Dear Adrian
Hello and welcome to the forum. Good to have you here.
I have not had this precise experience but we often have a physical reaction to stress. I am disappointed your counsellors have not picked up on general physical reactions. My guess is you feel this particular action because it is easier for your body to 'twitch' in that manner. Others may have a small vulnerability in other parts of their bodies. And of course there is always the full blown panic attack with racing heart, chest pains, nausea, and feelings of dread etc.
It seems to me that bodily reactions to stress are quite normal. It's a left over from the fight/flight/freeze reaction which our distant ancestors needed to stay alive. Any situation that smacks of danger produces this reaction. A psychiatrist told me when I had a reaction to a particularly bad situation that it was an amygdala hijack. Our primitive brains at the base of the head take over our behaviour and we do whatever it dictates. I had one such situation and only know what happened when I was told afterwards. Now that's scary.
Other types of reactions can be minor behaviours from the panic attack such as a feeling of dread, increased heart rate etc but not always a huge panic attack (thank goodness). Of course I am not an expert in this area but that's how it appears from my experience of anxiety and depression. How does that sit with you?
I can understand how teaching in high school can be challenging as you are dealing with what my mom used to call growing pains. I think she meant adolescence but no one knew that word then.Having four children of my own and later grandchildren I do appreciate the work done by teachers. Rewarding yes, but hard work. Thank you.
If you see a counsellor again ask about this. Interesting to know what they think. To me it's on a par with sneezing when you have a cold. A straight forward action or reaction. No one thinks it strange to sneeze, well only if you sneeze over them.
I hope that helps.
Mary
