topic Healthy relationship after experiencing domestic violence in Relationship and family issues

Healthy relationship after experiencing domestic violence

littleboo — Mon, 15 Nov 2021 01:56:17 GMT

I finally left a domestic violence relationship after years of trying to escape, which almost cost me my life. i ended up in hospital in the psych ward and met a really nice guy there that is understanding, considerate, caring and all the things i am not used to. he is so amazing and we are good for each other but i am struggling with this new type of relationship as i am so used to the turbulent ways of my exes, its almost like i am struggling to stay interested and fighting urges to self sabotage. i really like this guy and i know its is healthy and what i deserve but i my feelings of low self worth are still prevalent and its hard to let myself be loved the way i deserve. has anyone had a similar experience?

Healthy relationship after experiencing domestic violence

HappyHelper88 — Mon, 15 Nov 2021 02:25:34 GMT

Hello littleboo, Thankyou for your post.

Im so glad to hear you have left and you are safe now and I believe everything happens for a reason....Could be fate that you met.

I left a toxic DV relationship myself and when I finally met a good guy I had trouble adjusting I assumed he would also look through my phone everyday and do other things but he didn't
Its like you almost get bored because your so used to being around drama and being on edge it took me over a year to learn how to love and be loved healthily

So yes I have had a similar experience and yes it is hard it all worth it in the end my pscyh helped me a lot to understand everything

I hope this helps 🙂

Healthy relationship after experiencing domestic violence

Sophie_M — Mon, 15 Nov 2021 03:34:12 GMT

Hey littleboo,

Welcome to the forums, and thank you for sharing such a brave and honest post with us here. Hopefully hearing from the lovely HappyHelper brings you some comfort.

We wanted to check in and let you know that if you'd like to talk this through with a counsellor, we're here for you on 1300 22 4636. Our lovely counsellors will be able to talk this through with you, and can also recommend some next steps for getting a bit more support.

There's also a couple of pages on the Beyond Blue site you might like to look at:

This previous thread has some
ideas for self-care that work for really challenging times, as well as any other time.
The Blue Knot foundation's pages on self-care for survivors of trauma have some great techniques for coping with complex feelings and challenging negative self-talk.
If you feel like you could use a bit more support, but you're not sure how to get there, this page might be handy.

Thanks again for sharing here Littleboo. It's a great step on the path towards feeling better.

Kind regards,

Sophie M