topic How do you I cope with the nightmares... in PTSD and trauma

How do you I cope with the nightmares...

Dayne — Mon, 15 Oct 2018 21:12:32 GMT

Hey all,

First time poster and new to the community. I'm a 27 year old new father to a beautiful 9 month old girl for context. Going through the motions of a diagnosis at the moment and my GP recommended I come here for support and advise. The nightmares are starting to really get to me, my partner also snores like a demon and I often have to resort to sleeping on the lounge, and when I finally DO get to sleep, I wake up almost every hour, heart racing and covered in sweat.

How does everyone cope with their demons when asleep? Previously in my life I have abused drugs to escape and get a decent nights sleep but with the kiddo now hanging around I really don't want to resort back to shit like weed to get a decent nights sleep. Would appreciate any recommendations.

How do you I cope with the nightmares...

Croix — Tue, 16 Oct 2018 12:00:26 GMT

Dear Dayne~

I'm afraid nightmares, broken and less sleep, being awake for long periods just lying there, plus all the factors associated with tiredness as a result are a common legacy of PTSD. (I get grumpy and a brain full of cotton wool)

I have found as time has gone on that nightmares become less frequent and less potent. Nowadays the only come after a period of high stress or if an event is itself too reminiscent of the past.

Ive’ tried all sorts, and sadly have not always found my partner’s comfort helped (I’m not complaining, she is marvelous.) I guess the normal sleep hygiene things can help, though for me at least it has been the devastating effect the dreams have had on wakening that has been the worst thing. Used to be frightened to go to bed.

One thing I do is have set rigid routine on waking, no exceptions. If my wife is still asleep I’ll quietly get up and make a hot drink. At the same time, I’ve had some success with writing down the dream (no great detail needed) and then tacking a happy or different ending on the end. This might sound very silly, of course what has happened is fixed, however perhaps it is the act of writing and trying to mentally conjure up a happy scenario to end it that make the difference -dunno.

A helicopter full of water on the way to a bushfire has helped when the pilot pressed the release button while he was in a daydream was one such scenario. Then I started to wonder what the pilot might have been day-dreaming about. Occupied the mind quite well.

So give it a try, can’t hurt. I destroy my writing after, do not want reminders around.

Ear plugs have enabled me first wife to sleep with me, I snore.

I believe there is some specific medication that may assist - ask your doctor.

Sorry I’ve no magic fix, treating the underlying PSTD and associated illnesses is a sensible approach. You are not alone though

Croix

How do you I cope with the nightmares...

MsPurple — Tue, 16 Oct 2018 13:46:37 GMT

HI Dayne and welcome to the forums.

Croix has gone over some things I was also thinking about recommending such as sleep hygiene and earplugs (I use them when needed if someone snores, I have a snoring dog haha).

I told my psychologist I have very vivid dreams, sometimes disburbing and nightmare like. She told me to write down my dreams in a journal or on my phone (I use a free app called journal, I can just write two line summery and I don't have to turn on light or find a pen). I discussed it in therapy. I found it really helpful. We kinda broke it down. It was things we could work like feeling of being held down etc. Maybe this could be something to try. I found talking about them and breaking it down actually helped reduce those kinda dreams.

Sometimes if I have a bad dream I may watch a quick 2minute youtube video (usually a dog video, they usually make me feel better). I find this helps calm me down after a bad dream.

How do you I cope with the nightmares...

Ell43 — Tue, 16 Oct 2018 23:33:08 GMT

Hey Dayne,

Firstly congratulations on the birth of your baby girl! You must be so proud, and I'm glad to hear you feel like abusing drugs isn't really going to work for you now because of the bub. Sounds like you're a very responsible caring dad!

The advise mentioned above is great, and obviously comes form people with very similar experiences.
The only thing I was going to add is that our brains are very clever, and when there are things in our lives we refuse to let in or deal with when we are conscious, out brains find a way to make us deal with them in our sleep (super annoying). Not saying that because you dream about a tsunami its directly related to a fear of water (would be great if our brains made it that obvious to us). But more general stress/anxiety/unhappiness ect can result in . nightmares and poor sleep.

I guess my point is, maybe if there is something in your life thats causing you any sort of anxiety, even if it seems minor or unrelated, potentially addressing these issues while your awake (go see someone about them) could lead to less bad dreaming. Might not be accurate for you, but also, could it hurt?

Poor sleep and babies is also a classic combo. Hang in there, hopefully it will get better (or at least your partners snoring might as she starts getting back into a more regular routine?)

Ell