topic I want my best friend back in Young people

I want my best friend back

maybeunsure — Wed, 02 Dec 2015 06:12:23 GMT

So this guy and I have been friends for 10 months and I consoder him to be my best friend.

A week after we met, he got drunk and told me a lot about himself, including that he has depression. For 8-9 months he seemed fine and we grew really close.

Then he started shutting me out and kept making excuses for not hanging out with me. I know a series of things have happened as he told me about them and they've obviously taken their toll on him.

One night he opened up a bit but wouldn't tell me anymore than I already knew. But I told him that I'm going through the same feeligs and thoughts and now he thinks that my problems are more important than his, which they most definitely are not. I thought this was a bit of a turning point but the next day he went back to ignoring me.

I had tickets to see a movie and invited him along, which he happily agreed to. But on the night he stood me up. So I saw it alone.

Since that night he has apologized nunerous times for being rude and understands if I hate him, which I don't.

I'm sick of him apologizing and want him to do something about it. But I can't force him to talk to me or hang out with me.

I just want to help him and work through our problems together.

I don't know what to do.

I want my best friend back

Jacko777 — Wed, 02 Dec 2015 23:02:06 GMT

Hello maybeunsure,

I think you fellas could just be mates and do fun stuff together, forget about trying to help each other for a while. You can help each other by enjoying positive times together, giving each other new experiences and positive happy moments to focus on. You can be concerned for each other, motivate each other to get help but you don't have to try and fix each other. A friendship is just one of the many parts that make up 'you', the many parts together bring you strength.

Jack

I want my best friend back

Narniakid — Thu, 03 Dec 2015 03:23:27 GMT

Hey maybeunsure, welcome to the forums and thank you for reaching out to us.

I agree with that Jack has said in which you should probably try not to take on each other's problems as your own. I've been in a similar situation to yours, and it is only instinct to want to share the load, however it can be damaging as one person can take on more than the other, etc.

Whatever the reason for his behaviour, it will be him trying to deal with his own problems, not something that you've done. Give him some time, and eventually he will come back - it sounds like he's going through a rough time at the moment. Hang tight and look after yourself in the meantime.

Crystal