topic Sexually Abused at School PTSD. in PTSD and trauma

Sexually Abused at School PTSD.

Joolia95 — Wed, 23 Dec 2020 10:25:53 GMT

This post is hard to write as I have been silent for 20 years. When I was 10 years old I was sexually abused at school by a teacher. I never told anyone because I was scared that no one would believe me.

I don't want to be silent anymore I want to tell my story so others too feel that they have a voice.
I have suffered during my adulthood with relationships, jobs and trusting other people
and as time goes on I believe it is all because I was sexually abused.

Has anyone been in a similar situation? How did you get help and did you get lawyers involved.
So much has been taken from me I want justice.

Sexually Abused at School PTSD.

Sophie_M — Wed, 23 Dec 2020 10:59:26 GMT

Hi Joolia95,

I'm really awed by the strength you have shown in opening up about such a difficult and painful thing that's happened to you, and please know our forums are a safe space and that we are here to do whatever we can to support you.

In addition to our forums, you might also find the Blue Knot Foundation helpful; they're an organisation that specialises in helping adults who have survived childhood abuse and offer counselling as well.

I'll step back to let the rest of our community chime in, but in the meantime please feel free to keep checking in with us whenever you need.

Sexually Abused at School PTSD.

Truc — Thu, 24 Dec 2020 06:59:45 GMT

Hi Joolia95
I have never been in a similar situation but my friend did actually, but maybe her is mild, not serious as it seems so because it had been prevented on time, in your case I dont know and I hope you are okay, in my recommendation, when I encountered and recalled any abuse i had before not just sexual abuse, i will ask myself that what really happened on that day, if I go back what would I do ?, and if I sue him or her, what is going to happen to him and to me and is it worth my time, energy, effort, can I handle a long term lawsuit ? Those questions may be confirmations to make sure your relationships, jobs and trusting issues were caused by this or not, only you can answer that question to yourself I suppose.
Secondly, relationships, jobs and trusting issues may not be caused by that but different things, I think you can look at different angles and look deep at what has gone wrong to cause you such problems. Again only you can answer this question as well.

After those confirmations and questions, and those are quite positive toward the cause, I think you can be confident to ask for justice. I hope it is helpful.

Sexually Abused at School PTSD.

sunnyl20 — Thu, 24 Dec 2020 08:15:39 GMT

Hi Joolia95,

I am sorry for what you have been through. I cannot imagine how traumatic that must have been for you and how painful it has been staying silent. I am sorry you felt that you would not be believed. I believe you.

You are right, it is more than likely affecting many if not all aspects of your life - childhood sexual abuse can have a profound and damaging effect on a person's physical and mental health, including their development, relationships, their ability to get a job etc.

It will be helpful to work with a counsellor or psychologist who can help you process the trauma that you have suffered. They will also be able to support you if/when you decide to pursue legal action - as the legal process will likely be very draining and traumatising.

You are extremely courageous to share what you have been through. I am so sorry for what happened to you. Please do not hesitate to reach out when you feel up to it. You may also find it helpful to look through past forums - there may be some advice and support that you can find there from people who have had similar experiences.

Take care.

Sexually Abused at School PTSD.

Joolia95 — Thu, 24 Dec 2020 14:25:06 GMT

Dear sunny

Thank you for taking the time to comment. It has definitely been the hardest road i have travelled on sadly I know I'm not the only one that has been through it.

I have not shared this with anyone and until yesterday I believed I would take this burden to my grave.
I cant stay silent anymore I owe it to my child self justice.

I have a GP appointment next week and hopefully get on a mental health plan and get on my healing journey.

Much Love

JOOLIA.

Sexually Abused at School PTSD.

geoff — Thu, 24 Dec 2020 17:57:55 GMT

Hello Joolia95, thanks for having the courage to let people know because this person needs to be reported as undoubtedly you wouldn't be the only person subjected to this intrusion, and you're not sure whether other people are in the same position as you, that's why after struggling for 20 years, now is the time to begin the process, it's been a long time for you to suffer.

You don't necessarily have to contact other people who went to school with you, that's your decision, but definitely, a lawyer who deals with sexual abuse and then the police, ask the lawyer first, because they will advise you to get a solicitor.

You can sort of mention it in some way on facebook without giving too much away because we don't want you to feel embarrassed in any way and say this with the greatest respect.

Your story is so important.

Best wishes.

Geoff.

Sexually Abused at School PTSD.

aegidius — Sun, 27 Dec 2020 10:07:48 GMT

Have had persistent bullying at school (now 50 years in the past!) but it took a lot from me, and authorities were complicit as they turned their backs and did nothing. Not wishing to compare experiences, as obviously sexual abuse from a power figure is next level again, but your words resonated. There's no sunset clause on this sort of abuse afaik (check with your lawyer though) so you should be able to bring action if you want to do that. I see people are taking their time to post to you on Xmas day, they and I see this as a really important issue - whoever is the perp, the fact is that people are being robbed of their potential for later life, and there need to be some consequences for those who did that to you. Give 'em hell.

Sexually Abused at School PTSD.

Knuckleberry_Poe — Mon, 22 Mar 2021 12:17:20 GMT

Hi Jillian. Your story sounds a little like what I experienced. I was molested by a teacher at 11. It started when I went to High School and continued for 5 years. I was also being physically and verbally bullied and assaulted by students as well. Which lead me to be further victimised outside of school. I was the target by different individuals and groups over a ten year period. At the second educational institution the teachers saw me being physically and sexually assaulted and allowed it to happen.
I pushed it down and pushed it away for twenty years before I had the courage to make a report.
You do what you feel is best for you. There is support out there if you need.

Sexually Abused at School PTSD.

Time_out — Thu, 25 Mar 2021 09:56:21 GMT

Hi Joolia I experienced the same thing I was abused by 2 teachers can’t seem to move forward stuck in the s as me place some days don’t want to be here anymore very hard RV

Sexually Abused at School PTSD.

Sophie_M — Thu, 25 Mar 2021 10:13:43 GMT

Hi Time out,

We are very sorry about what you have gone through by people who were entrusted with your wellbeing. It simply isn't fair that you endured such abuse and trauma by those who were meant to have your best interest at heart. We have contacted you privately to offer support.

We would strongly urge that in overwhelming moments you get in touch with our friends at Lifeline (13 11 14) or the Suicide Call Back Service (1300 659 467).

You can also contact 1800RESPECT. They offer 24/7 confidential information, counselling and support for people impacted by sexual assault, domestic or family violence and abuse. The lovely supportive counsellors have a lot of experience offering advice and support to anyone who has been through trauma like this. You can contact them on 1800 737 732 or visit  https://www.1800respect.org.au/

For support with childhood trauma, you can speak with a Blue Knot Helpline trauma counsellor including for support and applications around national redress - 1300 657 380 Monday - Sunday between 9am - 5pm AEST - https://www.blueknot.org.au/

You are not alone, this community is more than willing support you and to be there for you. Please contiinue to visit and post on the forum.

Sexually Abused at School PTSD.

Joolia95 — Tue, 30 Mar 2021 11:49:21 GMT

Hello,

I am so sorry to hear that.
Please know that you are not alone. There is help out there and people are willing to help.

Sexually Abused at School PTSD.

Joolia95 — Tue, 30 Mar 2021 11:54:09 GMT

Hello,

I am sorry for what you have been through that must have been so traumatic.
Hard to believe that there is such evil in the world.

I have discussed the abuse with my GP but have not made a report to the police yet as I am scared.

If you don't mind sharing how did you make the report?
What happened after?
I am afraid of what will happen whether I would be believed or not.

Sexually Abused at School PTSD.

Knuckleberry_Poe — Thu, 08 Apr 2021 10:39:39 GMT

Hi Jillian 95. I'm sorry it's taken me so long to reply. To answer your question about reporting the abuse. I initially attended a psychologist after suffering severe nightmares. Then I was put on to a group called CASA. Centre Against Sexual Assault. Where I received specific counseling for my trauma. From there I was given a phone number for a specific Police branch SOCIT Sexual offences child abuse investigation team.
I rang them and told them I wanted to report numerous historical offences against me.

In some ways I was treated well by the police. In the case of what happened to me in Ag College the female detective basically told me she'd heard worse cases of assault than mine. And except for one specific incident she didn't think it was sexual assaults she thought it was physical assault and sexual harrassment. I vigorously disagreed with her.
None of the cases ever went to court.
Both schools let me down by ignoring what was happening right in front of their faces.
So I can honestly say the justice system was a mixed bag, both good and bad.

Sexually Abused at School PTSD.

Knuckleberry_Poe — Thu, 08 Apr 2021 10:55:29 GMT

Hi Joolia95
Following on from my previous response. Sorry for the misspelling of your name.
Don't be scared of reporting. In the case of the SOCIIT team in Victoria Police, I was treated very well. They investigated every angle they could and believed me. Unfortunately they couldn't categorise what happened to me as child sexual abuse, or even sexual assault. It was termed indecent assault of a minor. My memory of the reason why is a bit fuzzy and the legal terminology for sexual acts is always changing. By today's laws it would be sexual assault of a minor.
The public prosecutors wouldn't charge my abuser or take him to court because I was the only complainant in a historical case. My allegations could not be verified by anyone else.
The Vic Police were very good in dealing with me. I went to my first initial meeting with a detective with my CASA counselor. Every other interview I handled on my own.

I would suggest taking a support person with you. If you are in counseling through a sexual assault victims group they usually organise something for you.
I know what I've answered may seem scary and confusing but it's only because I had multiple reports to make, in two different States. Vic and Qld.
Take your time in deciding. You will know when it's right for you.
If your abuse was institutional, like at school there is the Royal Commission. U spoke to a magistrate over the phone. Also there is a foundation called KNOW MORE Which may be able to give you more advice.

Sexually Abused at School PTSD.

Joolia95 — Sat, 10 Apr 2021 08:52:19 GMT

Hey Knuckleberry,

Thank you for taking the time to reply.

I have reported it to the SANO task force here in VIC. I reported it after speaking to my Therapist. I was really scared to do it but something deep down in me forced me to. I didn't want to be silent anymore! Almost felt like the abuser was winning.

My abuse happened at an institution. Now I am scared because it seems they treat cases differently as there is way worse out there than what happened to me. This really saddens me to know that there are such sick individuals living among us. I was always so afraid to report it incase the Police wouldn't believe me.

I have a lawyer who is dealing with my case and she has been very supportive I guess that helps alot.

At the have completed a statement for SANO now I'm waiting to hear back from them and see what happens next.

I can't believe that the person was never charged. Our justice system is shit.

How are you doing now?

In the end what ended up happening with your case?
Did you get any response from the school?

Sexually Abused at School PTSD.

Knuckleberry_Poe — Sat, 10 Apr 2021 09:26:14 GMT

Hey Joolia95. I'm glad that you found the courage to report.
In my case, I haven't had a response from either the high school or Ag college.
I couldn't get justice through the criminal courts.
So I've tried to get justice through the civil courts.
I don't think any of the people who hurt me will be charged for what they did to me. But I suspect that they have hurt others too, so maybe the Police will get them another way.