topic I don't know how I got here, lost! in Young people

I don't know how I got here, lost!

GirlLost — Wed, 06 Aug 2014 16:57:32 GMT

Hello :3

I worry all the time, I'm nervous, I cry daily (sometimes for no good reason at all), I feel empty - nothing brings me joy like it used to, I'm pushing friends and family away, I have become very self critical and stress like no one else. This has all become strongly apparent to me in the last month, however looking back on things a lot of this started mildly over the last year.

I had a fantastic childhood, growing up with my parents and older brother. I had many friends and best friends, participated in school activities and danced after school daily. My grades we average or slightly above, I had a real artsy side to me yet was also on the sports teams. I loved primary and high school.

I was lucky enough to get my first uni preference and am currently finishing the last semester of my 4 year degree. Additionally I work part time as an assistant in the field I am studying, and just celebrated my 5th anniversary with my boyfriend. This is what makes me so frustrated!! I have no legitimate reason to feel the way I do! I could sleep for days, every morning is a struggle to get out of bed, I eat to fill the emptiness emptiness inside, which leaves me feeling guilty and angry at myself. I have bailed on all Social outings and love the excuse of 'I'm not feeling well' to get me out of any human interaction. I have given up on my personal appearance and spend every day in my sweatpants and gym clothes ( not that I have time or motivation to go to the gym). The pressure of uni and work makes me snap at everyone, and leaves me with heart racing hen ever I think about my stressors.

I cant tell you the last time I have smiled or laughed. Everyday is a grudging battle leaving me tired and drained.

How did I get here?

Someone like me shouldn't be feeling this way.

Help x

I don't know how I got here, lost!

Snoman — Thu, 07 Aug 2014 02:16:35 GMT

Hi GirlLost,

Welcome to the BB forums.

Just because your life is "wonderful" doesn't make you immune to getting ill. That includes getting ill in your body or in your brain. I am like you in that my life is essentially pretty good. Only the normal kinds of problems in life, but basically great. Yet here we are.

The issue is not so much how you got here, but where to now? I suggest you start by seeing your GP. If you don't have one you are comfortable with, follow the links at the top of this page to find a GP in your area that has an interest in mental health. The GP may suggest seeing a psychologist or psychiatrist or start you on some antidepressants, or a combination.

There is a fair bit of information on this web site about depression and anxiety. Just follow the links at the top.

Please make the appointment to see a GP today. Do your best not to put it off.

Let us know how you go.

Snoman

I don't know how I got here, lost!

GirlLost — Thu, 07 Aug 2014 04:04:06 GMT

Hi snowman,

Its nice to hear I'm not alone.

I'm worried about seeking help, my boyfriend has been dealing with depression for the last 4 years and is on medication. He changed with medication but I'm not sure it was for the better, he feels numb all the time, I wouldn't say he was happy

I don't want people to know I have these feelings, they can suspect it all they want but I don't want it to be real for them, I don't want to be that person. Seeking help means I am that person.

I wish I was strong enough to fix it on my own, I want to find out how I got here and remove it from my life. I don't want to be zombied on medication I'm in my final semester of uni and need my brain even if it is complicated atm.