https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/sexuality-and-gender-identity/came-out-as-gay-and-am-dating-a-girl-but-i-feel-so-anxious/m-p/535794#M6029 <P>{for context a lot has changed in my life recently: i came out as gay to my parents, they didnt react the best but not the worst either. things at home got stressful everyday, so i moved out. now im struggling with that whole living independently situation so i might move back in}</P> <P>Back in about July i got Tinder as i became more confident with the possibility that i like girls. So i wanted to start dating to see what it would be like. The dates were fun, but it seems that i kept putting myself in a friendzone because i feel this massive anxiety in my stomach whenever i sense something intimate-y is about to occur. </P> <P>This caused so much frustration because i know i get turned on by girls but when im actually with one, it really scares me.</P> <P>Currently ive been dating a girl for about a month and a half - i have loved getting to know her and i am happy to keep seeing her, but i still get crazy anxious about things getting intimate, every morning i wake up with anxiety because i have no idea what im doing, and i feel this terrible sense of guilt.</P> <P>I don’t know if this makes sense, so ask questions if you need, but if theres anyone out there who kinda gets this or has dealt with this in the past, i would love to hear some tips.</P> Wed, 16 Dec 2020 01:09:08 GMT katelia_89 2020-12-16T01:09:08Z https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/sexuality-and-gender-identity/came-out-as-gay-and-am-dating-a-girl-but-i-feel-so-anxious/m-p/535794#M6029 <P>{for context a lot has changed in my life recently: i came out as gay to my parents, they didnt react the best but not the worst either. things at home got stressful everyday, so i moved out. now im struggling with that whole living independently situation so i might move back in}</P> <P>Back in about July i got Tinder as i became more confident with the possibility that i like girls. So i wanted to start dating to see what it would be like. The dates were fun, but it seems that i kept putting myself in a friendzone because i feel this massive anxiety in my stomach whenever i sense something intimate-y is about to occur. </P> <P>This caused so much frustration because i know i get turned on by girls but when im actually with one, it really scares me.</P> <P>Currently ive been dating a girl for about a month and a half - i have loved getting to know her and i am happy to keep seeing her, but i still get crazy anxious about things getting intimate, every morning i wake up with anxiety because i have no idea what im doing, and i feel this terrible sense of guilt.</P> <P>I don’t know if this makes sense, so ask questions if you need, but if theres anyone out there who kinda gets this or has dealt with this in the past, i would love to hear some tips.</P> Wed, 16 Dec 2020 01:09:08 GMT https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/sexuality-and-gender-identity/came-out-as-gay-and-am-dating-a-girl-but-i-feel-so-anxious/m-p/535794#M6029 katelia_89 2020-12-16T01:09:08Z https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/sexuality-and-gender-identity/came-out-as-gay-and-am-dating-a-girl-but-i-feel-so-anxious/m-p/535795#M6030 Hi, welcome <BR /> <BR />Guilt is likely the core issue for various reasons mostly expectations from others. <BR /> <BR />Other than that anxiety you're experiencing is no different to when I dated decades ago as a heterosexual. <BR /> <BR />Google <BR /> <BR />Beyondblue topic guilt the tormentor <BR /> <BR />TonyWK Wed, 16 Dec 2020 05:14:49 GMT https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/sexuality-and-gender-identity/came-out-as-gay-and-am-dating-a-girl-but-i-feel-so-anxious/m-p/535795#M6030 white knight 2020-12-16T05:14:49Z