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    <title>topic Re: bullying in Suicidal thoughts and self-harm</title>
    <link>https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/suicidal-thoughts-and-self-harm/bullying/m-p/591946#M50476</link>
    <description>&lt;P&gt;Some people's idea of 'fun' can be seriously questionable. When someone &lt;EM&gt;makes&lt;/EM&gt; fun, pays to ask what it is they're &lt;EM&gt;really&lt;/EM&gt; making. &lt;EM&gt;Making&lt;/EM&gt; life hell in some way? &lt;EM&gt;Making&lt;/EM&gt; themself out to be better than someone, at that person's expense? &lt;EM&gt;Making&lt;/EM&gt; a statement of ignorance? &lt;EM&gt;Making&lt;/EM&gt; light of the fact they have mental health issues or serious issues with their perception? They could be making a whole stack of stuff but 'fun' isn't it.&lt;/P&gt;&lt;P&gt;&amp;nbsp;&lt;/P&gt;&lt;P&gt;Just expanding on a few of those things&lt;/P&gt;&lt;UL&gt;&lt;LI&gt;&lt;STRONG&gt;&lt;EM&gt;Making&lt;/EM&gt; themself out to be better than someone, at that person's expense.&lt;/STRONG&gt; The expense means we pay with our self esteem. Kind of like 'This joke I make about you will cost you an ounce of your self esteem'. Over time, when all the ounces add up, the cost to us can be great. With the degrading aspect, it can also occasionally be 'If I degrade you, it makes me a grade above you and that makes me feel good about myself'. No one's really better than anyone else, we're all just different&lt;/LI&gt;&lt;LI&gt;&lt;STRONG&gt;&lt;EM&gt;Making&lt;/EM&gt; a statement of ignorance.&lt;/STRONG&gt; If someone 'makes fun', they can be ignoring the pain they cause, ignoring the need to show us compassion, ignoring the need to think before they speak (ignoring the need for a filter) while ignoring a whole lot of other things. Basically, this makes them ignorant, with all that ignoring going on&lt;/LI&gt;&lt;LI&gt;&lt;STRONG&gt;&lt;EM&gt;Making&lt;/EM&gt; light&lt;/STRONG&gt; &lt;STRONG&gt;of &lt;/STRONG&gt;or shedding light on&lt;STRONG&gt; the fact they have mental health issues (issues with their perception for example).&amp;nbsp;&lt;/STRONG&gt;If nice, thoughtful, caring people lead us to feel happines through what they say and how they behave, you could say the way they think and behave is healthy. On the other hand, if cruel, thoughtless and unfeeling people (who can't feel for us) lead us to feel like garbage, you could say the way &lt;EM&gt;they&lt;/EM&gt; think and behave is &lt;EM&gt;un&lt;/EM&gt;healthy. &lt;EM&gt;Mentally&lt;/EM&gt;, you could say they have a very unhealthy perception. Pays to question people's mental health or healthiness. Often they'll tell you there's nothing wrong with them and that it's &lt;EM&gt;you&lt;/EM&gt; with the problem. Hmm&lt;span class="lia-unicode-emoji" title=":thinking_face:"&gt;🤔&lt;/span&gt;, what can I say. Degrading and depressing people &lt;EM&gt;feel&lt;/EM&gt; degrading and depressing, there's no two ways about it&lt;/LI&gt;&lt;/UL&gt;&lt;P&gt;I think one of the greatest challenges in life is to make some fun for our self or make fun of our self in amusing ways. For example, while someone could make short jokes that are impacting, the fun response may be 'If I'm &lt;EM&gt;below&lt;/EM&gt; the average height and you are &lt;EM&gt;of&lt;/EM&gt; the average height, doesn't this technically make me exceptional and you seriously average? I'd much rather be labeled as exceptional than average'. Or maybe 'While I &lt;EM&gt;appear&lt;/EM&gt; short, you come up short in ways that aren't so obvious. Being a sensitive kind of guy/gal, I can easily &lt;EM&gt;sense&lt;/EM&gt; them. Hey, call it a talent'. Can take a heck of a lot of practice before someone develops a quick wit with which to combat people's comments. Do you feel there could be a bit of a comedian in you waiting to come out? You'll find a lot of successful comedians struggled with bullying and self esteem issues when they were younger. Btw, I cannot stand comedians who make fun at the expense of others. In my mind, they've sold out. They've kinda sold their soul for the big bucks, at a cost to others. Every dollar hurt someone. I don't find them funny at all. I &lt;EM&gt;do&lt;/EM&gt; find them ignorant though.&lt;span class="lia-unicode-emoji" title=":smiling_face_with_smiling_eyes:"&gt;😊&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/P&gt;</description>
    <pubDate>Wed, 22 May 2024 20:57:58 GMT</pubDate>
    <dc:creator>therising</dc:creator>
    <dc:date>2024-05-22T20:57:58Z</dc:date>
    <item>
      <title>bullying</title>
      <link>https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/suicidal-thoughts-and-self-harm/bullying/m-p/591892#M50474</link>
      <description>&lt;P&gt;people have been making fun of me beacuse im small and i got leaked&lt;/P&gt;&lt;P&gt;&amp;nbsp;&lt;/P&gt;</description>
      <pubDate>Tue, 21 May 2024 22:54:41 GMT</pubDate>
      <guid>https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/suicidal-thoughts-and-self-harm/bullying/m-p/591892#M50474</guid>
      <dc:creator>Guest_86732294</dc:creator>
      <dc:date>2024-05-21T22:54:41Z</dc:date>
    </item>
    <item>
      <title>Re: bullying</title>
      <link>https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/suicidal-thoughts-and-self-harm/bullying/m-p/591921#M50475</link>
      <description>&lt;P&gt;&lt;SPAN&gt;I'm really sorry to hear that you're going through this. It's not fair that people are making fun of you for something that's beyond your control. I have been in a similar (?) position where somebody was bullying me and the words hurt long after they are said. Please r&lt;/SPAN&gt;&lt;SPAN&gt;emember that your worth isn't defined by their words or actions. Listening if you want to chat more.&lt;/SPAN&gt;&lt;/P&gt;</description>
      <pubDate>Wed, 22 May 2024 09:17:45 GMT</pubDate>
      <guid>https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/suicidal-thoughts-and-self-harm/bullying/m-p/591921#M50475</guid>
      <dc:creator>smallwolf</dc:creator>
      <dc:date>2024-05-22T09:17:45Z</dc:date>
    </item>
    <item>
      <title>Re: bullying</title>
      <link>https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/suicidal-thoughts-and-self-harm/bullying/m-p/591946#M50476</link>
      <description>&lt;P&gt;Some people's idea of 'fun' can be seriously questionable. When someone &lt;EM&gt;makes&lt;/EM&gt; fun, pays to ask what it is they're &lt;EM&gt;really&lt;/EM&gt; making. &lt;EM&gt;Making&lt;/EM&gt; life hell in some way? &lt;EM&gt;Making&lt;/EM&gt; themself out to be better than someone, at that person's expense? &lt;EM&gt;Making&lt;/EM&gt; a statement of ignorance? &lt;EM&gt;Making&lt;/EM&gt; light of the fact they have mental health issues or serious issues with their perception? They could be making a whole stack of stuff but 'fun' isn't it.&lt;/P&gt;&lt;P&gt;&amp;nbsp;&lt;/P&gt;&lt;P&gt;Just expanding on a few of those things&lt;/P&gt;&lt;UL&gt;&lt;LI&gt;&lt;STRONG&gt;&lt;EM&gt;Making&lt;/EM&gt; themself out to be better than someone, at that person's expense.&lt;/STRONG&gt; The expense means we pay with our self esteem. Kind of like 'This joke I make about you will cost you an ounce of your self esteem'. Over time, when all the ounces add up, the cost to us can be great. With the degrading aspect, it can also occasionally be 'If I degrade you, it makes me a grade above you and that makes me feel good about myself'. No one's really better than anyone else, we're all just different&lt;/LI&gt;&lt;LI&gt;&lt;STRONG&gt;&lt;EM&gt;Making&lt;/EM&gt; a statement of ignorance.&lt;/STRONG&gt; If someone 'makes fun', they can be ignoring the pain they cause, ignoring the need to show us compassion, ignoring the need to think before they speak (ignoring the need for a filter) while ignoring a whole lot of other things. Basically, this makes them ignorant, with all that ignoring going on&lt;/LI&gt;&lt;LI&gt;&lt;STRONG&gt;&lt;EM&gt;Making&lt;/EM&gt; light&lt;/STRONG&gt; &lt;STRONG&gt;of &lt;/STRONG&gt;or shedding light on&lt;STRONG&gt; the fact they have mental health issues (issues with their perception for example).&amp;nbsp;&lt;/STRONG&gt;If nice, thoughtful, caring people lead us to feel happines through what they say and how they behave, you could say the way they think and behave is healthy. On the other hand, if cruel, thoughtless and unfeeling people (who can't feel for us) lead us to feel like garbage, you could say the way &lt;EM&gt;they&lt;/EM&gt; think and behave is &lt;EM&gt;un&lt;/EM&gt;healthy. &lt;EM&gt;Mentally&lt;/EM&gt;, you could say they have a very unhealthy perception. Pays to question people's mental health or healthiness. Often they'll tell you there's nothing wrong with them and that it's &lt;EM&gt;you&lt;/EM&gt; with the problem. Hmm&lt;span class="lia-unicode-emoji" title=":thinking_face:"&gt;🤔&lt;/span&gt;, what can I say. Degrading and depressing people &lt;EM&gt;feel&lt;/EM&gt; degrading and depressing, there's no two ways about it&lt;/LI&gt;&lt;/UL&gt;&lt;P&gt;I think one of the greatest challenges in life is to make some fun for our self or make fun of our self in amusing ways. For example, while someone could make short jokes that are impacting, the fun response may be 'If I'm &lt;EM&gt;below&lt;/EM&gt; the average height and you are &lt;EM&gt;of&lt;/EM&gt; the average height, doesn't this technically make me exceptional and you seriously average? I'd much rather be labeled as exceptional than average'. Or maybe 'While I &lt;EM&gt;appear&lt;/EM&gt; short, you come up short in ways that aren't so obvious. Being a sensitive kind of guy/gal, I can easily &lt;EM&gt;sense&lt;/EM&gt; them. Hey, call it a talent'. Can take a heck of a lot of practice before someone develops a quick wit with which to combat people's comments. Do you feel there could be a bit of a comedian in you waiting to come out? You'll find a lot of successful comedians struggled with bullying and self esteem issues when they were younger. Btw, I cannot stand comedians who make fun at the expense of others. In my mind, they've sold out. They've kinda sold their soul for the big bucks, at a cost to others. Every dollar hurt someone. I don't find them funny at all. I &lt;EM&gt;do&lt;/EM&gt; find them ignorant though.&lt;span class="lia-unicode-emoji" title=":smiling_face_with_smiling_eyes:"&gt;😊&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/P&gt;</description>
      <pubDate>Wed, 22 May 2024 20:57:58 GMT</pubDate>
      <guid>https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/suicidal-thoughts-and-self-harm/bullying/m-p/591946#M50476</guid>
      <dc:creator>therising</dc:creator>
      <dc:date>2024-05-22T20:57:58Z</dc:date>
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