topic Lost with no one to talk too... in Young people

Lost with no one to talk too...

M_ — Fri, 15 Jan 2016 08:11:34 GMT

I'm new to this, sorry if I say something wrong.

I few months ago I started feeling sad/upset a lot. I tried talking to my friends about it, but to them apparently from time to time I just snap at them for no reasons. According to them I've become annoying and needy and I'm pushing everyone away. I don't understand anymore. I don't have anyone to talk to, I live alone and there the only friends I have, I don't even know if I have them anymore. I just don't know what to do anymore

Lost with no one to talk too...

Bluey_moon — Fri, 15 Jan 2016 08:27:41 GMT

Oh M.

It sounds like you are having a really rough time!

Have you seen someone about you feelings, by that i mean your GP or a psychologist? They maybe able to offer some advice or help. There is also the Beyond Blue phne line or online chat.

How long have you been feeling this way, do you know what triggered it?

Lost with no one to talk too...

M_ — Fri, 15 Jan 2016 08:38:27 GMT

I'm scared. I don't really know how to and don't really know if I can/want too. I part of me wants to, but the other part feels like I'm just sulking for no reason. I've thought about using the online chat several times, but I feel like other people need it more than I do

Lost with no one to talk too...

Bluey_moon — Fri, 15 Jan 2016 08:48:40 GMT

Please don't be scared to, I have used both these services, they are both awesome, regardless of how minor you deem your problem to be, they are trained and give great advice!!!!

Lost with no one to talk too...

Bluey_moon — Fri, 15 Jan 2016 20:04:43 GMT

Just checking in to see how you are doing M?

Lost with no one to talk too...

M_ — Sun, 17 Jan 2016 20:42:06 GMT

Not too great. The last few days were okay, now I just feel exactly the same as before

Lost with no one to talk too...

Bluey_moon — Sun, 17 Jan 2016 21:04:23 GMT

Is there someone you can talk to? Have you thought of going to see your GP?

Keep talking on here!!

Lost with no one to talk too...

M_ — Sun, 17 Jan 2016 21:15:01 GMT

I spoke to someone at BB the other day. I don't really know if it helped, but honestly I don't really know what I expected from talking to someone. I know things obviously can't be fixed by one conversation, I just hoped I'd feel a bit better at least

Lost with no one to talk too...

White_Rose — Sun, 17 Jan 2016 21:16:29 GMT

Dear M

Thank you for writing in here and welcome to the forum. As Bluey Moon has said, there is a great deal of help available here. Many people find writing in and sharing their experiences is a great help for all sorts of reasons, one of which is the realisation they are not alone in their struggles.

They way you describe yourself and your feelings is something many of us can relate to. I often feel needy, get cranky with others, push people away and then cry because they go. We humans are so illogical. There are times when I feel a great emptiness inside me, other times when I just ache with emotional pain. Why not take a look at the information about anxiety and depression on this site. If you follow the links on anxiety or depression from the home page so could try the anxiety and depression checklist. This is a general indicator on how you stand on these situations.

Also look at all the information available. This may help you decide to see your GP. Try the BB helpline 1300 22 4636 which is open 24/7. Just think of it as a phone call to a friend.

Sometimes we go through these periods when everything seems so dreadful and dreary. Help is so readily available and could save you much heartache. I do urge you to make an appointment with your GP. It will make the chat easier if you write yourself a list of how you feel and what is happening in your life. How long has it been going on and can you think of a reason why it may have started. You may not have the answers to these questions but it's an idea to think about it.

Continue to write in here as I'm sure others will offer their support and stories.

Mary

Lost with no one to talk too...

Bluey_moon — Sun, 17 Jan 2016 21:24:39 GMT

i can relate to what you are saying, about wanting to feel better!

I am one who wants instant fixes often! but it just isn't that way M.

But keep talking! Mary gave you great advice!

Lost with no one to talk too...

Ladyhawke — Sun, 17 Jan 2016 21:39:08 GMT

Hi M,

I'm sorry you're going through a rough time at the moment.

There's no need to feel guilty about the way you're feeling. You sound as though you're not in a great place at the right now. Your friends may not understand what you're going through and may feel unable to help you; that may be why they've distanced themselves from you. They're still your friends, they just don't understand what you're going through.

Yes, it is scary and confusing when you feel the way you do. When I began having emotional problems, many years ago, I felt exactly the same way and I know many others do also. I did seek professional help and I was very scared, but after a few months it became much easier to talk to a professional about my feelings and issues. My only regret is that I didn't seek help earlier.

You've made a really good start. You've come to the forums to ask others, just like you, for advice and assistance.

I really feel you would help yourself to begin to feel better if you spoke with a kind, trained professional. I would suggest that you speak with your GP and ask to be referred on to a psychologist or psychiatrist, however, if you feel overwhelmed by the thought, then I really think you would benefit a great deal by telephoning BeyondBlue and discussing the issues you've raised here with an experienced professional. If you're nervous or get stuck, then just refer to what you've written in your post and they will take it from there. You will be speaking with a kind, experienced professional who has the resources and knowledge to give you practical advice.

I urge you to make contact as soon as you can. You don't want to feel like you do indefinitely, and the sooner you speak to someone who understands your situation, the closer you will be to feeling better. There is a great deal of help available - you just need to take that first step.

Best wishes

Lost with no one to talk too...

M_ — Mon, 18 Jan 2016 11:58:09 GMT

Thank you all so much for sharing your thoughts, it means I great deal to me. I had a pretty crappy start to the day but it didn't turn out so bad in the end. I'll be kept pretty busy during the day for the next few days which should help keep my mind of things.

I have made an appointment to see a GP. I don't really know what to say, it's hard, especially when I've been busy and distracted, I try to tell myself I'm fine when I'm probably not. I will try and write a list of things to say for my visit otherwise I'll convince myself that I won't need the appointment and cancel it

Lost with no one to talk too...

Ladyhawke — Mon, 18 Jan 2016 22:19:16 GMT

Dear M,

I'm so glad you've made an appointment to see your GP - that's the first important step to help yourself.

Also an excellent idea to make notes beforehand- it will help to give your doctor a clearer picture of what you're going through. I always make notes prior to seeing any doctor - it helps me to think more clearly and ensures I don't forget any important issues.

Good luck and let us know how things go - we're all interested in you getting help to feel better.

Best wishes

Lost with no one to talk too...

White_Rose — Tue, 19 Jan 2016 04:11:21 GMT

Great stuff that you have made an appointment to see your GP. Copy and print your original post, and any other post, to take with you. It gives you a great start and your GP should be able to take it from there.

Let us know how it goes.

Mary

Lost with no one to talk too...

M_ — Wed, 20 Jan 2016 23:59:58 GMT

My appointment is in the next few days. Normally when I'm kept busy I'm fine, but today after being awake for about an hour I started to feel so down and sad, I just wanted to burst into tears. I thought once I started my day and got busy I'd be okay again. But it hasn't work like that today, I just feel crap

Lost with no one to talk too...

White_Rose — Thu, 21 Jan 2016 19:39:05 GMT

Yes, I know that feeling. Just when you think it's safe to go back in the water... Having a plan for what to do when life gets crappy is very useful. Just being busy does not always work as you have found out. You need to engage in specific activities that help your mood and do not trigger other feelings. For example, going for a walk may be great if you have not had much physical activity. It helps to increase your oxygen flow, open up your body and produce beneficial endorphins. Not much good if you feel tired or brain is going at a million miles an hour and carries on going because there is nothing to stop it.

I find at those times I need something to totally occupy my mind. Can't concentrate on reading or TV so I turn to craft stuff because I can concentrate on that. So compile a list of things to do and if one does not work, try another. You will start to recognise what's the best thing in a particular situation by trying all different activities. And what works on one occasion will be useless another time. That's why you need a number of alternatives.

Having said all that, sometimes it's OK to just cry. You have your griefs to mourn and at times you need to stop and let out the sadness and pain. Keeping it locked up inside will not help. I know people often say they too tired when they cry. Well OK, go and rest afterwards. Tears are a great safety valve and we often feel much better after getting out all that emotion. It is legitimate. Well more than that, it's therapeutic.

Mary

Lost with no one to talk too...

M_ — Fri, 22 Jan 2016 08:21:42 GMT

So I was constantly changing my mind as to whether I was going to my appointment or not, yes or no, no or yes. I knew I was going though no matter how much I didn't want to or thought I didn't need it. Then this morning I get a call, my doctor was called away and my appointment was cancelled. I can't get back to the doctors now for almost two weeks. After I found out my appointment had been cancelled I thought I would've been relieved but I wasn't, I was upset and that surprised me.
The nights and weekends are the worst (so from now until Monday morning will be my worst). I was hoping to talk to the doctor today about it, but now I have to spend the next few days and nights alone without having talked to them, and that terrifies me

Lost with no one to talk too...

White_Rose — Fri, 22 Jan 2016 10:45:09 GMT

Dear M

First of all I suggest you contact your GP and tell them your appointment was cancelled and that it was urgent. In my experience they always have appointments for urgent situations. Certainly since they cancelled your appointment they should give you another much earlier than two weeks. Tell them you are in an urgent situation. Alternatively, go to another doctor although this not a guarantee of an earlier appointment.

If the receptionist is difficult, and often they are, then ask to speak to the doctor directly. It is not up to the reception people to determine urgency. You could also just turn up and wait until the doctor is available. It's a way of letting them know how much you need to talk to your GP.

Meanwhile, during the weekend, when you feel bad contact BB on 1300 22 4636. This is a 24/7 helpline. Or talk to them via the Chat Online between 3:00pm and midnight. Scroll to the bottom of the page and click on Chat Online.

Another excellent resource is the Kids Helpline. This is a service for people up to the age of 25. www.kidshelpline.com.au Phone them on 1800 55 1800 also available 24/7. Also try Headspace. You can organise face to face counselling with them. Check out their web site www.headspace.com.au They also have a 24/7 helpline 1800 650 890 plus an online chat facility. BB have a youth web site called The Desk. https://www.thedesk.org.au which you may find helpful.

I have to say I am pretty much disgusted with your doctor's surgery for not finding a much earlier appointment. It's pretty much accepted that when they cancel they find a new time pretty much immediately.

Please contact one or more of these helplines rather than spend the weekend becoming more upset. And write in here as often as you need to.

Mary