topic Re: Mystified by Life and the Tragedies that Occur to Decent People in Depression

Mystified by Life and the Tragedies that Occur to Decent People

Loveanimals — Sun, 19 Nov 2023 02:24:17 GMT

Our police commissioner's son was run over on Friday night. The driver fled the scene but was caught. The dear son has died. I am heartbroken for this lovely man, his wife and family. He is an astounding person. He has dedicated his life to police work and the greater good. He lost a colleague on Thursday night due to a shooting incident. Then this the night after.....I am so upset and devastated for him.

Both perpetrators are unharmed. How? Why? I just do not understand! This happens all the time! Good and decent people are killed and the criminals never get their come uppance! I am believing there is a better place where these poor innocent victims go when their lives are destroyed by these so called humans. I believe in karma. I can't deal with this world at present. Too many unbalanced and disgusting events occur and I never see justice. The same goes for the poor innocent animals and children who get abused and neglected and never get the response they need!

I find this world a vile place. And it is all due to so called humans. The so called justice system. The 'people' who do not deserve a life. Agh. Sorry to vent but I am so seriously distressed and wonder how others deal with this constant bombardment of evil and despair.

Re: Mystified by Life and the Tragedies that Occur to Decent People

white knight — Sun, 19 Nov 2023 07:20:22 GMT

Hi again LA,

One of the many things my therapist asked me way back in 1987 was "Tony, when are you going to stop saving the world". It was an interesting question and it prompted me to look at my life closer and figure out how to run my life so I could survive with less anxiety.

So, I used to be heavily into all politics, the royals, climate change and many other things. Now I'm more measured in order to safeguard myself.

When I worked as a prison officer 40 years ago I had prisoners discharged only to return the next week. In fact one fellow assaulted a policeman so he could return on the basis- "I've got my mates here and I'm certain to get 3 meals a day". If jail was bad he wouldnt have returned. Therein lies on issue plus overcrowding of jails that has always been a problem. Bare in mind jails without riots dont gain votes, jails with riots lose votes.

So, we are in life to enjoy it not focus on the issues we cannot control. We can do our bit eg recycling, no smoky heaters etc but we are limited with climate change until China and India change their policies imo. So, worry will give you ulcers but not make a difference to the planet.

All these things should be measured with wisdom. Yes, feel empathy for a slain policeman, sure, send a letter, a card, a poem as I do sometimes, but to take it steps further and get angry, annoyed about the bad side of life is to open up your vulnerability to a point whereby it will not do you any good at all. This is the purpose of therapy, to get things into perspective and learn to be concerned but not worry, to be mindful but not disturbed... to be thoughtful but not crowd your mind with numerous topics that dont benefit you.

If you walk around the block you could return with all these issues in your mind, or you could have missed the wattle bird collecting nectar and the old lady struggling to carry her groceries inside. Your empathy is gold, its in you LA, you are wonderful... use the wonder.

DEVOTED FRIEND

What a companion he must have been
to the battler at the edge of town
A clever wolf looking German Shepherd
with a coat of golden brown

At night he guarded by his bed
but never did he bark
he'd only growl at the bungling burglars
as they approach him in the dark

Evil eyes had watched the miser
and desired his hidden cash
all along the dog would alert
his master to the fact

Then one moonlit night
they blazed away with a gun
they planned the robbery of their lives
preparing for the night to come

Strange how legend has it
that at night when there be evil men
the old man safe into sleep
while the dog still guarded his den

If ever shadows approached his house
a haunting spirit chases them away
the masters dog stands on a hilltop
and howls the night away.....

TonyWK

Re: Mystified by Life and the Tragedies that Occur to Decent People

Ggrand — Sun, 19 Nov 2023 09:39:07 GMT

Hello Dear Loveanimals,

I don’t watch or listen to the news now for over a number of years, I don’t really know what goes on in this world unless someone tells me….I am heartbroken for the Police Commissioner and his family….it’s so very sad listening to that…I have been told many times that I should listen to the news and what’s happening in this world….but it’s too distressing for me…..so I just don’t….

I agree that so many bad people get away with way to much, while innocent peoples lives taken from them or their lives destroyed, it’s so very wrong…I’ve seen it many times throughout my life, lived through it, survived through it, my soul destroyed by it…some people can be so cruel and evil…..

The world can feel like a vile place, but there are so many good people in it, that does make the world a better place, problem is, we never hear about them much at all….it would be beautiful to have a half hour of news showcasing the good that is done in this world by many people….I watch animal rescue vids, which helps reassure me that there are so many kind people in this word….

Loveanimals, please if it’s possible try to avoid the news…Do we really need need to listen to the evil doings of other people?…I have made my home, my 3 dogs, my volunteer job…and here at BB, my life…these are the things that I feel mostly safe in….Am I wrong in keeping my world small?…I’m not sure, but I do know that animals and nature are my go too for a way to keep heal my soul……

I like very much what TonyWK has written….”We are in life to enjoy it”…We have to try to find the way we can best enjoy our life…

Thinking of you Dear Loveanimals, with kindness and care..

Grandy..

Re: Mystified by Life and the Tragedies that Occur to Decent People

Loveanimals — Sun, 19 Nov 2023 20:43:44 GMT

Dear Tony

Thankyou again for your wonderful words (and the lovely poem). I know I have to take a step back. I have been trying all last week to rescue some birds who were kept in a shed, I spent hours on the phone to the RSPCA etc and at the end of the day they did nothing. A friend and I dealt with it another way and the birds are now safe. That situation alone caused me a great deal of angst and when these other horrible situations occurred I truly felt like giving up.

Being such a sensitive person I will always struggle with life's awful realities. However I do also very much appreciate nature and the lovely things in life. Whereas I know many people who just mill along not feeling much either way.

xxxx

Re: Mystified by Life and the Tragedies that Occur to Decent People

Loveanimals — Sun, 19 Nov 2023 20:46:29 GMT

Dear Grandy

Thankyou so much for your words of wisdom. I do try to keep my life small and safe. It is a difficult thing to do when one is bombarded whenever one turns on the tv or looks at social media. Which I know I need to avoid. I guess I have to remind myself that if there is nothing I can do about the situation I have to let it go.

I have a lovely son and a dear little cat and they bring me much happiness. As do doggies when I see them out and about....I absolutely love dogs so much. I love all animals but doggies in particular!

xxxx

Re: Mystified by Life and the Tragedies that Occur to Decent People

therising — Sun, 19 Nov 2023 23:06:47 GMT

Hi Loveanimals

You are such a truly beautiful deeply caring deeply feeling person. Sometimes I imagine what the world would feel like if there were more of your sort in it. It would be such a loving world, so heartfelt, with far less sufferance and far more inspiration. Such a beautiful intensely soulful world.

How to deal with a world that's not entirely like this can be so incredibly strategic. 100% agree with Grandy when it comes to having to manage the news, which is something I do myself. I don't watch it or read it unless I absolutely have to, for one reason or another. For people who know me, they know they need to feed me an edited version at times. I've found the news typically promotes a sense of helplessness, a sense of hopelessness, a sense of separation between people and a whole stack of other things we can sense in the way of what's depressing and stressful. While some of it's positively informative, generally fear sells. Anger sells. What's depressing or upsetting sells. It all sells papers and I prefer not to buy, for mental health reasons.

I've found being sensitive also means having to manage the imagination. A clear and brilliant imagination comes with challenges. It's like if the media can lead you to imagine horrible abuse and you imagine that abuse so clearly to the point where it makes you physically ill, the imagination proves itself to be not just part of a mental experience but a physical one as well. A well managed nervous system relies partly on a well managed imagination. Great leaders of the imagination, like Tony, can lead us to imagine a wattle bird collecting nectar or we can be led to imagine an early morning dew drop on a nasturium leaf and how it appears diamond-like in it's simple beauty when the sun hits it. We could be led to imagine so much beauty in life when our imagination is guided to beautiful places or great solutions that we can be led to clearly see in our mind.

While I can only begin to imagine the overwhelming sufferance of the police commissioner and his family, involving the kind of feelings that are just the tip of an iceberg that holds so many painful emotions for them, what I can fully imagine is the outpouring of support they are receiving and how much love is involved in that, which Tony touches on. And with Tony speaking of measurement in relation to wisdom, management and perception, I've found volume and frequency to be a part of measurement when it comes to managing the ability to sense so much (aka heightened sensitivity). Too much upsetting news too often can become unbearable. On the other hand, the amount of joy that can be found in frequently being led to imagine all the good that's being done in this world can mean connecting with the kind of people who can lead us to see it all clearly. ❤️

Re: Mystified by Life and the Tragedies that Occur to Decent People

white knight — Mon, 20 Nov 2023 00:33:20 GMT

As a former ranger I dealt with the RSPCA a lot. That organisation has few funds and therefore rely on council rangers to do preliminary checks on reports of injury/poorly fed/poorly looked after animals like dogs, horses, sheep etc. City based imagine the cost of a person driving 5 hours one way to check on an animal only to find it is ok, then 5 hours back.

So, it is beneficial to always give a benefit of the doubt. Also we humans must, as you did with those birds, take charge and do our best to save them.

As for sensitivity, Google - Highly Sensitive Ppeople. up to 20% of all people are over sensitive, but its a gift, think of all the animals that will be saved and loved by you? Without my poetry from my sensitivity, I couldnt write any.

There is positives in all negatives. Like this-

PINKY THE PIG

Pinky the pig began to cry

Pinky didn’t have a curly tail

Like the others in the sty

They laughed aloud the other piggies

While rolling in the dirt

They didn’t think for a moment

-the level of their hurt

Then one day the other piggies

Fell into deep mud- such stink!!

All of them were stuck

Except pointy pinky pink

Then with a smile

and a wagging straight tail

pinky pointed at them with glee

pinky pulled them all to safety

finally they were free

So legend has it that pinky was heroic

And the other piggies began to cry

They all wished they had a pointy tail

And were special in the sty…

TonyWK

Re: Mystified by Life and the Tragedies that Occur to Decent People

Loveanimals — Tue, 21 Nov 2023 02:51:21 GMT

Thankyou so much. Your lovely words resonate with me. I will never change. Today I stopped traffic to rescue some ducks crossing a road. I was so warmed by other drivers cheers and waves! I have to remind myself of the good people and the general good in this World. xx

Re: Mystified by Life and the Tragedies that Occur to Decent People

Loveanimals — Tue, 21 Nov 2023 02:53:47 GMT

Oh Tony you are wonderful xx What a lovely poem!! Yes I have saved hundreds of animals over the years and will continue to do so. I recognise there are many others like me. I have to stop trying to save the entire planet. I will definitely work on my reactions and my options when I get so upset. xxx

Re: Mystified by Life and the Tragedies that Occur to Decent People

white knight — Tue, 21 Nov 2023 10:26:05 GMT

You are wonderful! Your love of animals is a true sign if your character. A friend of mine recently joined the RSPCA as a volunteer, she loves it.

When we lived in the mountains we took all injured wildlife to a young woman that cared for them until released. Consider a future with animals!

LITTLE FEATHER

Little feather left and right

as you fall slowly in the night
coming from a nest above
bed of twigs and a world of love

Down you fall to the ground
A gust of wind to toss you around
then as the sun rose to dry you out
the lighter you were to get out and about

Then along came a bird full of love
to take you feather to her nest above
where little feather was put in a nest
to warm the heart where baby bird rests....

THE BLACK WIDOW

The male black widow spider
Tried all his life
He tried to tickle the hairy legs
Of his larger black widow wife

Years went by but not a smile
She too stern to let him know
That all the while she laughed inside
But to him she dare not show

He started telling jokes
A story line so grouse
But try all day he wouldn’t succeed
in a laugh from his hairy spouse

Finally he had a win
Something at last to gloat
His wife began to laugh aloud
As his leg slid down her throat

Poor little male black widow
Was sure to get into strife
All because he didn’t understand

The nature of his hairy wife…..

TonyWK

Re: Mystified by Life and the Tragedies that Occur to Decent People

Loveanimals — Thu, 23 Nov 2023 07:38:54 GMT

You are so kind, clever and witty! xxxx

Re: Mystified by Life and the Tragedies that Occur to Decent People

Loveanimals — Thu, 23 Nov 2023 07:49:21 GMT

You are so kind. The World would be a marvellous place if I had any say. You totally understand me. How I wish I could meet with you, Tony, Grandy: all of the beautiful people on this site who have gone out of their way to help me.

I appreciate every word you lovely people say to me. I will always be that caring and highly sensitive person. I am makng a huge effort to remove myself from situations I can do NOTHING about; even if those situations make me despair. The last two years have been particularly harsh. I do understand that I am having to deal and I am definitely learning! Thankyou for everything. xxx

Re: Mystified by Life and the Tragedies that Occur to Decent People

therising — Thu, 23 Nov 2023 19:23:25 GMT

Hi Loveanimals

Managing sensitivity can be challenging to say the least. Graduating to different or higher levels of sensitivity definitely comes with huge challenges. It's like you can start off as fairly sensitive and then graduate to very sensitive before graduating to intense sensitivity and finally an overwhelming level of sensitivity. Once you get to overwhelming levels, you know it's time to do something about it. The quest, with all it's questions, begins. 'How do I manage feeling so intensely? What are feelings? How do they impact me mentally and physically? Who can help me develop skills in managing? How do I learn to switch off or raise the volume on my feelings, so I can get a better feel for what's going on?'. The list of questions can feel never ending. A strange way of looking at it perhaps but you could say 'As I gain my super power (the ability to feel so easily and so intensely), how do I manage that much power?'.

I smile when I think of the movie 'Shazam'. Not sure if you've ever seen it but there's an amusing scene where the main character and his friend are experimenting with the main character's newfound abilities. While some experiments yield impressive results, while all going right, they also find the problems involved in not having yet mastered certain abilities. I've found sensitivity to be a little similar, in regard to the mastery side of it. It's like I could ask you to tell me who out of the 50 people I put you in a room with feel like depressing people, highly stressful people and arrogant people and who out of those 50 make your soul sing who you feel an instant connection with. In this test I'd know who's who but the challenge is for you to work it out. If you're sensitive enough, you'll score of 50 out of 50. You'd be able to feel everyone's nature. A seriously impressive ability. But then if I was to ask you to completely switch off from feeling them, could you do it? Do you have the ability or is it an ability you need to develop as a feeler?

Personally, what I like about the mind/body/spirit approach is the opportunity to see myself from 3 different angles. While the fields of psychology and biology/chemistry have many good points, these areas of practice don't always take into account the natural side of things. While practitioners may say 'You're too sensitive and that's a metal/physical problem or fault', from the 3rd perspective (a more soulful one), it can be more so 'You have an incredibly strong ability that requires in depth understanding and mastering. Now where do we begin in the ways of knowledge and self mastery?'.