topic Re: What does help or support actually look like? in Suicidal thoughts and self-harm

What does help or support actually look like?

NotInDistress — Tue, 07 Nov 2023 02:36:09 GMT

Looking for advice on suicidal thoughts or more what happens once someone decides to get help/support as advised.

Support from friends or family if you ask them tend towards them not understanding or asking how they can help, but if you don't know how they can help, what then?

Help lines and councilors just seem to be someone to talk to? I'm not knocking this but for me talking to someone doesn't seem to be a solution.

What does professional help look like? Is it just psychologist appointments?

Re: What does help or support actually look like?

stell_a178 — Tue, 07 Nov 2023 06:44:17 GMT

Hey notindistress.
I can relate to this question a lot. A lot of times when I’ve gone to seek help for negative thoughts, they always mention how “harming yourself is never an option”. In some ways, yes they are correct. And in other ways I am frustrated because I have tried to seek help and all I’m getting is a bunch of nothing. Like putting my name down to see a psychologist, but being forced to wait three months to actually see them. More recently I have put my name on a wait list for a hospital that has around 30ish psychiatrists on call 24/7. This is how I am trying to get better. Because meds haven’t worked, psychologists haven’t given me any suitable plans yet and online forums only work partially.

I would suggest - if it gets bad - heading to a mental hospital and staying there. Or even just attempting to go there - they might have someone who could at least help you in the short-term.

I really hope things start looking up for u.

stella

Re: What does help or support actually look like?

NotInDistress — Tue, 07 Nov 2023 09:01:25 GMT

Thanks for the reply stella,

Things will look up I'm sure.

You're right it seems like there's big divide between how bad you have see someone in a timely way and just having a bad time but could use help. Wait for months to see a psych or presenting to a hospital.

Re: What does help or support actually look like?

therising — Tue, 07 Nov 2023 19:09:41 GMT

Hi NotInDistress

I've found managing myself and life to be a bit of a rabbit hole experience. It's a little like you enter the rabbit hole of greater self understanding and self development where you can choose to explore the psychological reasons for deep depression, for example. Can choose to explore the possible physical reasons, for which there can be a wide variety (chemical imbalances included). Can explore the soulful reasons too. You can pick 1 of 3 channels of exploration yet further along may find there there to be a number of intersecting points. Can be a complex system, which can sometimes help explain why 1 or 2 simple approaches may not always work. For example, while someone could see a psychologist in the way of psychological self understanding and skill development, who refers them to a psychiatrist that prescribes meds for physical chemical or neurological issues on top of that, life can possibly still feel soul destroying if that 3rd channel isn't explored. On the other hand, one simple channel of exploration can offer a cure all in some cases. While I've managed a whole variety of reasons for depression over the years, I had no idea a seriously depressing B12 deficiency was a thing until I experienced it for myself. Same with sleep apnea. Both are purely physical reasons for depression.

At the end of the day, you want to go down the rabbit hole of self understanding and development and that's a good thing. That's what counts. 'Which way to go from here?', once you've committed to going in, is the question. A GP can often be a good start, as they can help direct you with the assistance of blood tests (to rule out some possible underlying depressing chemical deficiencies) while basically assessing and writing up a mental health care plan, along with a referral to a psychologist. If you're a bit of a soulful type, psycho-spiritual counseling can be another option. Btw, the spiritual aspect isn't all 'woo woo'. Some of it covers quantum physics, relating to how energy naturally behaves and how a lack of energy in motion (a lack of e-motion) for example can become depressing.

Can't explore the whole rabbit warren all at once but you gotta start somewhere. 'I can no longer tolerate living this way' precedes the first step into the great unknown. You are truly amazing when it comes to to how you tick, something you'll gradually come to discover. How we work is complex and stunning and sometimes it can even be incredibly depressing.

Re: What does help or support actually look like?

smallwolf — Thu, 09 Nov 2023 12:19:20 GMT

hello and welcome.

I hope you don't mind if I just jump into answering your questions.

On family and friends ... There are two ways it can go - they will be be supportive or not. And assuming they are supportive the best they can do for you is to listen and you tell the story is what is happening, feelings, thoughts etc. Of course, telling your story takes courage as well.

Helplines and counsellors can be different, but since you refer to talking to someone then in talking with that someone can help to release some of that internal pressure you might be feeling.

Professional help can involve psychologist and/or psychiatrist help. And by help, this means helping you find coping strategies etc. In an appointment you may talk about what has happened since you last saw them, get homework to do. They may also suggest apps to use between appointments. There are 2 apps that I use and consider helpful.

And if you do not feel ready to talk with gamily, then when talking with a psychologist you can get tips and help in having that conversation.

I started this journey a few years ago because keeping it inside of myself was the wrong way of going about it. Talking with a professional provided a way to talk to someone about things I could not tell another person. Hope this helps.