topic Where is your safe space? in Staying well

Where is your safe space?

Guest_1643 — Sat, 06 Mar 2021 11:28:43 GMT

Do you have a happy place? A place where you can exhale, and feel okay, if just for a moment?

Is it your backyard, or a shed you work in? Is it at the gym? Do u breathe a sigh of relief when you close the door to your therapists office, knowing you can talk about ur life without inhibition?

When I was 22 I became a gym-junkie. I went to a gym that was mostly older people and wasn't about body-pride but was truly about being fit and strong. I used to love going there, zoning out, and reading magazines or watching music videos on the gym tvs. I think it was important to have a phsyical place that I felt welcomed and okay. The gym trainers all knew me and told me I was doing great at my regimen... it was a warm place to go and I went often. It was safe.

What's ur fave happy space?

Where is your safe space?

Guest_342 — Sat, 06 Mar 2021 12:13:42 GMT

In my garden 🙂

Where is your safe space?

blondguy — Sat, 06 Mar 2021 12:24:03 GMT

Hi Sleepy21

Thankyou for the great thread!

Landscaping/Gardening this steep block I live on....I find peace in caring for the earth we live on
Being able to close the door to the Beyond Blue forums and watch a good movie
Having my cell phone switched off is wonderful safe place when I need some peace

my kindest always

Paul

Where is your safe space?

Guest_1643 — Sat, 06 Mar 2021 13:02:53 GMT

yay lots of great gardening and nature connection - you guys are awesome connecting to the earth and showing love and kindness to plants...

I have found comfort in having a pet to care for when i would pet-sit - that was such a happy zone for me. Building trust with an animal is so nurturing.

A safe place is so important to my recovery.

Where is your safe space?

Unbeliever — Sat, 06 Mar 2021 13:54:33 GMT

Using the initial thread title...

My "safe place" is in a very select few peoples company. It is not a "place" as such.

My happy place? That's more difficult. I'm not entirely sure if I have one. At least not anymore.

Where is your safe space?

Guest_1643 — Sat, 06 Mar 2021 14:12:55 GMT

hey unbeliever... i don't have a happy place either...i identify also more with the idea of a safe place

happy is a lot for me too. Thanks for drawing that distinction.

I think sometimes in society ppl talk about "safe spaces" these days and it makes sense to me how important it is to feel safe.

The point about ppl creating a safe space is very much how i feel too.

Where is your safe space?

mocha delight — Sat, 06 Mar 2021 15:23:08 GMT

I don’t have a “safe place”

Where is your safe space?

geoff — Sat, 06 Mar 2021 16:27:23 GMT

Hello Sleepy, a lovely thread you've created.

The place we treasure as our 'safe space' may change daily, hourly or weekly when suffering from this illness, depending on the situation we are currently facing, for example, it might be the garden but then the house is sold for a specific reason, then we lose interest in the garden because of the disappointment it's caused and now does not seem to find the serenity we're looking for, so we have to find something else.

There is a certain importance of having a ‘happy place’ and know that it's safe and be able to go there frequently or when the time arises, but if for any reason this is taken away from us can cause emotional and perhaps physical problems that will relate back to our condition.

The place I found to be safe was potting around in my shed or fixing something up, major or minor in the house before it was sold, this may mean, removing a wall or installing a spa, although hard work I found it to be comfortable and when I feel like this, it's a safe place to be for me.

Best wishes.

Geoff.

Where is your safe space?

amberlite — Sun, 07 Mar 2021 06:57:43 GMT

my safe space is here, I put my trust in you all and I benefit. It is important to find a space that allows me to express my issues without fear. best wishes to all in finding peace

Where is your safe space?

Guest_1643 — Sun, 07 Mar 2021 08:58:00 GMT

good point amberlite that we also put our trust in a place and let our guard down in that place.

i do it very gradually over time opening up and allowing someone or somewhere to exist as a safe place. thank u amber

Where is your safe space?

TheBigBlue — Sun, 07 Mar 2021 10:08:04 GMT

My safe place is my home. It’s the one place I want to be when I am anywhere else.

I like the upstairs lounge, it’s gets the winter sunshine & the window looks out onto the street. Its also a GREAT spot for a nap.

My other safe place is in the car with my boyfriend. We love road trips together & im always happy if we are in the car going somewhere.

He is like me, we don’t need non-stop conversation & are content with long periods of silence. By that I mean they aren’t uncomfortable silences. I tend to get lost in my own thoughts. Sometimes we sing along with the radio. We always make a point of going to see “big things” when we road trip eg the Big Banana in Coffs Harbour. So every trip, he will research & & find these big things & make sure our route takes us past them. We are going on a 5 night road trip this week, I will report back on how exciting the viewing of the “big lawn bowl” goes, which will be visited on this road trip 😉🤣

Where is your safe space?

Guest_1643 — Sun, 07 Mar 2021 10:25:41 GMT

hi the BigBlue

i'm picturing a really safe feeling, private and open upstairs lounge, that envelopes you from the world

thank u for sharing

i love ur descriptions of ur safe place and of ur relationship

Where is your safe space?

Guest_1643 — Sun, 07 Mar 2021 11:04:06 GMT

I have in the past had a therapist/social worker who was very caring and was my safe person for many years. I'm grateful to her. I met her when i was just 19 and she helped me become an adult and seperate from my family.

I think a safe person is also one where u feel no fear of rejection - u have this core belief that they are part of u and care for u, and want to support u through whatever ups and downs life brings.

Where is your safe space?

Doolhof — Sun, 07 Mar 2021 12:30:09 GMT

I feel safest surrounded by nature where there is little noise created by human interventions.

I feel at peace at the beach, in a forest, sitting on a rock in a paddock, dangling my feet in a creek.

I've heard of the idea where you can calm your mind, meditate and imagine a safe place you can take yourself to when ever you need to.

When I am feeling anxious, I can shut my eyes for a moment and take myself to a safe place.

Where is your safe space?

Guest_1643 — Sun, 07 Mar 2021 12:40:16 GMT

hi geoff

u make some great points about safe spaces changing.
I envy a bit ppl who can work with their hands and immerse in creating something

Safety can be the association. I don't feel safe at university at the moment, because of some events there... but for others that may be a safe place. It's a giving idea because it's so personal. What is safe and where can be feel that sense of peace and letting go?

Where is your safe space?

Guest_1643 — Sun, 07 Mar 2021 12:41:08 GMT

dools you're awesome, thank u so much.

nature, the beach, and an internal peaceful place... so centred... thank u for ur awesome post.

Where is your safe space?

Doolhof — Sun, 07 Mar 2021 12:50:19 GMT

Hi Sleepy,

Thanks, I appreciate your kind words.

It has helped me immensely many times to think of a safe and calming place to be even if I can't physically be there, I can be in my mind.

You mentioned the University does not feel safe due to some experiences there. Is it possible to find a quiet place somewhere at Uni where you do feel okay, sit for a moment and consider what may be a safe place for you in your mind. You can keep your eyes open and still think of a peaceful place.

Or maybe have a picture you can carry around with you of a safe place.

Hope you find some ways to feel safer at University. Another action that has helped me feel more empowered and safe is to walk with a bold step with my head help high and chest out...well sort of out! Like owning the place where you are at to aid inner strength.

Cheers to you Sleepy and all reading from Dools

Where is your safe space?

Guest_1643 — Sun, 07 Mar 2021 12:55:49 GMT

hi Dools

love the idea of a picture... i am working towards returning there and feeling safe there. I had a traumatic incident or series of incidents occur there. I was also homeless for a few nights and I think I slept in one of the buildings...this happens sometimes... but it's hard for me to remember all of that. It's not easy. I think I would do some exposure therapy probably in parts. I guess if you are in a different head space, a previously unsafe space could feel safe... but then, there are triggers.

I'm so impressed you were able to access a safe space to help you and carry with u mentally. It's an amazing tool. Hugs!

Where is your safe space?

Hereforsupport — Sun, 07 Mar 2021 13:55:35 GMT

I don’t have a safe place. Leaving my house is my safe place. Coming home is a nightmare.

Where is your safe space?

geoff — Sun, 07 Mar 2021 14:12:57 GMT

Hello Hereforsupport, it's always sad to see a comment like what you have posted, and hopefully we maybe able to offer some assistance and help to you.

Take care.

Geoff.