topic PTSD and Sexual Assult- I need advice in PTSD and trauma

PTSD and Sexual Assult- I need advice

Ashs — Mon, 03 May 2021 11:11:30 GMT

Hello peoples!

I'm 13 and lived quite a normal teenage life. But in January 2021, I got sexually assaulted. I was on a family holiday and my cousin tried to rape me. He grabbed me without consent and attempted to rape me. Even thought it only happened for a few seconds, it was very traumatic. Now its May 2021 ( so 4 months later) and i'm kinda stuck. Recently ( since March/April) I have started to have symptoms of PTSD/Trauma. I constantly have flashbacks during the day of the event (at very random moments) and also get triggered/have bad thoughts when kids at school talk about rape and sexual assault. I also feel a lot more stressed and am worried/afraid to walk/go anywhere by myself and am generally afraid of men. Whenever i walk to school alone and pass a man, I get anxiety and freak out. My heart starts beating and i breathe faster. Even thought they aren't doing anything. Just walking past. It happens every day, and my parents are starting to become worried. I also am a little bit stressed/guilty since because of the event, my family is split up and i can't see my cousins/aunt/uncles again since its traumatic to see my cousin who caused everything. My parents know what happened and want to help but i need advice on what to do. Where do i go from here? How do i get help? Do i go see someone like a therapist or doctor or psychologist? So please respond and help me cause i really need it.

Thanks, Ash

PTSD and Sexual Assult- I need advice

Sophie_M — Mon, 03 May 2021 11:39:36 GMT

Hi Ashs,

Welcome to our friendly online community. We are so grateful that you have reached out here for some support after such a traumatic event. Please know that this is a safe space to talk about what you're thinking and feeling, and to talk with others who have been through similar experiences. We are so sorry to hear what has happened to you, and that this has affected your sense of safety in the world. It's good to hear that your parents are aware of what has happened and are wanting to support you. There are lots of options of how you can access some professional support, and there is no right or wrong way to do this. You can try one way, and if that isn't helpful for you personally, you can then try another. We are getting in touch privately to offer some support.

A good first step might be to talk to a counsellor on the phone to get some advice on how you might get help. 1800RESPECT is a good service where you will be able to speak to a counsellor. They offer 24/7 confidential information, counselling and support for people impacted by sexual assault, domestic or family violence and abuse. The lovely supportive counsellors have a lot of experience offering advice and support to anyone who has been through trauma like this. You can contact them on 1800 737 732 or visit https://www.1800respect.org.au/

Another place to get some good advice is Kids Help Line. They are a 24/7 confidential and anonymous, telephone and online counselling service specifically for young people aged 25 and under.

You can also ask any questions that you might have here in your thread. Thank you again for reaching out here and sharing your story - please feel free to come back here anytime and let us know how things are going for you.

PTSD and Sexual Assult- I need advice

Summer Rose — Mon, 03 May 2021 13:36:22 GMT

Hi Ash

Welcome to the bb forum. Your post was very brave and I want to congratulate you for having the strength to tell your story.

I am so very sorry that your cousin sexually assaulted you. This shocking event should have never happened. It is not your fault and neither is the family fallout. Only your cousin bears responsibility.

If you were my daughter I would be very proud of you for coming forward with your truth. I would encourage you to focus on healing.

As it turns out, I am a mum and my daughter found herself in need of mental health support and treatment when she was the same age as you, 13.

We started with our GP and I say we because she asked me to go with her for support. The GP asked questions about how she was feeling and also asked me about what I was observing at home. He also asked questions about how things were going at school and if she was eating and sleeping.

My daughter was hesitant to share at first but I pointed out to her that everything said to the doctor is confidential. In addition, doctors help a lot of people—there was nothing she could say that he hadn’t heard before.

In other words, there was no reason to feel embarrassed or ashamed. Anyone can fall ill at any time.

The doctor then told us what he thought was happening and made a mental health care plan and gave us a referral to the type of specialist he thought could best help.

For my daughter, talking with our GP was a great start. But as Sophie says, it’s not the only way to go about this. How do you feel about talking with your GP?

The one thing that is essential, however, is the act of reaching out because while people may fall ill they also get better. With the right treatment things can get better for you.

Kind thoughts to you brave girl and hugs too

PTSD and Sexual Assult- I need advice

Guest_1643 — Mon, 03 May 2021 15:33:13 GMT

Hi Ash

Welcome to the forums

I just wanted to reassure you that although all those symptoms are super scary, they are normal, and ur bodies way of trying to keep you safe... fight or flight... trying to watch out for any danger and protect you.

I think it's great that ur parents know , but the reality is that sometimes they may not know exactly how to help or where to advise you to turn.

It's a good idea to find someone to talk to who is known and really good at assisting with sexual abuse and trauma for women and girls.
Maybe a female therapist/psychologist or counsellor who has a good reputation? Do u know anyone who has seen a psychologist or cousellor that u could ask, who may be able to recommend one to u?

Then a Gp wouldbe needed, to refer yuo to the psychologist.

Another good person who might be able to help with this is a Social Worker. They can be accessed for free through community centres like Cohealth.

There are places you can go, Ash, where you will be listened to, and helped. It may not take the first try to find the right person who will listen to u and believe you, but I can assure you tht when u find them, it'll be amazing!

You can also call KidsHelpline to speak to someone who understands and cares, and help you understand and process all that ur going through. Sending you care and hope.

PTSD and Sexual Assult- I need advice

Ashs — Tue, 04 May 2021 07:58:06 GMT

Hello!,

Thank you so much for responding and giving me advice. Glad to know that everything happening is normal and my bodies reaction to feeling unsafe. I do have friends at school who have/are seeing a therapist and psychologist so i will ask them for recommendations. Thank you so much for everything! I plan on talking to my parents and seeing if I can go see someone for help.

- Ash x

PTSD and Sexual Assult- I need advice

Ashs — Tue, 04 May 2021 08:04:47 GMT

Hello!,

Thank you so much! It's defiantly hard to talk about what happened so i'm glad i posted on here to talk to people like you. I am also very sorry about what happened to your daughter, and i hope shes now doing okay. Your a great mum for helping her heal and get through whatever she went through. Thank you for sharing her story! it definitely gave me an idea on what might happen if i do go and see my GP so i am a little less stressed now. I do feel fine talking to my GP, i just feel like my problems aren't 'big' enough and that they don't matter and maybe the GP will say that i'm fine and that nothings wrong (and even though that's good) i know that how i'm feeling isn't good for my mental health. I plan to talk to my parents about going to see someone for help. Will keep posted. Once again, Thank you so much for everything!

- Ash x

PTSD and Sexual Assult- I need advice

AndrewXyz — Thu, 06 May 2021 14:04:17 GMT

Hi Ashs,

I am very sorry to hear what happened to you, and also that you feel like your problems aren't big enough. I think that may be part of the problem. I think people get bullied or abused because they have been treated like their opinions don't count, or they don't matter as much as other members of their family or society. It makes it hard to speak up about abuse, and other issues.

None of this was your fault. This was all on your cousin. No one has the right to abuse anyone else - period. Your cousin did not respect you, and you deserve to be treated with equal respect to anyone else.

I see PTSD as our intuition reminding us that we have a major issue we need to deal with. If you don't fully realise that you did nothing wrong here, and you are not 100% confident you can stand up for yourself, I think your intuition will keep reminding you that you need to fix this. Both women and men have a right to say i do dont want to be treated this way. If someone doesn't respect that, you are never the one at fault, all consequences are 100% on them.

I hope all goes well.

PTSD and Sexual Assult- I need advice

Guest_1643 — Thu, 06 May 2021 14:27:19 GMT

hi Andrew, your post has really blown me over in how amazing it is - thank u

ur so right

part of abuse is making ppl doubt themselves.

Thank u for sharing

Good luck Ash

We are here to listen along the way if you need any support at all, no question or comment is too much. Please feel free