topic You can't force yourself to be HAPPY. in Staying well

You can't force yourself to be HAPPY.

Flick_SnotGrass — Thu, 02 Nov 2017 00:12:25 GMT

I know, I tried

Complicated thing HAPPY

Lots of moving parts, as it were

Sometimes UN-HAPPY is caused by old out of date software running in the back of your mind

It is as if we have been hypnotized by something horrid from the past and we can't seem to shake the trance off

Sometimes UN-HAPPY is caused by not enough hardware in your brain; where part of the physical makeup of your brain can't run Happy software very well

An unresolved concussion or TBI can cause this and it can also be caused by information not flowing well throughout the physical matrix of the brain

...this is becoming a more common complaint as the informational demands of our world speeds up and we ask our brains to do things that they weren't designed to deal with. Dyslexia is a case in point ADD, ADHD too

Sometimes, UN-HAPPY is due to lack of Sun, or nutrients, or lack of exercise, or whatever

Often software, hardware and wetwear all get clustered up into a big jumble together

Big salami HAPPY

Let's face it the pressures of modern living makes UN-HAPPY very common. "What is the point really?" is a common and understandable sentiment these days

but

maybe we CAN improve HAPPY a slice at a time.

Put a dent in misery, as it were.

A book I often get my clients to read is "The Brain's Way of Healing" by Norman Doidge.

This is a great primer on Brain Plasticity, the innate ability our brain's have for rewiring and rapidly healing themselves under the appropriate conditions. Post Traumatic Growth.

Another great book for you to read is "The Woman Who Changed Her Brain" by Barbara Arrowsmith-Young.

She was born with three neurological bottlenecks in her brain ~ her world was shattered from birth.

Her book is about her realization that

a) she could use modern neuroscience to pinpoint the specific locations within her head that were not working properly

b) she could use the Neuro Plastic properties of her brain to help fix her wiring

c) she designed specific exercises that drove traffic through her brain's bottlenecks which caused her brain to respond by adding more physical circuitry.

d) she cured herself

It's OK to say "WOW" at this point

Brain Plasticity is real.

Fortunately there is a growing cadre of "Brain Reprogramming Doctors" who now teach this neurostuff. These are experts in applying neuroscience and BRAIN PLASTICITY to helping people feel HAPPY quickly or sorting out many other emotional or cognitive complaints.

Google Neuroplasticity Scholarly Articles and dig in.

You can't force yourself to be HAPPY.

monkey_magic — Thu, 02 Nov 2017 01:00:50 GMT

Wow,

Thanks for that flick snot grass. Writing your name gives me a laugh. Thanks again 🙂

You can't force yourself to be HAPPY.

Flick_SnotGrass — Thu, 02 Nov 2017 02:20:50 GMT

Hey monkey_magic glad you like the post ... have a GOLD STAR!! .... I'm all about winning this happiness brain game...and I hope you are too

Glad my name makes you laugh monkey_magic, I really don't know why that is ... perfectly ordinary name

{er, um monkey_magic it's spelled SnotGrass actually, capital S capital G all one word "SnotGrass" ... comes from Old Norse means bloody nuisance]

ONWARDS!

for no particularly compelling reason,

Flick SnotGrass

You can't force yourself to be HAPPY.

Guest_128 — Thu, 02 Nov 2017 09:09:04 GMT

Snot is that you?

Far out dude,that's heavy goods you got happening there!

I would like a bit of you inside My fishy head.

You are very smart.

Thanks Snot

Dory

You can't force yourself to be HAPPY.

blondguy — Thu, 02 Nov 2017 12:52:02 GMT

Hey Flick

You have created a great thread here...Love it!

If I may quote something you wrote that rang true with me....

Flick mentioned "Sometimes UN-HAPPY is caused by old out of date software running in the back of your mind"

This is a classic piece of work Flick.....You have just given me a new way of looking at my unhappiness..and my door is always open to new self help strategies/coping mechanisms.....Nice1 Flick 🙂

I understand and agree with brain plasticity...it has mentioned on the forums before and its another way of figuring out our brain function albeit as complex as it is.

Just for your information Flick.....I tried everything known to mankind to reduce my chronic anxiety in the early 1980's to no avail unfortunately. After 13 years of 'self healing' using every natural method known to mankind..it took a tiny dose of AD's to reduce my anxiety by approx 70% in 72 hours after 13 years of serious mental anguish. (Thats just what worked for me and my own situation...and I have always been anti-meds)

My Best....and a great thread too MrF!

Paul

You can't force yourself to be HAPPY.

Flick_SnotGrass — Thu, 02 Nov 2017 21:14:24 GMT

Love you too Dory!!!! Glad you like my stuff.... onwards!!, Snot

You can't force yourself to be HAPPY.

Flick_SnotGrass — Thu, 02 Nov 2017 21:29:07 GMT

blonde guy you made my mourning...thanx for your insights and encouragement.

I'm so glad the AD works...THAT's the important thing....like I tell my clients 'You are the centre of your own healing universe, the rest of us are from Central Casting, so experiment...fail fast, fail often, fail cheap..and as long as you vary your approach with each iteration you WILL succeed' ... like Dory says 'keep swimming'...like Yoda says "DO, there is no try"

You probably noticed that I can get quite stroppy about this whole MH field....I don't want the 'he is functioning as well as can be expected under the circumstances'

sod that

I'm after

BEING BETTER THAN WELL

Tea?

Flick SnotGrass

You can't force yourself to be HAPPY.

blondguy — Tue, 07 Nov 2017 20:55:46 GMT

Hi Flick

I love the Yoda quote....'Do...there is no try'....Excellent

Its easy to feel stroppy where MH is concerned....Especially the various phrases and tags that are given not to mention that Centrelink wont continue to endorse an official medical certificate when someone has clinical depression and/ or the various levels of anxiety that accompany it

I hope today is good to you Flick

Paul

You can't force yourself to be HAPPY.

Flick_SnotGrass — Tue, 07 Nov 2017 22:56:50 GMT

Hey Paul-the blondguy,

Good to see you man.

Glad you like the Yoda quote: I live by it. That, and Dory's.

Can I vent?

Please?

Thanx.

Picking up on your "Its easy to feel stroppy where MH is concerned" quote, I had a new client referred to me yesterday....he's a full fledged MD, nice guy, experiencing horrendous depression and anxiety...guess what his speciality is?

Yup, you guessed it MENTAL HEALTH.

I said to him 'Doctor don't you find it the least bit ironic and even a bit funny that you are an MD in Mental Health seeking help?' I didn't say, "doesn't your shit work?" but I didn't have to. He did.

THE SYSTEM IS BROKE.

We need a rethink lads.

Time to chuck the pieces in the air.

Get rid of the old unworkable paradigms and self serving models.

Scrub out our beliefs systems and re synthesis what we think we're doing here.

Told you I needed a good vent.

Paul I saw your post just as I come back from a long walk, where I was contemplating just this idea THE APPROPRIATE POTENTIAL UNITs OF ANALYSIS IN MENTAL HEALTH. In particular POTENTIAL UNITs OF ANALYSIS as pertains to US HUMAN BEING'S WELLBEING. You will see around us, many very fine scientists, each of whom is examining this amazing thing we all wear, I call Brian.

It's a joke.

[I know you know, A Merry Cans often don't.]

Where was I?

Oh yes.

I constantly remind my Boffin Peers:

"Your focus and your beliefs will in large measure determine what you research and look for and what you will find.

For me the unit of analysis, when I do the work that I do, is THE PERSON.

THE PERSON, not the sub neural networks in the left dorsolateral prefrontal cortex, or the latency of the P300 or the mirror neurons inside the deep architecture of the glial network system. They are part of THE PERSON but not THE PERSON.

In the same way macroeconomic considerations of the vast intricacies of the eternal Great Political Games played here on this planet, although important, are only another potential perspective. They are not You.

Coarse, it depends on the outcome you are after: the focus or timeframe that you analyse and pursue

Flexibility in choices of filters is essential, but

No.

And,

the most appropriate starting point is your 'Me'. YourSelf as a person Oh Great Boffin. And the PERSON's around you."

There. I'm done.

I do feel better.

Thanks for listening.

Can I buy you a coffee Paul?

Flick

You can't force yourself to be HAPPY.

blondguy — Wed, 08 Nov 2017 12:10:31 GMT

Hi Flick

I didnt take you on your offer of a cup of tea....I actually use Nerada Tea from Queensland now as it the bees knees...and yes I would love a cuppa 🙂

I am happy that you noticed my post when you were getting back from your long walk. I have a rescued Chow Chow/German Sheperd that I walk every morning and have my phone on 3AW Melbourne as a distraction to my mild agoraphobia (the chronic anxiety has gone...only the remnants are loitering around...even with 30 years of counseling)

I joined the forums in January 2016 after being made redundant and its the smartest move I have ever made as it feels so good to 'give back' after being in corporate for so long

I do agree that the system is broke especially after what you said about your new client. You have a crystal clear understanding of whats happening Flick.

I am well educated Flick...but could you explain what you mentioned " THE PERSON, not the sub neural networks in the left dorsolateral prefrontal cortex, or the latency of the P300 or the mirror neurons inside the deep architecture of the glial network system. They are part of THE PERSON but not THE PERSON.
In the same way macroeconomic considerations of the vast intricacies of the eternal Great Political Games played here on this planet, although important, are only another potential perspective. They are not You"

Thankyou for sharing your understanding of the 'reality' where MH is concerned..

I have learned the 'art' of being simple as it presents less mental conflict/altercations/static where my my own thoughts are concerned....thus a healthier approach to life as we know it...

I will take you up on that cup of tea for sure 🙂

Paul

You can't force yourself to be HAPPY.

Ggrand — Wed, 08 Nov 2017 12:55:32 GMT

Hi Flick, Blondguy and everyone else

I cannot understand most of this. I want to re read again and try to understand it.

You can't force yourself to be HAPPY.

blondguy — Wed, 08 Nov 2017 18:44:58 GMT

Hey GG

with respect to Flick I concur

Paul

You can't force yourself to be HAPPY.

Ggrand — Wed, 08 Nov 2017 19:40:41 GMT

Hi Blondguy,

yes with respect to Flick, it's always a challenge to read Flicks posts. Flick definitely gives my brain a workout have to really read and think, Kind of a few minutes of mindfulness, but unfortunately for me not understood, but enjoy reading them and trying to work them out

One day, I will understand

You can't force yourself to be HAPPY.

Flick_SnotGrass — Wed, 08 Nov 2017 23:10:32 GMT

Sorry all,

I can get obtuse, I know...it's the Boffinization Process I've been through quite a bit. Sorry bout that. The twitching's almost gone tho'.

blondguy what I am getting at is a lot of the MH R&D I see has gotten itself so far down the rathole of ever more tiny disconnected bits of data and information, that the plot has gotten lost.

GG MH has been made so complicated that we 'the users' have become essentially disempowered....and to prove it, we are just not getting better fast enough.

We need much better everyday MH tools that wrok.

OK.

Let me start over.

I call my brain Brian.

It's funny.

We are all wearing Brians...well I've met some Esmeraldas and Samanthas too...but you get the picture.

Our Brians are unbelievably brilliant...they are capable of reprogramming and rewiring themselves using neuroplasticity, if you know how to tickle them right.

Simple case in point. Going to the loo.

We all go to the loo.

We all have showers too.

These are normal ways of getting the crap out of and off our bodies. Normal everyday bodily hygiene.

But what about normal everyday mental hygiene? did you know you can ask your Brian to flush the loo in your head from time to time too?

Yup, you can.

Shit builds up, its a natural byproduct of being alive, it can build up in our heads too.

So, next time you go to the loo, pause before you flush and remember this post...now imagine you are flushing the crap out of your head and watch it being flushed away....and feel a soothing sense of relief.

S'easy.

Flick SnotGrass

You can't force yourself to be HAPPY.

Just Sara — Thu, 09 Nov 2017 02:50:45 GMT

Hey Flick;

When it comes to MH research/development, advances are expressed as either ultra complex, or overly simplistic leaving sufferers scratching their heads.

I've been practicing neuroplasticity in one form or another for many yrs without knowing it had a name. That's due to trial and error on my part - experientially. Just because it has a name though, and is 'now' recognised as valuable, it doesn't mean the theory will catch on unless it shows practical 'applications', and not just theoretical validity.

People on here need step by step guidance along with medication, professional support and coping strategies, then maybe they'll have enough cognitive ability to understand NP. You only have to look at Paul's thread on Mindfulness. People struggle everyday with this very important aspect of recovery.

I'm not saying I don't comprehend what you're talking about because I do. But others need to make sense out of NP before they can learn to use it.

For those of us who're intellectually driven, NP can be a journey of wonder. But for most, it's just another word thrown around to confuse.

A few yrs ago I attended a lecture at CSU. 'Is happiness overrated?'

The biggest item to come out of that talk was 'Happy is Subjective'. What used to make me happy, now doesn't. Things I once took for granted, now make me smile.

I'd rather feel calm and peace than laugh at a joke. I don't mind laughing, but my values have changed since my MH declined. Living without 'noise' in my Brian makes me happy. And, very bloody grateful.

Maybe you could write about your interpretation of 'Happy'? Or have a baseline to work from. People suffering depression or chronic sadness as it's described sometimes might like to respond.

Just for myself though, I'm wondering why NP came up while discussing 'happiness'.

Sorry if I've challenged your thread Flick...

Sez

You can't force yourself to be HAPPY.

Flick_SnotGrass — Thu, 09 Nov 2017 22:30:55 GMT

Hey Sez,

Great to hear from you, and great points too.

Yes NEURO-PLASTICITY is not a new idea at all.

I am guessing you have practiced quite a bit of Yoga, where neuroplasticity or NEURO ELASTICITY, is old hat...been around for thousands of years.

NEURO PLASTICITY a handy rebranding and repositioning of an important idea that we are not stuck.

Even if we're secretly scared we are.

You mentioned healing yourself through trial and error...me too...very little useful guidance via the mainstream, have to explore the tributaries.

May fav introductory books on BRAIN PLASTICITY are:

"The Woman Who Changed Her Brain" by Barbara Arrowsmith-Young

"The Brain's Way of Healing" by Norman Doidge.

Have you read them?

Both very good reads.

What would you recommend we read Sez?

'Happy' ~ big word that.

Imprecise too.

I ask my clients to Bake a Cake of HAPPY and tell me what the ingredients would be ... then take one ingredient at a time....manage one slice at a time.....that makes HAPPY more achievable I find.

[Sez in my world HAPPY is a nominalization~a verb dressed up as a noun as if it was a thing~it's not, Happy is an ongoing process]

Enough SnotGrass enough!!!

The day is broodingly magnificent.

"ONWARDS!!"

'why?'

"BECAUSE!!"

'oh'

Flick SnotGrass

You can't force yourself to be HAPPY.

Quercus — Sun, 12 Nov 2017 15:46:08 GMT

Thank you Flick.

I knew I could count on your thread to distract my "Brian" (I do prefer Esmeralda though).

I like the idea listing the ingredients of a cake of Happy. What kind of responses do clients usually give?

Nat's 'happy' cake...

2 cup of faith and trust

2 cups of love in all it's forms

2 cups of purpose and meaning

Mix well and bake in a hot as hell oven. Hot and uncomfortable. Painfully hot. Let it sit and sweat.

Take it out to cool and rest and recover.

Enjoy slowly. Very slowly. Savour it. Let the faith and trust and love and meaning melt on your tongue.

But don't forget it took the heat of hell to taste so good. Everything is better when you are grateful for what you have.

Wash down with your favourite cup of tea preferably in the company of friends.

Thank you Flick.

You can't force yourself to be HAPPY.

_Lana — Sun, 12 Nov 2017 15:54:50 GMT

Hello

You can't force yourself to be HAPPY.

Flick_SnotGrass — Mon, 13 Nov 2017 04:16:56 GMT

Hey _Lana, Hello to you too....I'm Flick SnotGrass....yes I know it's a funny name but they could have called me SUE ... so I'm grateful for small mercies....what brings you to these parts _Lana? We're a very friendly bunch here, some of us a crazy but not me...oh no no no...I'm normal 🙂 Flick

You can't force yourself to be HAPPY.

Flick_SnotGrass — Mon, 13 Nov 2017 04:21:27 GMT

Hey Nat,

Great cake you baked, especially the bit about the oven!!!

There is much truth in your words, we do seem to need a crucible to refine ourselves within...the Alcheysts did that to produce gold within themselves....7x70 is the number they bandied about.

Glad you like my brand of nonsense Nat 🙂

Flick