topic What is it like to call a helpline? in Treatments, health professionals and therapies

What is it like to call a helpline?

Willow Jude — Mon, 06 Jun 2022 11:49:00 GMT

Hi there,

I’m wondering what it is like to call a helpline. My psychologist has recommended I consider calling one during times when I am struggling with some overwhelming feelings (not necessarily suicide/self-harm related, more like intense hopelessness, loneliness, etc.), but I find it difficult not knowing what to expect. There are so many things that I worry about when I consider calling - How will the conversation go? Will they think it's okay for me to use a helpline just to talk to someone when I am not a risk to myself? Will I be made to feel like I am wasting their time after a certain amount of time? Can I be forced to go to hospital or something if I am considered at risk of harm?

So if anyone has any experiences with helplines that they’d be willing to share to give me a little insight into how it goes, I would really appreciate it!

Thanks,
WJ

What is it like to call a helpline?

Sophie_M — Mon, 06 Jun 2022 12:29:18 GMT

Hi Willow_Jude

Welcome to the Beyond Blue forums we are so glad that you have made you way here and had the bravery to post. We want you to know that this is a safe space to discuss your thoughts, feelings and experiences and receive honest responses and suggestions from fellow forum users.

In addition to posting in the forums, we also invite you to call or chat to one of our trained mental health professionals (when you feel safe to do so) who will also be able to listen and offer care; it’s completely confidential and available 24/7: To call us, contact 1300 22 4636
To use webchat, Click Here

Thank you again for joining this community, we hope that you can join other conversations that resonate with you and read about other users and their journey to better mental health.

Kind regards,

Sophie M

What is it like to call a helpline?

romantic_thi3f — Tue, 07 Jun 2022 00:24:17 GMT

Hi Willow Jude,

Thank you for your question and I'm really looking forward to hearing what our members have to share. I'm a little cliche in that I recommend a lot of helplines but get too afraid or forget to ring them 🙂

I have however rang Kids Helpline in the past, and also messaged them but also texted and had an online chat with Lifeline. The process of the chat is the same, so that's why I'm jumping in.

First off, I want to share that you won't bug them or bother them by ringing, because they are there to take your call and listen to what you have to say. You don't have to be at risk of harm. Sometimes, people just want someone to talk too.

They might start of the conversation by asking things such as "What do you want to talk about today?" "Have you contacted x before?" "How can I help?" So just giving you the chance to share what's going on for you, and no pressure to share if there's something you're not comfortable with.

If you are at risk of harm, then they do have a duty of care, but the way they'll respond is based on the 'level of risk'. So this can vary to 'Sometimes I don't care if I wake up or not in the morning' all the way to 'I am going to kill myself tomorrow at 10am'. There's a big spectrum! So it might be chatting about ways to cope or ways to stay safe.

It also depends on the hotline that you ring. Beyond Blue might be a resource if you want someone to chat too, where as Lifeline is a better resource if you're having suicidal thoughts or thoughts of harm. There's also lots of other hotlines such as The Butterfly Foundation and Kids Helpline (up til the age of 25).

I hope this answers your questions and isn't too overwhelming!

What is it like to call a helpline?

Not_Batman — Tue, 07 Jun 2022 02:26:10 GMT

Hi WJ,

Having been in contact, I guess i can only say what i have encountered.

For example, with Lifeline, it starts with a recorded message. I think it asks you to make a selection, or if you are in immediate need, then call 000. You’ll be placed in a queue, but i haven't experienced a long wait time.

the operator will answer, and ask how they can help…this is when i just let it all out. The operator listened, and offered encouragement, and empathy, as well as some dialog to help me get through my panic attack.
the operator will ask you some questions, similar to what your psychologist might ask.

i found the beyond blue webchat to be conducted in very much the same way, only a little less personal because there is no voice. It was a bit of a strain on the thumbs from typing on the phone.

Im both cases i never felt that i was taking up their time unnecessarily, i was in need of help and they provided that to help get me through the moment.

I hope that gives you some ease.

Not_Batman

What is it like to call a helpline?

Willow Jude — Tue, 07 Jun 2022 08:37:50 GMT

Thank you so much for your responses romantic_thi3f and Not_Batman, I really appreciate you both taking the time to respond. Your answers have been super helpful in addressing my concerns and making me feel more confident about the possibility of contacting a helpline in the future. Thanks! 🙂

What is it like to call a helpline?

Eagle Ray — Tue, 07 Jun 2022 09:26:10 GMT

Hi Willow Jude,

I contacted Lifeline once late last year and once early this year, which is the first time I’d contacted any kind of helpline. Like you I had hesitated to call previously. I wasn’t suicidal but was experiencing quite extreme despair and was totally overwhelmed by the events in my life.

What happened in both calls was I just offloaded everything I was feeling, something I normally never do with people. I normally don’t let people know if I am feeling things like despair, but because it is a line you can call in crisis I think that’s what gave me permission to just let it all out and express exactly what I was feeling.

Both people I spoke to did not speak a lot but just let me talk, but were empathetic. So I think it helped as a pressure relief valve for overwhelming feelings as much as anything. Both calls went for about half an hour. So if you are feeling overwhelmed it can just be a way of releasing some of that.

Only a couple of days ago I contacted the Beyond Blue helpline. I was not despairing, just trying to sort something, and it was a very down to earth, practical conversation with an understanding person and that gave me some strength and encouragement. I felt heartened and positive afterwards.

I hope that helps. Take care and all the best.

What is it like to call a helpline?

Willow Jude — Tue, 07 Jun 2022 11:15:21 GMT

Thanks so much Eagle Ray, your response definitely helps a lot! I'm glad to hear that you were able to work through what was on your mind with the assistance of the helplines 🙂

What is it like to call a helpline?

geoff — Tue, 07 Jun 2022 19:44:16 GMT

Hello Willow Jude, I did reply back to you but it hasn't appeared, I'm sorry.

Geoff.

What is it like to call a helpline?

David35 — Wed, 08 Jun 2022 13:38:05 GMT

I've used lifeline a few times and the Cancer Council once. I usually start with "I'm not sure where to start". They tend to put your mind at ease by saying something like "That's how these conversations usually begin". They just listen, given some general guidance. The phone calls lasted about 5 minutes just until my mind stopped racing and the despair left me. Allowed me to think more calmly and then make a decision.

Hope this helps.

What is it like to call a helpline?

geoff — Wed, 08 Jun 2022 16:39:29 GMT

Hello Willow Jude, my experience is that I once rang a helpline in desperation, talked with a person who was very understanding, however, as the conversation continued they knew that I needed immediate help and rang the ambulance who arrived at my house, without me giving them any details, and then taken to a hospital for my own safety.

Another time I was talking with my ex on the phone who then rang 000 and again I was taken to a hospital.

Whether or not I was talking or just venting to them, they have the opportunity to ring those concerned, but I never wanted to go because I had my puppie to look after and that worried me more.

Take care of yourself.

Geoff.

What is it like to call a helpline?

Willow Jude — Wed, 15 Jun 2022 12:28:15 GMT

Thank you for your responses David35 and Geoff, I really appreciate you taking the time to contribute! Your responses have helped to give me more of an understanding of the experience of calling a helpline 🙂

What is it like to call a helpline?

Rebel_Mudlark — Sat, 25 Jun 2022 11:27:45 GMT

From personal experience (maybe half a dozen calls over the past few years): basically make sure you're not a risk to yourself, and if not, only listen to you, or maybe tell you to find a psychologist and/or psychiatrist. It's fairly common across all of them: they can't really tell you where to get help, but they can't really do much for you if you have any mental health issue. I would advise skipping things and finding a therapist, instead of just having someone else tell you the same thing?

What is it like to call a helpline?

mmMekitty — Sat, 25 Jun 2022 12:45:55 GMT

Hello, Willow_Jude, 😺Sorry, my only brief experience with phoning a helpline was, for me, not so great - but I think that was me: me being too impatient to want to go through waiting for the call to be answered, then answering the questions.

I also would like to say, "Hello Rebel Mudlark, welcome to the forums"😺I get a feeling I might feel similarly to you. I don't like being asked a lot of rote questions, most of which will have nothing to do with why I might phone. & if they are inflexible about getting answers to these questions, I'd just get cranky.

So, Willow_Jude, I hope my only experience with phoning a helpline was not typical.

I understand asking someone to answer a couple questions could help the person I've called get a general idea of who they are talking to, &, if the caller is finding it hard to begin speaking, then a couple questions could help start the conversation. Not a dozen or so. Of-course, they need to know if callers are at high risk or not, up front. Definitely duty of care there. But I thought some of the questions could have waited until the answer became relevant, as the conversation progressed.

That's how I'd like it to be anyway.

Warmly,

Oh did I tell you how much I like your big beautiful sunflower, with the blue sky? 😺

mmMekitty

Re: What is it like to call a helpline?

Willow Jude — Sat, 30 Jul 2022 10:51:44 GMT

Thanks Rebel_Mudlark and mmMekitty, I appreciate you both taking the time to respond and providing your honest insights into the topic. It helps to have a well-rounded understanding of everyone's experiences 🙂

To give a bit of an update - I did call a helpline last night to try and get some help working through some overwhelming emotions. Unfortunately they were somewhat busy and I gave up after being on hold for quite a while, which was a disappointing outcome, but I am also viewing it as a good first step for me.

Re: What is it like to call a helpline?

Willow Jude — Sun, 30 Apr 2023 09:50:42 GMT

So I tried using a counselling service web chat tonight and, just like last year with the helpline, I had a long wait and ended up giving up. I'm definitely not trying to blame the service because I know being busy is beyond their control, and there must be lots of people needing assistance who I'm glad are getting help, and waits are always going to be long on a weekend evening, so it's not their fault. At the same time (- I'm trying to remember to use my dialectics here! -), I am experiencing frustration and disappointment at the situation, which I think it's okay to feel without blaming anyone or wanting them to feel bad.

I am feeling a bit better than when I initially reached out for support so we'll see if I am able to improve my night without assistance. I also know that what happened tonight doesn't mean that all potential experiences with helplines/support services in the future are guaranteed to be negative, and I did have an alright experience with a helpline last year which does give me some hope.

Re: What is it like to call a helpline?

sbella02 — Sun, 30 Apr 2023 14:08:32 GMT

Willow Jude,

Thank you for reaching out again and sharing your experience, even though it was a frustrating one for you. I'm so sorry that this has been your experience with a helpline, I can understand your frustration.

It's good to see that this hasn't tarnished your view of helplines in general, that's a great perspective to take. Whenever I've called Lifeline (I've called a few times) they tended to be pretty fast to respond, so I'd say it depends on the day, demand, etc.

Do you think you would reach out again? If you'd feel comfortable sharing, which one/s have you tried?

Take care, SB

Re: What is it like to call a helpline?

Eagle Ray — Mon, 08 May 2023 08:28:28 GMT

Hi Willow Jude,

I’m sorry you’ve had these long waits a couple of times now. It’s understandable that would be very frustrating when you’re already feeling vulnerable. You may be a bit unlucky as I’ve made a few calls to both Lifeline and the BB helpline and I’ve only had a short wait at most.

If you do try again and get through hopefully you will get a helpful person. In most cases I have except for one person who was very intense and was drilling me with questions that I couldn’t answer. I had to end the call, calm myself and then I called again and got someone who was absolutely lovely and I felt so much better afterwards.

So it’s important to try to not take on additional stress from the call/chat if the person’s approach is not working for you. Recognise it is within your power to reach out until you get someone wise and supportive. I have found some people don’t say much and mostly let you talk, and others are more interactive and engaging.

Hope you are feeling better,

Re: What is it like to call a helpline?

sbella02 — Sun, 14 May 2023 10:51:51 GMT

ER, I like this contribution. Much like with any professional, if you find that you're not keen on their style of working with you, finding somebody else that you gel with better is a good idea, otherwise it can add to your stress.