topic i could really use some company in Staying well

i could really use some company

startingnew — Sat, 05 Aug 2017 09:48:54 GMT

Right now id really like some company, jsut to sit with me.
i dont like asking for help but tonight i really need it
all of yesterday i spent with a sick horse trying to save her (vet treatements, mum ringing around for a vet yesterday, me ringing today and in less than 24 hr ive done over 7 hours walking- the condition she had can sometimes cure it) and today all morning since 5am until 12 today i was trying to save her again but despite the best efforts of myself, mum and the vets she sadly had to be put to sleep today. my mother couldnt handle it so i watched my horse be put to sleep stayed with her until the angels came for her and then get buried.
im completely heartbroken
and right now i really could use some company

i could really use some company

Jackson1994 — Sat, 05 Aug 2017 12:40:36 GMT

Hello

im so sorry to hear this

I am here to sit with you ❤️❤️

i could really use some company

TBella — Sat, 05 Aug 2017 12:50:24 GMT

So sorry for your loss.

May you know & feel the love,peace & comfort you need at this time.

Sending you a hug 🤗

Tbella

i could really use some company

Croix — Sat, 05 Aug 2017 12:50:38 GMT

Dear Startingnew~

I'm sorry to say I don't know how long since you posted, hopefully not too long.

Like Jackson I can be here for a little while.

Why don't you say something about your horse, when you got her, what sort of personality she had, things like that.

When we are in this situation it is sometimes possible to forget everything but the right now, however that is only the end of the journey, there is still the start and middle to recall.

Animals latch on to our hearts

Croix

i could really use some company

MsPurple — Sat, 05 Aug 2017 13:01:37 GMT

Hi startingnew. We are all here for you.

You did a really brave thing. Letting your horse go to sleep humanily. It was one of the hardest things I had to do for my childhood dog, but he was in pain and it wasn't getting better. It was the best thing for him. Remember you did what any loving animal parent would do. You are brave and a loving animal parent xx

Croix hit the nail on the head. Animals latch on our hearts. They are so amazing

i could really use some company

CMF — Sat, 05 Aug 2017 22:03:35 GMT

Hi SN,

im so sorry to hear this. Have you seen the 'friendship circle ' thread? I saw you post last night and gathered everyone to hold hands for you but then I couldn't find your thread to tell you 😔. I'm so sorry.

i am glad others found you. The friendship circle has dithered for you.

cmf x

i could really use some company

geoff — Sat, 05 Aug 2017 22:48:28 GMT

hello Startingnew, when we have a pet animal they are always with us, no matter what, they will listen to us in both good and bad times, they never argue with us, they accept what we want to say because they are our soul mates, now and will still be in the future as we remember all those times through and thin when we both enjoyed something together, the joys and when they were too sick but we nurtured back.
I can't say how deeply sorry I feel for you, it is such a terrible time and know exactly how you are feeling, so I share your sorrows for your loss. Geoff.

i could really use some company

Babyboomer — Sat, 05 Aug 2017 22:54:42 GMT

I am so sorry that your beautiful friend has had to leave you. Your heart must be in pain. We're all here to keep you company and care for you as you work through your grief! It's weird that the world seems to go about its business seemingly ignoring our loss, while we come to a full stop! Allow yourself to feel what you feel as you process through your grief. We're right here with you.

Warmest regards and lots of hugs if and as you need them.

i could really use some company

startingnew — Sun, 06 Aug 2017 03:19:07 GMT

Hi Jackson, Tbella, Croix, MsPurple, CMF, Geoff, BabyBoomer

thank you all so much for your kind words and support.

Something about my horse?- ok well she has been in the family for 6 years and taught a few kids to ride while she was with us under the instruction of either myself or mum. She had the funniest personality. She was really respectful but she had a few quirks to her that were funny and you couldnt help but laugh at her. Even as she was sick as she was when I got there and thought she had passed already I called her and she did one of her quirks which was to neigh really loud smilliar to a speedboat in the water we use to call her.

She has left a massive hole in my heart but she has also left some of her behind in the form of memories. Those memories are really hard to remember right now as it reminds me just how much I miss her.

I know the decision was the right one but it still doesnt make it any easier to deal with the loss of her.
I miss her so much and it hurts to miss her. I just want her back.

i dont really know how to deal with these sot of emotions, im struggling with them. i know i just have to let them flow but i cant seem to.

i could really use some company

Croix — Sun, 06 Aug 2017 04:41:39 GMT

Dear Startingnew~

People talk about the one they grieve for because just for a moment they have the thoughts of the past as well as the overwhelming loss of the present in their minds at the same time.

Nothing really works great, but it can help a little, or at least I've found it so. So talking about the rides you did, teaching kids, anything you like could be good

Croix

i could really use some company

kanga_brumby — Sun, 06 Aug 2017 04:48:05 GMT

We are here I can say nothing no words can convey I am just here If needed and if you need to gently punch a chafe bag only gently so you don't break anything.

i could really use some company

startingnew — Sun, 06 Aug 2017 06:31:26 GMT

ok hmm its so hard to think properly. i dont really know what else to say about her.

you said maybe talk about the rides and teaching the kids....

we use to teach a few smaller kids on her just not complete beginners as she did have quite alot of cheek to her so she was the next step up. my sister rode her more than i could as she was a smaller horse and my sisters are younger so they got to ride her more than i did.

but the kids- you couldnt wipe their smiles off their faces becasue they were enjoying themselves too much.

she was 20 when she passed the rainbow bridge. i know she had a good run in life and did so much good for others. i can only hope shes resting peacefully.

i could really use some company

startingnew — Sun, 06 Aug 2017 06:33:02 GMT

thank you Kanga. it means alot that your here, you dont have to really say anything

i could really use some company

Guest_128 — Sun, 06 Aug 2017 11:01:19 GMT

To dear Startingnew,

Im sorry I saw your post straight up and wanted to reach out to you,

What a horrific time you have had. Words just don't cut it.

its going to take time and it will never heel. But it's in your soul,you love animals and you will yet again fall in love with another.

Sorry

Later

i could really use some company

startingnew — Sun, 06 Aug 2017 11:09:23 GMT

Anyone around

I struggling and i dont really know how to handle all this emotion

i could really use some company

Guest_128 — Sun, 06 Aug 2017 11:16:19 GMT

You poor baby ,

It is so bad for you,don't take that away.

Did you know about Dory,just keep swimming.

i could really use some company

Croix — Sun, 06 Aug 2017 12:40:00 GMT

Dear Startingnew~

Yes we are here and understand.

I imagine it would have been a big blow to all in your family, how are your younger sisters? Do they need your comfort too?

Croix

i could really use some company

startingnew — Sun, 06 Aug 2017 22:07:42 GMT

Its so hard Later

What am i suppose to do with it all. Just let it sit there... i tried to do that last night and my heart was pounding so hard and fast i was hoping it wasnt going to bounce out my chest.

My sisters are ok Croix but as usual everyone relies on me so if i loose it then so will they. So ive got to hold myself together

i could really use some company

startingnew — Mon, 07 Aug 2017 00:09:34 GMT

Later you made that just keep swimming song come to my head and its been in there since this morning

i could really use some company

Sophie_M — Mon, 07 Aug 2017 00:29:08 GMT

Hi everyone, this is a duplicate of an ongoing thread here so we're going to close it off.

There are plenty of threads in the BB Social Zone if you're looking for company, please help us keep space for newer member seeking support by using the threads you already have available rather than starting up new ones.