back to the thought cycle. Is it really anxiety? Or do I have some awful heart condition? Any help would be greatly appreciated xx

EC123 Anxiety and Muscle Weakness/Shaking/Spasms
  • replies: 8

Hi all, I'm still fairly new here, but just need to explain what i'm feeling as i currently feel like i am going insane. I've had anxiety/OCD/health anxiety for most of my life, but recently this has escalated a lot. For the past few weeks, for most ... View more

Hi all, I'm still fairly new here, but just need to explain what i'm feeling as i currently feel like i am going insane. I've had anxiety/OCD/health anxiety for most of my life, but recently this has escalated a lot. For the past few weeks, for most days, i feel so incredibly weak and shaky in my arms and legs. When i stand they tremble, i get muscle spasms, i feel like i cannot hold myself up properly and this just sends me into a spiral. Of course i've googled and googled and googled and have made myself believe that i have every condition out there, but i just want to know if other people experience this? The weakness and trembling is particularly in my upper legs and forearms and tends to get bad when i go to bed and right before i fall asleep. I know anxiety can cause many physical sensations, but these are not letting up and i am so concerned. Please let me know if you have felt this way before! Super distressed Thank you!

AnxiousFriend Feeling crushed under the anxiety of large life decisions and alone in my experience. How can I cope and does anyone else struggle with this?
  • replies: 8

I've always had anxiety and I typically manage it fine through speaking to my counsellor when I need to. The past few years though I've noticed my anxiety become totally immense and all consuming when it comes time to make a large life decision. Rece... View more

I've always had anxiety and I typically manage it fine through speaking to my counsellor when I need to. The past few years though I've noticed my anxiety become totally immense and all consuming when it comes time to make a large life decision. Recently I was looking to buy a house with my partner. The house itself was fine but I wasn't in the best headspace leading up to the decision and so my partner was the one doing most of the heavy lifting. We had a few days to finalise our decision and I basically had a mental breakdown. I made myself sick, with constant fear and panic and inability to see light from dark. I had to say no to the house on the grounds of needing to get healthy again before I could make such an important decision. Since saying no I've been speaking to my counsellor regularly, and I've also started on Lexapro about 2 weeks ago, but my anxiety hasn't eased. It's become even more all consuming. I'm in a constant state of panic about my job (wondering if I'm not doing well enough), my relationship (wondering if I'm not meant to be with my partner), regret (about not buying a great property), or worrying that my experiences partying and using recreational drugs have ruined my brain and I'll never be normal again. The biggest one is the partner decision, it's hit my like a truck out of nowhere following the decision on whether to buy a house and I'm being snowed under by it. I'm putting off my work, I can't focus and I just want to feel normal again. I'll talk to my therapist only to feel terrible again the next morning. I desperately want my medication to start working but I'm also scared the emotional blunting will push me away from my partner who I really do love. My anxiety is the only emotion I've felt for about a month. I try to think rationally about my relationship but my anxiety is always the loudest voice in the room. I struggle to feel happiness or sadness or anything else. I'm considering seeing a clinical psychologist, and have been considering going into an inpatient program because right now I'm just not functioning. I guess I just wanted to understand if anyone else struggles like this? I asked my therapist if the extent of my anxiety is normal and he said for most patients no, but it is for some. I'm just a bit scared I'll never be able to make big decisions, and will sabotage things like my relationship and career.

Keeeks84 Corner of Struggle Street & Alone Avenue
  • replies: 7

Hi All, I'm new here. I ended up here after I google searched why my tongue was dry and apparently it's from anxiety - which makes sense because these days, my anxiety is through the roof. I live in Sydney and in one of the LGA's in lockdown. I am no... View more

Hi All, I'm new here. I ended up here after I google searched why my tongue was dry and apparently it's from anxiety - which makes sense because these days, my anxiety is through the roof. I live in Sydney and in one of the LGA's in lockdown. I am not allowed out of my LGA and I don't know anyone that lives within a 5km radius to join the singles bubble. All of my friends and family are in the other LGA's that are locked down. I live alone and I am so thankful that I still have a job and can work from home. I know alot of people are unable to which I couldn't imagine how hard that would be. On the weekend I had major anxiety. I've always struggled with it but last weekend was just ridiculous. I am struggling with not knowing how long we are going to be in this for. I understand the need for a lockdown, however, it doesn't seem to be improving anything. Not being able to see my family and friends really sucks. Before the complete lockdown, I was able to go to the office a few days a week which was great, because I had people there to talk to. I work for a great company and everyone that works there is like family. So not seeing them every day is hard. Obviously we talk on the phone but it's not the same. I worry every day that I have the stupid disease. Even though I've hardly left the house. The last time I went somewhere was last week when I had my first Pfizer vaccine. Since then I've had a negative test. I've stopped watching the 11am updates because it's too depressing and I've stopped going on facebook every 5 seconds. But even without that, you still can't avoid it. It's when the ads come on and they tell you how dangerous it is and that you should get vaccinated. There's no escape. My work has some agreement with councellors so I started with them. I need control over this. I've also emailed the Premier (lol) and NSW Health asking if I am able to move in with my Dad and sister for the duration of the lockdown due to my mental health. Just waiting on their response as I don't want to do it and then get in trouble. I'm a sucker for rules and I don't like to break them. I'm also grieving the loss of my Aunty who passed in May. I feel like i haven't had the chance to feel it. I spent a long time looking after her in her final months. It's hard to grieve when you can't see your family because you feel so alone. So that's me in a nutshell. I hope you're all keeping safe and soldiering on.

alayl What am I supposed to do?
  • replies: 2

I'm 23 and I haven't worked a day in my life. I have a lot of anxiety regarding job search and can never convince myself to actually apply for jobs even though its required through centrelink, and even if I did I am no way ready for a job interview. ... View more

I'm 23 and I haven't worked a day in my life. I have a lot of anxiety regarding job search and can never convince myself to actually apply for jobs even though its required through centrelink, and even if I did I am no way ready for a job interview. I don't feel capable and I don't feel good enough. Recently my job providers have decided i'm too difficult to work with and are less inclined to help me, which is how it went with my previous provider as well. So I feel stuck, have been for years. I've done some voluntary work, which was basically putting me on register and call anybody else to deal with the problems I faced. I don't feel like it taught me anything about how to work independently. I have no desire to work in any specific industry, I have no passion or anything. I spoke to my gp who decided I was neither anxious nor depressed despite being formally diagnosed with social anxiety. I have spoken to psychologists previously, several actually, I told them what I wanted out of my sessions and I ended up having anxiety explained to me, like i haven't seen several psychologists before who'd given me the same explanation. I know how it works and why it does what it does but that doesn't change that i'm still very much anxious. I don't have skills or anything desirable. I bailed out of TAFE because my anxiety and I suck at studying in general. I have absolutely nothing to offer. I don't even have a personality yet I still need to find work.

Bell87 Health anxiety running my life
  • replies: 23

Hi all, I haven’t posted in a long time but I’m really struggling with my health anxiety. So I recently got my jab and because I read up on the side effects eg myocarditis I’m completely freaking out that I’m going to get it. I got the needle yesterd... View more

Hi all, I haven’t posted in a long time but I’m really struggling with my health anxiety. So I recently got my jab and because I read up on the side effects eg myocarditis I’m completely freaking out that I’m going to get it. I got the needle yesterday and was anxious then I started thinking I have it as my chest felt funny. I went to sleep fine and thought if I do have it, it would stay and I would feel it all the time. I did read the stats and it is rare. Why do I do this to myself? I currently don’t see anyone or take any medication. I don’t like seeking help as I feel stupid when I go because I can’t control my emotions and just cry all the time. I just can’t bring myself to go and get the help I know I need.