topic I'm new here: Depressed, anxious and lonely in Young people

I'm new here: Depressed, anxious and lonely

Rachh1492 — Sat, 06 Aug 2016 14:23:49 GMT

Hi, I'm New here and I just wanted to introduce myself.

My depression and anxiety started about 2/3 years ago, but it's taken a turn for the worst this year. A lot of things have happened with friends and family, and I've just got really depressed and I can't seem to get myself out of the rut. Any suggestions on fighting depression? I've also become very anxious in social situations and in class I'm I'm finding it very hard to participate in class discussions.

Please help,

thanks 🙂

I'm new here: Depressed, anxious and lonely

james1 — Sun, 07 Aug 2016 09:28:03 GMT

Hi Rach,

Welcome to the forums - we're all here to help you through this really difficult period with depression and anxiety.

It sounds like you have a lot on your plate and you're feeling a bit overwhelmed. Have you tried talking to your GP or someone else you trust? I started seeing a psychologist just recently and it is really amazing how much help a professionally trained person can be.

I'd also recommend giving the BeyondBlue helpline a call (1300 22 4636) who are available 24/7 and you can call them even if it's not an emergency, and you just need a friendly voice to listen to you.

Otherwise, I'm really glad that you've posted here as well. That shows a lot of courage to open up to complete strangers. Can I ask, if you're comfortable, what has triggered this bout of depression and anxiety?

Sending you hugs in this difficult time!

James

I'm new here: Depressed, anxious and lonely

Wednesday — Sun, 07 Aug 2016 09:54:02 GMT

Hi Rach,

Welcome to the forum.

Don't you just hate that feeling of being in a rut, it's horrid. You mentioned being in class what are you doing? James has given you some good information and phone numbers. He asked if your seeing anyone. If not a visit to your GP is a great first step. If you are seeing someone can you get an appointment soon to work through what's happening for you?

Please reach out, neither anxiety and/or depression are fun and you could do with some support. Do you have anyone close by you can talk to? It's hard but not impossible this moment will change and it will get better. Make sure you are looking after yourself and doing things that you enjoy.

If your up to it let us know how you are going.

Best wishes

I'm new here: Depressed, anxious and lonely

Rachh1492 — Mon, 08 Aug 2016 04:31:40 GMT

I'm not really sure what has triggered it, 2/3 years ago I was going through bullying and I did try and harm myself but I thought I was getting better but it's just got worse this year. I'm pushing the people that love me away and it hurts a lot 😞

I'm new here: Depressed, anxious and lonely

Rachh1492 — Mon, 08 Aug 2016 04:34:40 GMT

Yes I hate the feeling of being stuck in a rut. I'm in high school, still, unfortunately. I'm not seeing anyone at the moment. I'm talking to my friends and support network but as I said to James, I'm pushing them away because I don't want to bother them

i'll let you know how I'm going.

thanks 😭

I'm new here: Depressed, anxious and lonely

Wednesday — Mon, 08 Aug 2016 05:07:57 GMT

HI Rach,

I get that when you feel low it's easy to become more insular, but try to reach out. Maybe you don't want to feel like a burden to your friends and people can get frustrated with us whew are not in a great space. It is hard to pull your socks cup when you feel like this, is there a school counsellor you can talk to?

Come back and vent anytime.Good luck. x

I'm new here: Depressed, anxious and lonely

Rachh1492 — Mon, 08 Aug 2016 08:37:06 GMT

I isolate myself terribly, and it just hurts me, and people around me. There is a school counsellor and I have talked to him a few times, I just don't feel comfortable 😕

Rach X

I'm new here: Depressed, anxious and lonely

Wednesday — Mon, 08 Aug 2016 23:19:41 GMT

Hi Rach,

You have some really good insight into yourself, that is gold, good work!

Shame about the school counsellor. I'm sorry that you were bullied that must have been a dreadful experience. I can remember the same thing happening to me when I was at school, it hurts a lot. Stupid, pathetic, uneducated, people who do they think they are!

Who else is there around that you could reach out too. Are mum and dad around to talk to? What about the GP can you go there alone?

You asked what helps with depression, have a look around the site there's lots of information on here. And I know this is going to sound twee but it does help to exercise, not maniacally though. If you can get, a twenty minute walk most days would help. Some social contact is important too. Why do you think you are pushing people away at the moment?

What if you try to do just one thing each day that makes you feel good, walk the dog or cat, call a friend and tell them you would like to catch up, read a funny story, meditate, whatever makes you feel good?

Do you want too share some more about what has been happening for you recently? No pressure.

Here's a hug. You will feel better this is just a moment in time. xx

I'm new here: Depressed, anxious and lonely

james1 — Mon, 08 Aug 2016 23:30:26 GMT

Hey Rach,

I don't want to add much more to Wednesday's great suggestions - just wanted to say that I've been reading your posts, and I wanted to send you hugs to help you through this.

Every hill, no matter how steep, has a peak and you will see the other side!

James

I'm new here: Depressed, anxious and lonely

Rachh1492 — Tue, 09 Aug 2016 13:40:08 GMT

My sister and law knows what's going on, and I can't go to the GP alone till I'm 16. I've tried excercise, and that does help. I couldn't tell you why, but I think it's something to do with feeling like a burden to my friends and family. I try and do something positive everyday, but the negatives always over run them. There's nothing much else too it. I'm struggling with friendships at school, my grades, boys, peer pressure and just the normal teenage issues.

Thank you for your support xxx

I'm new here: Depressed, anxious and lonely

Rachh1492 — Tue, 09 Aug 2016 13:41:12 GMT

Thank you, it means a lot, even to have support from a stranger xx

I'm new here: Depressed, anxious and lonely

Wednesday — Thu, 11 Aug 2016 03:09:17 GMT

Hi Rach,

I am sorry that you are struggling with so many areas of your life at the moment. It's great that you SiL knows can you spend some more time with her? Maybe see a movie or go for a walk, do something rather than deep and meaningful conversations, try to talk about her as well as you, then your not being burden but sharing.

When we are low and as your feeling now our brains trick us into thinking odd things, like we are not loveable, no one likes us etc. Being teenager is pretty tough too, all those hormones playing tricks on us too, agh!

Don't forget your mum and dad do love you. They may be too busy with their own lives to have noticed how you are feeling or be putting it down to.. who knows what. Parents are human too. Can you try to reach out to them? Tell them that you need hug and a chat maybe?

If you don't want to talk to your mum or dad?? What if you tell the one you feel closest to that you would like to see a doctor and that while your not comfortable talking about why at the moment you will tell them later?

You will get through this, hugs, xx

I'm new here: Depressed, anxious and lonely

Rachh1492 — Fri, 12 Aug 2016 13:43:00 GMT

Hi,

i try and spend as much time with her as I can. She has a little baby so it's quite hard to get time to do things. But we do have fun.

With my parents - They do know what's going on but not the severity of it. They know I'm struggling at school and the stress from it. Honestly I'm just not comfortable.

I'm going to see a doctor with my sister and law once I'm 16, and my best friends also know what's going on and suggest professional help.

I hope so, thank you.

Xxx

I'm new here: Depressed, anxious and lonely

Wednesday — Sat, 13 Aug 2016 04:54:25 GMT

Hi Rach,

I'm so pleased the you can spend time with your sister in law, aren't babies just the cutest things. You don't have to answer but how long is it until you turn 16?

It's great that your parents know you're struggling but sad that they don't understand the extent of your sufferring. Do you know what it is that makes you feel uncomfortable talking to your parents in a little more depth?

Your friends sound like they are on your team, which given your earlier posts is a great thing. Good friends that are honest with you are just golden. Even better than a boy a lot of the time, hang on to those friends.

Truly you will feel better, just take one step at a time. I know it's corny but every great journey has to start with a step. You have made some strides and are doing some really good things. Reaching out to your SIL and letting your friends in on what is happening for you are fabulous examples of you making a change.

One day you will look back at this time, it won't last forever.

Hugs, xx

I'm new here: Depressed, anxious and lonely

Rachh1492 — Mon, 15 Aug 2016 03:43:36 GMT

I am 16 in September, so not long....

I'm not sure what makes me uncomfortable to talk to my parents, I think it's the feeling of being a disappointment.

I'm hanging onto those friendships because I'm struggling with boys at the moment.

i hope so 😕

I'm new here: Depressed, anxious and lonely

james1 — Mon, 15 Aug 2016 03:55:36 GMT

Hey Rach,

Not long to go and I'm sure you'll be really relieved to have stuck it out when you do turn 16 and get to see a doctor.

In terms of speaking to your parents, I understand what you mean by feeling like a disappointment. They can be our harshest critic, and often their opinion is the one that really feels like it matters.

So I would also suggest talking to your parents if you feel comfortable. If you feel it could be harmful to you if you talk to them, don't talk to them yet. If you're just afraid of talking to them because their opinion matters a lot to you and you don't know what they'll say, I think it's worth giving them the benefit of the doubt. As Wednesday pointed out earlier, they do love you but they may not understand, so you might need to be patient with them.

Still it sounds like you have a good support network in your friends, so don't be afraid to lean on them a bit. Do you get time to catch up with them on the weekends?

James

I'm new here: Depressed, anxious and lonely

Wednesday — Mon, 15 Aug 2016 03:56:20 GMT

Dear Rach,

You are not a disappointment. You're young and confused. Being a teenager can be really tricky and most of us remember some tough times. Boys, there is a reason someone wrote book called men are from Mars and women are from Venus. Some how we figure out a way of coexisting and making it work together. Your time will come don't worry too much about the boys, but do be true to yourself. This time in your life is about learning to understand the boys and yourself.

Your parents are probably confused wondering what is happening to their gorgeous girl. Don't ever forget they love you. They may not be good at or to busy to pick up on subtle stuff.

Roll on September. Are you doing anything for your birthday?

Maybe in the meantime you can think a little more about talking to one of your parents?

Truly, one day you will look back at this time, it won't last forever.

I'm new here: Depressed, anxious and lonely

Rachh1492 — Wed, 17 Aug 2016 03:28:14 GMT

I don't want to talk to my parents about it, it's just not something I want to experience. I do catch up with my friends sometimes but I don't often feel up to it because I feel like a burden on them and I'd not be fun enough.

I'm new here: Depressed, anxious and lonely

Rachh1492 — Wed, 17 Aug 2016 03:31:23 GMT

Yeah, I'm not allowed to do anything for my birthday, my parents have said... And I'm trying to forget about boys at the moment 😕

I'm new here: Depressed, anxious and lonely

james1 — Wed, 17 Aug 2016 03:59:53 GMT

Hi Rach,

I understand and that's completely okay. Your feelings are true and valid, so if you don't feel safe doing something, you don't have to.

All you need to remember is that feelings are temporary. So what feels scary and unassailable now, won't always be that way.

One day, you will feel okay talking to your family and friends. One day, you will feel like catching up with your friends and they'll be glad to have you back on board. In fact, they're probably hoping that you'll join them now because that's why they're friends - to help you when you need help, and to be helped by you when they need help.

I think it's great that you're focussing on yourself right now and not worrying about boys. That's a really intelligent thing to do.

You're walking a pretty dark path and things won't magically get better in September. But you're doing the right thing and we're here to hold your hand as you find your way in the dark.

Perhaps you could find something quiet to do with some friends...watch a movie perhaps? Go for a cycle in the park? Just having company can do wonders for our general mood.

James