Anxiety too Paranoia ?

[Jade_94]

Hi,

I believe I have been suffering anxiety for a few years now. I have 'self diagnosed' . I never thought it was bad enough to go to the gp, but I've noticed a few things starting to get worse.

mostly how paranoid I'm getting... I have two kids, and I'm so worried about them all the time.

When they are sick even with just a cold i literally feel their heart to make sure they are breathing..

I also struggle with the fear of death, I cannot stand when I'm in bed trying to fall asleep and the thought crosses my mind, I feel the worst anxiety when thinking 'I'm going to die one day , and that is certain ' its really terrifies me.. To the point I have to distract myself asap..

I am also becoming very angry all the time Which effects my relationship with my partner. I tell him I have anxiety maybe even depression and I HATE when he says "its all in your head"

I know its not.

And also the other usual triggers get me, mess, driving etc but those are really low triggers..

I also have those really bad days, where I rock up to work and can't even form a conversation because my anxiety is making me nervous, I stand there twidderling my thumbs thinking over and over about how anxious I feel..

I have had about 1 panic attack every year

But I can't seam to get the guts to talk to my GP? What do I say ? And how ?

Its always at the lowest I really want to talk to her. But then the next day I will feel fine, so I think oh maybe its a one off?

But then I'll have a bad week , and the circle goes on..

im also not sure what if she wants me to speak to a therapist? Or whatever there called? I'm so unsure on the idea..

Any tips on what I should do ?

Thank you all.

Im 23 by the way also

[PamelaR]

Hello Jade. Welcome to the Beyond Blue Forums. It's so good that you have found your way here especially while you're feeling the way you are. When you're experiencing a panic attack it's so not easy knowing what to do. So being here is good. There are lots of supportive people on the forums. Explore the threads. Being mindful that some might cause more anxiety. You'll need to see how you go.

I'm sorry to hear about how you feel when trying to sleep. You have already realised those thoughts won't help you go to sleep either. Is there anything else you can do before going to bed that will help? For example, I do a lot of meditation and listening to peaceful music. I set aside a time during the day (not when going to bed) to look at those things that are causing me to worry or to become anxious and try to find ways of dealing with them in a more organised way so I feel in control. If you are truly unable to stop the thoughts of dying and need someone to talk to there are a number of options you have -

• phone Beyond Blue (BB) support line 1300 22 4636
• phone Lifeline 13 11 14
• log onto the BB online forums here
• suicide help line 1300 659 467

I understand what you mean about the cycle. It feels like it's never going to end. Just as you feel on top of things. Off it goes again, to drain you.

The difficulties of mentioning it to your gp is also common among many who get anxiety. I don't know about you but I perspire and I get heart palpitations - almost immediately. It then makes everything I want to say harder because I'm so embarrassed by my perspiration - mainly cos it think it's a dead give away.

But gps are very understanding, especially if you have been going to the same one for awhile. It's not easy with some who you're just seeing for the first time.

Some tips for you

• talk to your gp asap
• breath in for 5, out for 5. From your diaphragm. Focus on your breath.
• relax your shoulders as you are breathing
• go for a long walk during the day to get some exercise
• have a look at https://www.beyondblue.org.au/the-facts/anxiety

Hope some of this helps in some way. There is so much more we can discuss. However, the number of characters left is running out. If you have any further specific questions, just pop back in here or have a chat on line here at BB between 12pm-3pm

[smallwolf]

What Pamela said is spot on so I won't repeat what she said...

As for your self diagnosis... I was actually the opposite to you for a number of years. Yes there was a constant lump in the throat, a feeling of emptiness etc. My image of what anxiety and depression was much different to reality. I thought I was fine? Yet something happened which changed all that and I could not cope. And so I reached out for help. I was nervous, but I also knew deep down that I could not go on like this. While it was not obvious in my work output, it affected every other aspect of my life, for the worse.

What I am trying to say is this... everyone is unique! There is no right or wrong answer with respect to how you are feeling and in my view the only real way to find out is to look for some sort of professional guidance.

The benefit of this also is that those people you speak to will be able to the provide with the tools to cope with negative thoughts, anxiety, etc. And the two best things (IMO) about a seeing a psych (in my case) is that I can say whatever I like, AND I am not judged. With the help of a psych, I get to explorer the causes of why things occur, and methods to combat these thoughts. There are times when questions are uncomfortable (to me), but also know that she and I have a system in place, such that if I don't answer then question (ie stay silent), she will know the answer.

On talking to a GP... the first thing to do is make a double booking (at least I had to). When the doctors asks and you tell them what it relates to (and I will talk about myself here on...) I was then queried about any physical symptoms, family history of mental illness, how I was feeling, and then there was a brief questionnaire. From there it was/is a referral to a psych for a 2nd opinion or you might get an MHP? I had to see psych before getting a MHP. We can talk about that part later. But know (in my instance) the difference between a doctor and psych... what I might exhibit to a doctor vs psych can be two different things. In one case, it might appear as "mild" (read that how you want) but when I saw the psych, I has severe anxiety and depression.

Now it is time to follow the steps in Pamela's response. Best of luck.

[Jade_94]

Thank you Pamela!

I also get heart palpitations! Actually I just logged on here because I was getting them for the last 10 minutes. They scare me, but I always try to tell myself it isn't as bad as I think .

Thank you so much for your kind words. I really want to talk to my doctor I will try and book an appointment next week. Hopefully I don't chicken out !

Ill keeo you updated

[Ggrand]

Hello Jade,

I'm sorry you have palpitations, they can be very scared,

I find the best way to manage them when I get them is deep breathing, counting each breath as you go.. Sometimes something that works for one person doesn't alway work for another..

There are a couple of threads on here that can give you some ideas to calm yourself when struggling with anxiety,,

One thread is called " coping tools". The other thread is called " grounding yourself". your very welcome to read through these if you feel like it as they should give you some good strategies , for when anxiety gets overwhelming.

Please look after yourself and let your gp know how your feeling and the symptoms that you also are experiencing, so he/she can get you the best possible help available for you..

Kind thoughts

Grandy.

[PamelaR]

Hi Jade, with a wave to Grandy 👋

Yes, agreed palpitations are the absolute pits. While you have 'self diagnosed', it is extremely important that you get these palpitations assessed by the gp, just in case it's nothing else. For example, my recent bout of palpitations was constant and very annoying, none of my self help tools worked. There was a reason for this other than my mental health issues. It related to medication I was taking for another health issue. It's taken about 6-8 weeks to sort out. So the lesson for me is - don't make assumptions. Get assumptions tested!!

Let's know how you get on - Grandy and I'll be there when you visit your gp - holding your hand.

Virtual hugs to you Jade (if you're into hugs)

Kind regards

PamelaR