topic Re: Wife has serious delusions after mania and refuses medication in Supporting family and friends

Wife has serious delusions after mania and refuses medication

Little — Wed, 10 Jun 2026 07:11:08 GMT

My wife came out of a manic phase about a week ago. This was only the second manic phase she has had in our marriage of over twenty years. The previous one was over 15 years ago and for the last 15 years, we've led a relatively normal life, with her free from medication.

This time, she was involuntarily hospitalized, which traumatized her and made her incredibly angry. She blames me indirectly for this. Her previous manic phase came after 7 years of psychiatric treatment for depression. She suffered from strong side-effects during this time and from the medication they gave her for mania and this made her become strongly against western medication of all kinds. She doesn't even take Panadol.

So, this time around, she reluctantly took medication while in hospital but has not taken any since leaving. There is zero chance of me convincing her to do so or convince her that she is ill. In her mind, she is channelling and is on line.

She now does not have mania, but retains very strong delusions that there is an evil organisation out to get her. She believes they are monitoring her flat and around half the city are employed to watch her and trick her, including cleaners and members of the public.

She has zero tendency to self-harm, but she is impossible to live with (we now live apart but see each other daily). Also, it's becoming a problem when she confronts someone sitting next to us in a restaurant in the belief they are a spy sent to watch her. Having said that, she normally leaves when she feels threatened and she isn't a physical threat to anyone. She did leave her flat at 4am this morning to walk the streets because she believed the flat was haunted. She also keeps on throwing her phone away because she thinks she is being tracked.

Forced hospitalization is not an option because that would push her towards self-harm and giving up the will to live. This is one thing she has voiced very clearly. I see our only option at this stage as being me monitoring her while she "rides it out." In her previous manic phase, the delusions eventually disappeared without medication over time, but that was.very tough going

I crash read, 'I am not sick. I don't need help" over the past week, which details how to use LEAP. I've tried this, but am well away from being able to coax her to take medication as a "partner."

Any ideas would be appreciated.

Re: Wife has serious delusions after mania and refuses medication

Croix — Wed, 10 Jun 2026 13:30:55 GMT

Dear Little~

I'd like to welcome you here and hope you find it helps you. Your wife is lucky to have a partner with your pacience, care and wisdom.

There are very many people who have serious mental issues but do not believe there is anything wrong. That is the difficulty sadly you face, to try to get the best treatment from an adult who will not have a bar of it

Altohgh you believe your wife is no longer 'manic' it is obvious something is very wrong, with distrust and 'paranoid' thoughts and reactions. Now being at the stage you can no longer live together even though you see each other daily.

You may be right about the downside of hospitalization, though I can speak from expereince it is not all bad. While I realise you think it might make your wife's distrust of the medical profession worse the reason for treatment is to try to get rid of that imbalance in her thoughts. I'm no doctor so dunno what is right.

It made all the difference to a member of my family who was suffering paranoid thoughts.

Although I'm not familiar with LEAP I'm sure the path it sets out is the only one open to you unless you call in a CATT team and try to convince them your wife is incapable of looking after herself.

To listen to her points of view and not argue and point out her beliefs are wrong, even though you know they are, will lower the animosity and need to argue. If she is freighted of someone get up with her and move away from them, even though you know there is not real threat. Instead showing empathy and understanding about what she believes and she is going though. Try to get her over time to see you as someone she can always trust, a friend.

Perhaps if you are lucky enough to reach that position you will be in a better place to suggest therapy.

It is a very stressful time for you, and I'm wondering if you are going it alone or have some form of support, either counceling, or maybe a family member or friend?

If you would like to come back and talk more you will be very welcome, I suspect it may take some time

Croix

Re: Wife has serious delusions after mania and refuses medication

Little — Thu, 11 Jun 2026 08:00:19 GMT

I really appreciate your reply Croix.

Yes, as you said, I probably should have taken the lead in taking her elsewhere to eat when the people sat down.

Today is the first day that I haven't seen her. I can see from our bank records that she has checked into a hotel, probably because she thinks the flat is being monitored.

At least I can call her there. I'm planning on giving her another mobile tomorrow and showing her how to turn it off when she is in fear of being followed instead of simply throwing the phone away.

Thanks again. I appreciate that someone has listened and can understand what we are both going through.