https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/depression/how-did-i-get-here/m-p/537026#M46889 <P>I’m normally a bubbly, lively person with so much energy and enthusiasm but the last few years have sucked that out of me. On the outside, people think I’m ok but on the inside I’m falling apart. I’m always tired and constantly so sad. I’ve been knocked back too many times. I have no job satisfaction. I have financial stress and live on my own. I am so lonely and I feel the loneliness every single night. I struggle to get quality sleep or even sleep at a reasonable time. My relationship with my parents is not great at all. My mother is a narcissist and has affected me in so many ways. </P> <P><SPAN style="font-size: inherit; -webkit-text-size-adjust: 100%;"> I am not me and I haven’t been me in a very long time. I have had so many breakdowns and feel like such a burden. I feel like hiding or running away. I just want to disappear sometimes. I need to find a way to get through this because it is draining me. </SPAN></P> Wed, 10 Feb 2021 11:37:09 GMT Lonely91 2021-02-10T11:37:09Z https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/depression/how-did-i-get-here/m-p/537026#M46889 <P>I’m normally a bubbly, lively person with so much energy and enthusiasm but the last few years have sucked that out of me. On the outside, people think I’m ok but on the inside I’m falling apart. I’m always tired and constantly so sad. I’ve been knocked back too many times. I have no job satisfaction. I have financial stress and live on my own. I am so lonely and I feel the loneliness every single night. I struggle to get quality sleep or even sleep at a reasonable time. My relationship with my parents is not great at all. My mother is a narcissist and has affected me in so many ways. </P> <P><SPAN style="font-size: inherit; -webkit-text-size-adjust: 100%;"> I am not me and I haven’t been me in a very long time. I have had so many breakdowns and feel like such a burden. I feel like hiding or running away. I just want to disappear sometimes. I need to find a way to get through this because it is draining me. </SPAN></P> Wed, 10 Feb 2021 11:37:09 GMT https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/depression/how-did-i-get-here/m-p/537026#M46889 Lonely91 2021-02-10T11:37:09Z https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/depression/how-did-i-get-here/m-p/537027#M46890 <P>Hey Lonely91, welcome.</P> <P>I'm sorry to hear about all of that. I struggle with loneliness too.</P> <P>I wish I could offer some advice, but just know I care and I'm here for you, I'll try my best to support you.</P> Wed, 10 Feb 2021 11:40:24 GMT https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/depression/how-did-i-get-here/m-p/537027#M46890 Guest_4643 2021-02-10T11:40:24Z https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/depression/how-did-i-get-here/m-p/537028#M46891 <P>Hi Lonely91</P> <P>Welcome to the bb forum and thank you for sharing your story.</P> <P>I’m sorry that you’ve been struggling for such a long time. Last year was really tough for all Australians, so I’m not surprised if your mental health condition has been exacerbated.</P> <P>I hope it was comforting to hear from mb20lover—you are not alone.</P> <P>I’d like to suggest that you make a double appointment with your GP to talk through your symptoms and how you’re feeling. If it were me, given your tired, I’d ask for a blood test too to rule out any physical condition. </P> <P>Your GP will be able to recommend the next steps. This may include preparation of a mental health plan, which will give you access to subsidised psychological treatment. </P> <P>It is possible to get “you” back. With the right treatment it can get better. Hang in there. Post any time.</P> <P>Kind thoughts to you </P> Thu, 11 Feb 2021 10:38:09 GMT https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/depression/how-did-i-get-here/m-p/537028#M46891 Summer Rose 2021-02-11T10:38:09Z