Everyone loves my best friend and I'm just there

Paigey123 — Tue, 13 Feb 2018 14:40:48 GMT

So we are a group of 5, 3 guys and 2 girls including myself.

My best friend is beautiful, tall and thin. I can look nice but nothing compared to her.

I just found out at all three friends are currently crushing on her at the same time. I feel so unneeded in my group, and so unattractive and hideous 😞 I don't like any of them that way but it would be lovely to be desired and appreciated. This may sound selfish but I'm sure a lot of girls understand what I mean

I have a history of anorexia and I can't help feeling that if I was thin again more guys would like me 😞 I just feel so worthless and gutted. It's actually such a humiliating feeling. All the care about is her. They don't even know how they make me feel. Any help guys? 😞

Everyone loves my best friend and I'm just there

Quercus — Wed, 14 Feb 2018 04:37:58 GMT

Hi Paigey123 and welcome to the forums.

I think many people here will relate to how you're feeling, I know I do.

I'm not attractive. And need to lose weight to boot. Have always been this way and felt hideous. Even before I noticed the male species. That just made it worse.

Then at uni I made a friend who I ended up sharing a unit with for years. She is gorgeous. The kind of gorgeous that when she crossed the street cars would stop even at a green light to stare. And it made me learn that being beautiful sucks too.

People assumed she was stupid.
She had few female friends and the ones who weren't jealous were mostly self absorbed and all about making themselves look hotter by having hot friends.
Blokes assumed she was easy
She had to work extra hard to be taken seriously at work

It was an eye opener. She is such a lovely person inside but noone cared about that. When you feel unwanted please keep in mind you're wanted by your best friend regardless of how you look.

It made me realise I may not be beautiful but that doesn't mean I am not attractive. Or wanted. She valued my friendship because I didn't care less about how she looked. I liked the substance within.

I am interesting in a different way and that's ok too. My husband always gets this look when I am babbling on about something I feel passionate about. He loves my enthusiasm and how I'm easily excited by simple things.

Saying that... I sincerely doubt you are hideous.

I think that it might be worth going back to the gp or psychologist who helped you manage your anorexia and having a talk about how the low self esteem is starting to bother you again.

You've managed your anorexia before and that is a fantastic achievement. But if this situation is making you feel bad about your body it is time to seek help.

I'm not sure if that helped at all. Felt like a ramble sorry.

I hope you can keep writing here and find some support to get you through this.

Nat

Everyone loves my best friend and I'm just there

jaha — Thu, 01 Mar 2018 05:11:14 GMT

i am

topic Everyone loves my best friend and I'm just there in Young people

Everyone loves my best friend and I'm just there

Everyone loves my best friend and I'm just there

Everyone loves my best friend and I'm just there