Anxious about something that may not ever happen please help!

[JesAnxious]

This is going to sound CRAZY! - But I have this fear that I am thinking about OVER AND OVER... and I cannot stop it.
It is on repeat and I am googling and researching and staying up late...

It is a fear that Snapchat doesn't actually delete it's photos that are sent, and that a secret hacker will hack Snapchat and all my old inappropriate photos I sent when I was younger (and dumber) will be out for the world to see and I will loose everything and everyone.

I am loosing my mind!

Can someone please help me. (I suffer from anxiety on a DAILY basis, but this thought has got my brain hooked)

Would appreciate any advice!

[Guest_342]

Dear Jes,

I can relate to this very well. Although I have never had this specific (snapchat) worry, I had a number of significant concerns that I would spend hours every day ruminating about. In hindsight, these were many many wasted hours during which I was only partially engaged with what was going on around me - e.g. when I was with family and friends I was only half there because I had to finish off a particular thought.

And the silly thing about these thoughts was that I would eventually get to a point where I believed I had all the ‘evidence’ to feel ok about it but then, not long after, something would switch in my brain causing me to have to start the same thought process all over again. It was just exhausting!

Now, I’ve not used Snapchat before and also don’t know the details on how or if historical chats are saved. But what I would say is that, whether or not those things are saved, there are many things in life that we cannot change or control and no amount of worrying or googling or ruminating will change it. And also be comforted by the fact that not a single person has a completely clean record - we’ve all done silly things 🙂 Generally, I don’t think reasonable people would judge us for these things.

I understand how tempting it is to go to google to get that peace of mind but, speaking from experience, the more likely outcome is that this activity will throw up more questions than answers and possibly make you feel worse.

The best thing I ever did was to talk to my parents, and then my GP, about these intrusive worries. The treatment I received (and I won’t provide details, as every person is unique and what works for one person might not work for another) has been life changing and has given me the space in my mind to better deal with these worries and see them for what they really are. I still do have set backs where I feel these worries coming back, and it has been a long road but I feel better equipped to deal with them now.

Believe me, there is a way to get through this and start enjoying life again.

Happy to chat further if you’d like.

[JesAnxious]

Wow,

Thank you so much for your message and responding to me. It is so nice to gain some clarity and not feel so alone in this trap! (mind game of a life time)

Surprisingly I have managed to accept the snap chat worry and move on from it but today I have a new worry that my friends will talk about me behind my back and ruin my life because of a passing comment I said which they probably don't even remember! And if they did then the comment doesn't even really matter. But here I am back in on the worry train!

I think I need help remembering that every thing will be okay. And that the world won't end.

How does the medication help you think differently? How does it change the mind game thinking circle?

[Guest_342]

Hi Jes,

I’m so pleased to hear you have moved away from the worry about snapchat, but sorry to hear it has been replaced with something else. But it’s great that you seem to have recognised that the thoughts are irrational.

I found that my obsessive/intrusive worries generally would only go away by replacing them with a new worry. Annoying, huh?

I don’t want to advise you on medical treatment, as I’m not a doctor but because you have asked I am happy to share my experience with my GP’s prescription. For me personally, it took a little while to start working but gradually I noticed that I was spending less time with my worrying thoughts, was less inclined to engage with them at all and, if they came across my mind (as worries naturally do with all people), I have gained the head space to step back and think, “Hang on a minute, this thought is not helpful, so I’ll think about it once and then be done with it.” It’s given me the space to develop perspective. Back when my mind was overloaded with recurring worries, I did have the toolkit to address them but there was no space in my mind to actually make use of it.

There is absolutely nothing to be embarrassed about by confiding in your doctor that you feel unable to cope and need help. I think you and I have experienced something a little similar, and I’m hoping you can feel as in control and generally pretty happy as I do now, some time very soon!

I’m here if you need to chat some more. Big hugs.