topic Finding your inner calm in Staying well

Finding your inner calm

Petal22 — Thu, 21 Apr 2022 23:55:01 GMT

Hi Everyone,

This thread is about finding your inner calm, its something I've worked on for the past four and a half years.

"One of the best lessons in life is how to master how to remain calm"

Mastering how to remain calm takes inner work but once you can master it your inner would becomes very peaceful.

Its something that needs to be tackled internally, sometimes we 'react' to certain things instead of responding.

We all have the choice of how we will respond to something it just takes practice.

If something is going to cause you to lash out and react in a negative way, before you do this you need ask yourself is it really worth it?

If you can just remain calm in this instance your inner world will thank you for it, our minds tend to race forward with reactions but if you can just allow the mind to do this and "watch it" but let your body and internal self to stay deep seated in "watching" and not responding you will see how your inner calm can start to take place.

We all have a inner breath, learn to follow this breath and use it as an anchor and a grounding tool.

If we can learn to control our breathing everything becomes more calmer and we have more clarity in the moment.

Everything takes practice but if this is something that will eventually bring you more inner peace then its practice well spent.. life is a journey and if we can learn how to master how to remain calm in every situation we win.

Practice and perseverance will always get you over the line.

Finding your inner calm

MauriceZ — Fri, 22 Apr 2022 08:24:59 GMT

Negative thoughts can be the source of concern. Even thinking about trying to get rid of any problems can provoke the development of nervousness. In such thoughts it is very easy to lose orientation in life and your own "I".

Of course, without reasoning about how to move on and get out of a difficult situation, it is impossible to solve problems.

Every thought in life can be given a place, but I feel preference can always be given to the positive.

Fill your mind with positive thoughts, praise yourself mentally, tune in to the good and life can become easier.

Finding your inner calm

sbella02 — Fri, 22 Apr 2022 08:34:19 GMT

Petal22,

As always, beautiful words.

I love the idea of having an inner breath that we can use as a grounding tool. That's really meaningful, and so true. Taking a deep breath in and removing yourself from a situation can definitely affect the way you respond. I've been quite stressed over the past few weeks, so this advice is so refreshing to me.

Finding your inner calm

Petal22 — Fri, 22 Apr 2022 12:19:53 GMT

Hi MauriceZaiss,

Well come to our forums and thank you for your post.

I agree with what you have said, negative thoughts can cause nervousness and negative emotions.

I also think that it is really important to tune into the positive because it creates positive emotions and allows our internal world to flow more easily and gives us more inner calm.

I have a lived experience of server anxiety OCD while I was going through this condition I was always on edge ... (the opposite to calm).

BUT during my recovery I learned that the part of the reason that I always felt this way was because I saw everything in my world in a negative way.

I chose from day one of this realisation that I would do everything in my power to turn my mindset around from negative to positive ( it took alot of practice) but by doing this my internal world changed, my world began to feel like more of blessing to me and I had a real shift inside myself I found that by thinking more positively that my inner world became more calmer and at peace.. "If you love life" then "life will love you back".

Finding your inner calm

Petal22 — Fri, 22 Apr 2022 12:31:22 GMT

Hi sbella02,

Thank you and I'm sorry that you have been feeling stressed lately.

Using your breath as a grounding tool is very calming I hope that you find it useful.

Sometimes when I meditate I just simply close my eyes and follow my breath, when I find myself wondering away from my breathe I simply just bring my mind back to my breath.

I use this tool also when I feel stressed or when I find my mind racing, it always brings calm back to internal world and slows everything down.

I find that because I practice this alot my days are calmer and I have alot of clarity because I am in a state of calm.

Finding your inner calm

Petal22 — Sun, 24 Apr 2022 12:19:08 GMT

Just another part to finding your inner calm:

Sometimes we tend to "judge" others in a negative way, this happens automatically sometimes.

We can actually begin to notice when we are doing this, we can choose to change the dialog to something more positive or we can simply redirect or attention onto something in the present moment.

I have found that when we judge in a negative way from an internal point of view our emotions follow in a negative way.

We can choose to "observe" rather than judge, maybe you could give it a try and see if you can feel the difference from an internal perspective.

To create an inner calm we need to choose a pathway that creates internal calm.

Finding your inner calm

Petal22 — Wed, 27 Apr 2022 01:10:05 GMT

Just another add on to this thread of finding your inner calm.

Some times our minds start racing from the moment we wake up..... it starts repeating all of the things that we need to do for the day it can feel tiring just having these things on our minds.

To get your day off to a peaceful start dedicate the first 15min to half an hour to yourself.

You could choose to meditate in this time or even do dome exercise or practice gratefulness or deep slow breathing.

This way you are on the front foot to a calmer day from within.

When the mind does start to race forward with all of the tasks you need to do, try to be conscious of this and just calmly redirect your attention to the present moment and the task on hand.

Remember we can only do one thing at a time, sometimes our minds need to take a back seat and you can allow your mind to do this while still remaining calmly in the present moment.

The trick is to remain in the present moment and allow yourself to be there.

Finding your inner calm

Petal22 — Wed, 27 Apr 2022 01:25:19 GMT

Anger is a emotion that we all have felt and its something that arises within us.

Its something that we can choose to 'react to' or its something we can choose to just " let pass" to create and inner calm, the "choice" is yours.

Anger Mantra

Breathing in, I know

the anger is here.

Breathing out, I know that the anger is not me.

Breathing in, I know that anger is unpleasant.

Breathing out, I know the feeling will pass.

Breathing in, I am calm.

Breathing out, I am strong

Enough to take care of this anger.

Thich Nhat Hanh

Finding your inner calm

sbella02 — Wed, 27 Apr 2022 13:00:25 GMT

Petal22,

The Anger Mantra you've shared is really valuable, I'm saving it for when I need it.

I also love the idea of starting your day with 15-30 minutes just to be with yourself and get into the day on the right foot. I made it one of my new year's resolutions for this year to meditate for 15 minutes every day, but haven't necessarily gotten around to it. Your post has reminded me to do so 🙂

Finding your inner calm

Petal22 — Thu, 28 Apr 2022 12:06:33 GMT

Thanks sbella02 happy to help 🙂

Finding your inner calm

Petal22 — Fri, 29 Apr 2022 05:39:30 GMT

Finding your inner calm

"My peace is more important than proving my point"

I believe that this quote is very important to finding your inner calm, maybe someone does something negative towards you.

Would you choose to react back to this negative person with the same negativity they gave to you?

Or instead

Would you choose just to remain in your calm place and just walk away and not give it a second thought?

We can learn to stay still from within and just watch these things come and go without being effected by them internally. ( it takes practice)

Finding your inner calm

Petal22 — Tue, 03 May 2022 08:32:16 GMT

I came across the below and thought I would add it to this thread because this is also something that will lead you to your inner calm.

I was asked why me and a certain person don't speak anymore. After giving a brief explanation they responded why don't you be the bigger person and reach out and discuss the issue.

People tend to think being the bigger person means speaking on a issue, but don't realize sometimes being the bigger person means moving on from the situation and the person. Stop forcing relationships that are toxic. Stop reaching out just to think you both came to a understanding then the same issues repeats itself. It's okay not to have people you love in your life. Love and peace is a combination and I can love you from a distance peacefully.

Finding your inner calm

Petal22 — Sun, 08 May 2022 13:44:48 GMT

We can all learn to tune into our own energy vibration ( it takes practice)….

I try to hold a calm uplifted positive vibration….

Sometimes when we are confronted with some one who holds a more lower negative vibration they can sometimes start to bring our vibration down.

With practice you can remain calm and hold your chosen vibration even when someone confronts you with a lower vibration.

You will be so grounded in your own vibration that you can’t be dragged down to another level……

It all takes practice ❤️🙏

Finding your inner calm

Bob_22 — Tue, 10 May 2022 01:29:58 GMT

Some great points here, thanks Petal. I will be sure to try some of this thoughts out.

I also find when I am confronted by unwanted thoughts or emotions, trying to remind myself that it is temporary and will pass with time (in my experience) helpful as well.

Finding your inner calm

Petal22 — Tue, 10 May 2022 07:49:24 GMT

Hi Bob 22,

Thank you for your input 🙂 I hope some of the information helps you.

Yes I agree just reminding ourselves that the thoughts and emotions are just temporary and they will pass in time is something that really helps our ability to try to just let them come and go.

Finding your inner calm

Petal22 — Tue, 10 May 2022 08:03:55 GMT

Meditation is something that really contributes to finding your inner calm.

Meditation is something that takes practice.

I like to do a guided meditation for learning to watch my thoughts, I have found by doing this meditation it has taught me that I'm not my thoughts but the watcher of my thoughts.

I found meditation to be one of my saving graces in the fact that it really helped me to become so aware that my mind is something that I'm separate to and I can "observe" what my mind is doing and not get caught up in it, I could watch it.

My mind can bring up all of the negative things but by remaining calm and just observing what my mind is doing I don't need to identify with it, I can just allow it to do it's own thing while I just watch it and remain in my calm place.

Meditation can really teach you to be centered and grounded.

Another easy meditation tip if you ever feel like your mind is going very fast or in an anxious state, try to just redirect your attention to your breathe, follow your breath , use your breath as your anchor. This can also bring you back to your inner calm.

It all takes practice

Finding your inner calm

Petal22 — Wed, 11 May 2022 02:59:28 GMT

People pleasing

If you are trying to find your inner calm try not to feel as though you need to 'people please'.

Maybe you just worked a long shift and your feeling tired, your boss asks you if you can work another shift tomorrow because they are short of staff.

In this situation people can feel the need to people please by saying "yes" even though they really don't want to work the shift due to fatigue.

It's ok to say "no" by saying no you are looking after yourself and your inner calm.

Finding your inner calm

Petal22 — Sun, 15 May 2022 12:17:17 GMT

Learning to change your perceptions can help you to find your inner calm.

Maybe you could perceive your partner in a certain a way that brings up negative emotion inside yourself.

Your perception could be anger towards this person.( not for any real pacific event its just an emotion that you perceive while in their presence).

If you could learn to challenge and change this perception to something more of love towards them you will find that in time you will begin to obtain your inner calm inside you while you are around them.

Your tone of voice will change when your around them and you will just feel your inner calm. ( it takes practice)

Finding your inner calm

livi_mivi — Sun, 15 May 2022 12:49:14 GMT

Hey Petal22,

I really like this mentality and I think this is such an important aspect in finding your inner calm. Often, we are curious and can become easily absorbed by gossip and judgement of people we might know or might not know at all. I think by focusing our energy on these often negative experiences, we are depriving ourselves and reinforcing negative patterns not only towards others, but towards ourselves too. I really like the idea of re-training our internal dialogue to be kinder to others because I believe that can contribute positively to our self-belief and dialogue too.

I love this thread and will be coming back to it when I need to be reminded of all of the things I can do to help my find peace within myself!

Finding your inner calm

Petal22 — Mon, 16 May 2022 06:53:35 GMT

Hi livi mivi,

Thank you and yes I agree with you.

I’ve learned to always turn my back to gossip because gossip is just false perceptions of people that others hold….. no one really know the person who s being gossiped about except the person themselves.

Kindness to ourselves and others has great benefits especially positive emotions.

😊