https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/ptsd-and-trauma/still-recovering-from-an-abusive-relationship/m-p/22628#M1320 <P><SPAN style="font-size: inherit;">It's been a year and half now since I finally left, when it finally became too much. Which you might realise was about the same time the pandemic hit. The problems began well before then of course, what I didn't realise at the time was that his failure to get the medical and mental health help he needed was because he was in hiding. The guy I spent six years with, that I spent a good portion of that time trusting, loving, caring for, was actually on the run from the police and had been doing so for a good ten years.</SPAN></P> <P>I am still in the slow process of understanding just how he slowly manipulated me and healing from that, learning from it so I know and aviod the signs if it ever happens again and also undoing the damage he has done to me on a mental and emotional level. It's hard because I had built up such a picture in my mind of how things should have gone. I feel like I am grieving and I am greiving the dream, if that makes any sense and I am dealing with the depression that is a result of the fact my life at 40 doesn't look remotely like the one I envisioned.</P> <P> </P> <P> </P> Wed, 16 Jun 2021 14:50:14 GMT Mar8ie 2021-06-16T14:50:14Z https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/ptsd-and-trauma/still-recovering-from-an-abusive-relationship/m-p/22628#M1320 <P><SPAN style="font-size: inherit;">It's been a year and half now since I finally left, when it finally became too much. Which you might realise was about the same time the pandemic hit. The problems began well before then of course, what I didn't realise at the time was that his failure to get the medical and mental health help he needed was because he was in hiding. The guy I spent six years with, that I spent a good portion of that time trusting, loving, caring for, was actually on the run from the police and had been doing so for a good ten years.</SPAN></P> <P>I am still in the slow process of understanding just how he slowly manipulated me and healing from that, learning from it so I know and aviod the signs if it ever happens again and also undoing the damage he has done to me on a mental and emotional level. It's hard because I had built up such a picture in my mind of how things should have gone. I feel like I am grieving and I am greiving the dream, if that makes any sense and I am dealing with the depression that is a result of the fact my life at 40 doesn't look remotely like the one I envisioned.</P> <P> </P> <P> </P> Wed, 16 Jun 2021 14:50:14 GMT https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/ptsd-and-trauma/still-recovering-from-an-abusive-relationship/m-p/22628#M1320 Mar8ie 2021-06-16T14:50:14Z https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/ptsd-and-trauma/still-recovering-from-an-abusive-relationship/m-p/22629#M1321 <P>The important thing is that you're out of that relationship now and you are safe.</P> <P>40 is the new 30, you've got plenty of life in you.</P> <P>Put yourself back out there, hop on a dating app....and just chat to people...don't have to meet anyone.</P> <P>Get your confidence up and take it from there.</P> Thu, 17 Jun 2021 05:39:16 GMT https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/ptsd-and-trauma/still-recovering-from-an-abusive-relationship/m-p/22629#M1321 Guest_7403 2021-06-17T05:39:16Z