topic Re: Loss of Mum in Grief and loss

Loss of Mum

Guest_75144421 — Fri, 27 Dec 2024 08:54:25 GMT

I lost my mum nearly 5 weeks ago. I’m so broken, I don’t know how to live my life without my mum.

Mum was diagnosed with Lymphoma on 17th November 2023 and lost her battle on 24th November 2024. I was mum’s carer for the last 6 weeks of her life. I never left her side.

I am beside myself with grief and cannot find peace anywhere.

My Dad doesn’t want to talk about mum, I think he needs to.

I am so heartbroken and finding it difficult to get through each day.

Re: Loss of Mum

blondguy — Fri, 27 Dec 2024 12:00:24 GMT

Hello Guest

My sincere condolences for the loss of your mother. I understand the pain you are going through as my mother passed away 3 months ago and the loss cant be described.

Its just my very humble opinion.....You are spot on when you mentioned that your dad needs to 'talk' about the loss he has also experienced yet some people grieve in their own way. Talking 'to' your mum during your day will help provide some peace during the grieving process

There are many super caring people on the forums that can be here for you too

my heartfelt & kindest thoughts for you....

we are listening

Paul

Re: Loss of Mum

blondguy — Fri, 27 Dec 2024 12:11:00 GMT

NB: Being your mothers' carer for the final six weeks of her life would have been heart wrenching

we are listening (if you wish to talk)

Paul

Re: Loss of Mum

white knight — Fri, 27 Dec 2024 12:11:22 GMT

Hi, welcome

Everyone grieves differently, if your dad doesn't want to discuss her, best is to leave him be.

I'm sorry for your loss. My dad passed in 1992 at 64yo, I've missed him nearly every day. He was wonderful, but I also find it comforting to remind myself that my dad would want me to live to the full, so due to that, I limit my time I grieve. After my "reasonable time" usually 15 minutes I change my environment, even walk around the house, play with my dog or hobby.

Another habit I got into, is honouring my father the best way I can by adopting his attitude. Helping those less fortunate.

Planting a rose or lots of roses in my mind is better than visiting a cemetery. In fact that has helped me in my grief process so much I no longer visit cemeteries at all- ever.

I hope you can move forward eventually, time helps. But death is part of life as harsh as that sounds. You will grow more kind and appreciative through this tragedy- you beautiful mum will make sure of that.

Visit your GP if you cannot cope.

CARRY IT WITH YOU

As her child we wonder why

A bug in a jar or pinned butterfly

To preserve all for others to see

To observe nature and how it is so free

She used a broom to sweep and loved you

To erase her footprints as you nursed her true

If you had a choice as your grief grew

You'd bottle her heart... and carry it with you...

TonyWK