topic Do antidepressants make your life less stressful? in Depression

Do antidepressants make your life less stressful?

BlissfulPilgrim — Fri, 25 May 2018 09:19:27 GMT

I know some people suffer from depression as a chemical imbalance, and others are depressed because of their circumstances. If there is no imbalance, then it is unlikely antidepressants will help. Or do the drugs just make you numb so that you learn to just put up with the situation, rather than dealing with it? Like brainwashing, instead of fixing the problem you just learn how to put up with the suffering in a socially acceptable way.

Then throw in the therapist for good measure - they can tell you how even though your life is stressful, you are just dealing with it wrong. Maybe I am not dealing with it wrong. Maybe I just have TOO MUCH STRESS. What can a therapist do about that? How can a psychiatrist make your life less stressful just by talking about it? Talking doesnt change the circumstances. All the psychotherapy in the world wont make people any nicer, or the world a better place to live in.

Do antidepressants make your life less stressful?

White_Rose — Fri, 25 May 2018 11:07:45 GMT

Hello again BP

What do you think about my answer in your other thread? I do hope you found it useful.

I think there is a bit of a mix-up with your use of depression and medication.Depression has often been described as a chemical imbalance in the brain. In reality mental health professionals are moving away from using the chemical imbalance expression.

If someone is clinically depressed then the same things are happening in that person's body. We often here people say they are depressed because.... In reality they are sad, unhappy, hurt, frustrated, do not sleep well etc. because life has thrown a curve ball. While these circumstances may make for a complicated and difficult they do not make anyone automatically depressed. They certainly would benefit from help from a doctor or psychologist to help sort out the best way to manage this, they will not be given antidepressants (AD).

AD can help people to relax but not to become numb. Generally you must have depression to be given AD. It's a bit like giving someone antibiotics because they have the 'flu which is a viral infection and does not respond to antibiotics. If however you had the 'flu and a chest infection you would probably be given an antibiotic to heal the chest infection, a bacterial infection.

To go back to the vexed question of how can a psychiatrist make your life less stressful, the short answer is they cannot do this. What they do is help you to see the cause of your stress and work with you to manage that cause. If for example you believe your workplace is causing you too much stress you can leave. But if you basically like the job but think working in a different building would help to keep you healthy, then you can your employer to have the space inspected.

Everything that causes us stress is not part of a mental illness such as depression and we need to work out how we can manage these stressors. ADs are not intended to make you sleepy or numb. That is not what they are for. They do help to keep your brain under control which may mean talking with your GP to discover what you need to do. It is then up to you to get on with the job with enthusiasm. Nothing will work while you sit until you decide to take charge of your life.

Hope that answers your question.

Mary

Do antidepressants make your life less stressful?

blondguy — Fri, 25 May 2018 12:34:37 GMT

Hello BlessfulPilgrim

White Rose is spot on accurate with her counsel as usual. She has extensive experience where depression/anxiety is concerned

I find that antidepressants are not numbing or have a tranquilizing effect. My job performance increased as well as my quality of life too

Just my humble opinion.....AD's do provide us with a solid foundation on which we can heal more effectively using counseling and all the various coping mechanisms too 🙂

I hope you can stick around the forums BP....the forums are a safe and judgement free place for you to post

My kind thoughts

Paul

Do antidepressants make your life less stressful?

Unbeliever — Fri, 25 May 2018 13:29:49 GMT

BlissfulPilgrim,
Absolutely awesome question. You're a "thinker" and not a... well, you know. One of those "other" people.

I'll cut and paste something I wrote the other day on my thread that you may find relevant.

The problem with naming such a "widespread and amorphous" condition as depression as a "mental disorder" is that once someone has been "diagnosed", it often becomes their identity and takes on a life of its own, even when an individual is reacting quite naturally to stress, financial problems, loss of a loved one, or just simple confusion about a complex world etc etc.

On an individual level, if those problems and stresses are ongoing, daily and continuous, then rationally any "depressive" feelings resulting from those things will also be ongoing, daily and continuous. Therefore that would not be an "illness" as much as a person who is in full understanding of their current daily circumstances.

In this scenario, there is no "brain chemical imbalance" regardless of whether it lasts for years or even decades. Daily and continuous real life problems in your personal life that are not "happy" situations to experience... would naturally make you feel continually sad.

*Although, whether exposure to these conditions for too long a period of time would condition your brain to be depressed even after living in this daily scenario had ended and your situation had improved, that is a completely different issue. In that case... quite possibly then there could be an imbalance (this is being studied at the moment and so far is producing some interesting evidence).

Regardless, in the specific scenario you have described... then no. Anti-depressants could only succeed in altering your perception of your own real world situation. Which if your current perception was an accurate interpretation of your current circumstances... then obviously what you have described as "just put up with the situation, rather than dealing with it? Like brainwashing"... is not as far away from the truth as many people would like to admit (it scares them too much).

So unless your perception of reality is currently skewed it is likely that pursuing ways to deal with stress would currently be a far better application of your money and time.

Of course without knowing you directly and if what you "stress" about deserves that level of stress... that is mostly guesswork. Everyone is different and "knowing someone" via this medium alone is "virtually" (pun intended) impossible.

Do antidepressants make your life less stressful?

BlissfulPilgrim — Sat, 26 May 2018 02:37:38 GMT

Thanks for your replies.

To Mary and Paul - after reading your answers I feel like what I have tried to say has been misinterpreted.

To Unbeliever, my stress comes from having to move more than 40 times in less than 40 yrs and being unable to have the means to change this situation. If my relationship ends, I will be homeless, again. I have no money to spend. What I need is secure affordable housing - not to change my perception so that my current housing/income situation is acceptable. If the solution was to change my perception - then getting stoned every day is preferable to antideppressants. So, what can I DO to remove the source of the stress?

Do antidepressants make your life less stressful?

Unbeliever — Sat, 26 May 2018 06:22:43 GMT

From what you are saying, it appears that what you are "stressing" about is that you feel that you have (and have had) little to no control over the direction of your own life. That you are forced to "go with the flow" rather than have the power to forge your own path.

Believe it or not, but this may be one of the most common "stresses" effecting people currently worldwide in one way or another (although many do whatever that can to avoid thinking about it). However, I get the feeling that this is not an option for you, and even if it was... it is not an option you would want to take. This I can relate to.

Again, referring to the limited details that you have provided, it seems that what you need is a feeling of control over where you are going in your life and to have options (backups) available to you if/when things "fall apart" (which I'm guessing is what you repeatedly expect to happen because too many people have disappointed you before... am I right?).

I noticed on another thread that you mentioned about "being homeless if your relationship ends"... so I can assume that for some reason the thought of your relationship ending sooner rather than later is seriously plaguing your mind recently. Whether this is because it is a relationship that you want to escape from (but feel that you can't because you have nowhere to escape to) or because you believe that they are wanting to leave you... I can't be certain. But, again I get the feeling that this is far from the first time that you have been in a similar situation.

Do antidepressants make your life less stressful?

Unbeliever — Sat, 26 May 2018 06:23:47 GMT

Everyone makes mistakes, but in order to get control over our own lives there is a very important first step... we have to start taking responsibility for our own choices (both past and present). Only when we do this can we start to take control instead of constantly giving it away to the others that surround us (and as a bonus enable ourselves to make better choices that put us in stronger positions in our lives in the future).

I don't know how exactly you arrived in your current situation. But in order to get your control back you will need to start making choices now for your "future self"... the person you will be years from now. So that "they" will never find themselves in the position that you find yourself in now. And when I say "now", I mean quite literally "today".

The specifics of these choices you need to make I cannot say (partly because it is an important part of the process to make these choices yourself, for yourself without relying on anyone else). But I can suggest that a good place to start is by slowly building a network of people who have nothing to do with your partner at all and by putting a little money aside gradually over time to build a "backup stash" set aside specifically so that you will never find yourself homeless (or have to worry about that at all ever again).

These are just suggestions, and they are not "overnight" or "miracle pill" solutions. But surely you didn't expect them to be? Which is exactly why you need to start making choices for the "you of the future now"... so that they will not have the stresses you have now.

I hope that makes sense, and I genuinely wish you (and the future you) the best of luck.

Do antidepressants make your life less stressful?

BlissfulPilgrim — Mon, 28 May 2018 02:25:30 GMT

Hi Unbeliever,

I have been taking your suggestion seriously. My income (as an unemployed person) is $280 a week. My budget is $150 a week for rent (including water and electricity), $50 a week to repay a personal loan that I had when I was working and $80 a week for food and groceries. This budget does not include any medical, phone or pet bills, transport, clothing, dental, entertainment, relaxation, therapy, group activities, sports, birthday presents (for my son).

So, lets imagine I could save $10 a week. Then, if I was looking to be independent and rent my own place I would need first 2 weeks rent, 4 weeks bond, furniture (a fridge, a bed, maybe some towels etc) and moving costs (at a minimum). If I save for 2 years uninterrupted I would have $1040. Do you think that's enough? If I find somewhere to rent for $150 a week is $900 up front. But remember, I want to never have to worry about being homeless again. I cant really afford $150 a week - plus water and electricity. Landlords change their minds all the time - having a lease is no long term security. If they decide to sell, I could have to move again in 6 months (with no savings).

So lets imagine, to be secure, I want to buy my own home. And for arguments sake, lets say I could find a house for $100 000. I need realistically 5% deposit and 5% for costs? So only $10000. At $10 a week I can save for my own home in 19.23 years. But then again, I cant afford to live there because the rates and the insurance aren't in my $280 a week budget. And who knows what the interest rates would be like in 20 yrs.

And, in both of these scenarios, it relies on me NEVER using my $10 a week saving for medical or dental or any accident or emergency that might come up in the meantime. AND, they are both based on a fantasy, since I dont even have $10 a week.

Please, anyone, I honestly would like to know, HOW do I get in a position where I never have to worry about being homeless again?

Do antidepressants make your life less stressful?

Doolhof — Mon, 28 May 2018 02:43:56 GMT

Hi Blissful Pilgrim,

This certainly is a huge dilemma and I don't have the answer for you. If I were to leave my partner I would be in the same position as you! So I stay.

Is it possible for you to consider shared accommodation? Could you afford to share a rental property?

It is such a shame this country is not geared up differently so more affordable housing is available!

Would you be eligible for rent assistance from the Government?

Feeling like you are stuck in a situation you have little control over and don't know how to fix must be very exhausting for you! Hope you find some answers.

Cheers from Dools

Do antidepressants make your life less stressful?

Doolhof — Mon, 28 May 2018 02:46:49 GMT

Back to your original question, yes I do believe that in many cases, if the appropriate medication is given to people, than yes, antidepressants can make a huge difference in a person's life.

Medication is not the whole solution. Learning to deal with issues and stress does help too.

The medication makes it easier to cope and may help you to think more clearly so you can find solutions and not be so overwhelmed( which is understandable to feel that way in your circumstances)

Do antidepressants make your life less stressful?

BlissfulPilgrim — Mon, 28 May 2018 03:15:37 GMT

I wish people would take me seriously when I say my life is stressful!

Comments suggesting that my stress is "perceived" or that I just haven't been "responsible enough" or that I am just exaggerating or being dramatic because I want attention are just another way of people saying "your problem is not my problem, you find a way to deal with it, I am not going to change anything I do and dont ask for help because your problem isnt really important and I have done enough the rest is up to you".

If people think so little of me, maybe I should just keep my mouth shut.

Do antidepressants make your life less stressful?

Unbeliever — Mon, 28 May 2018 03:55:53 GMT

It seems that you really have been giving it some serious thought... that is good. This is how it all starts. You have even started considering the "2 years from now" future you. If you are as intelligent as I think you are then I bet that one day she will be extremely grateful to you for that.
I totally get that finding employment is hard at the moment, and trying to put aside even small amounts of money from government benefits is damn near impossible (believe me I know). You obviously understand this intimately and even forcasting your life into the immediate (2 year) future you realise the extreme limitations of your current path.
I know that this thought makes your circumstances feel even more futile. But the truth is that this is that just understanding could be more awesome than you realise...
The majority of people in similar circumstances to you currently will never understand what you have already worked out for yourself. That the path you are on and where it is headed is completely unacceptable to you anymore. In both the short term and the long term. Many people do anything they can to avoid thinking about it, which means 10 years from now there is a good chance that their circumstances will not have changed one bit.
But if you can fully embace it (and all the anger and frustration and strong emotions connected to it) and then USE it, harness it into the motivation you need to change where you are headed currently (which few people ever manage to do)... this is how you will free yourself from this cycle of crap you find yourself trapped in.
I wont sugarcoat it, it is a long path and difficult... but it can be done. But only if you decide now that the way things are headed for you is not "good enough" anymore and start planning to take control back over your own life.
Utilise all the assistance services available to you now in any way you can. But not as a way to just maintain your current existance indefinitely as so many others do... but as a launch pad to escape out of it. Get the free groceries and transport tickets from the Salvos, do the free online courses from gov providers, cash in the 10c bottles and cans, cut back on the bad costly bad habits and squirrel away any small change you can for your "emergency housing fund" for "future you".
You want control over your own destiny? Then make your plans to take it. Make sure that future you doesn't need government assistance or to rely on anyone else.
Be your own saviour. That IS "control".

Do antidepressants make your life less stressful?

Unbeliever — Mon, 28 May 2018 04:33:08 GMT

Blissful Pilgrim,

I just saw your last post. I've written you another response but it is under moderation at the moment.

I just wanted to say that I hope I haven't written anything to upset you. Everytime I write responses on this forum they are usually far over the "word limit" so then I have to go back through it and cut it down to the acceptable letter count.

This means that for my comment to make sense I usually have to delete much of the context in sentences which results in my posts being far colder, lacking emotion and more clinical than I would like and far more open to misinterpretation (I end up never liking what I post as a result... they are just a shadow of what I want to say at best).

So, what I'm trying to say is that I believe that your stresses are real and are not "perceived". When I talked about responsibility I didn't mean "blame" I meant control and I certainly do not think that you are exagerrating or being dramatic in any way.

And I believe that your problems are important.

I apologise that I was not able to make those things clear.

What strikes me most about you is your obvious intelligence... which is something that I respect more than most things.

I certainly don't think "little" of you. Quite the opposite.

Do antidepressants make your life less stressful?

BlissfulPilgrim — Mon, 28 May 2018 04:37:25 GMT

To Unbeliever,

What you describe as "control" is an illusion. It is sounds like you are suggesting that I learn how to accept what is nothing better than slavery. Man cannot live on bread alone. The scenario you describe is not sustainable. That is why I used the word fantasy.

Do antidepressants make your life less stressful?

BlissfulPilgrim — Mon, 28 May 2018 06:23:28 GMT

To Dools,

Since the goal here is to find solutions without medications and without
getting overwhelmed I will share my experiences with share housing so
you can understand my point of view.

My first time was when my mother kicked me out I lived with my boyfriend
in a caravan park for two months. Until he got bored. So he moved into a
house. With another girl.

I slept on the verandah at my mothers house for a few weeks until I
moved in with my grandmother when I was 16. It was a 1 bedroom unit - I
had a mattress on the floor in the loungeroom.

Then I rented a room with a family while I worked 3 jobs. Lasted a couple of months.

Shared a place with my step father for a while when I went back to
school. He wrote a letter to me complaining about, amongst other things,
the smell of my shoes at the front door of our upstairs unit.

Got a job interstate. Mum was happy to help me move. I got a temporary
room at a youth refuge - 10 hours away from where I grew up. My house
mates stole, amongst other things, all the jewellery my mother and
grandmother had given me (basically the only things I had of value).

Shared a house while I was working. Asked the flatmate to look after my
kitten while I went home for christmas and when I came home it had run
away. Later found out, she had given the kitten to her sister as a
christmas present.

Then I got pregnant and moved in with the father closer to home. He left when our son was 2 months old.

I shared with my brother for a while, it didnt work out.

Stayed in a caravan in my mothers yard.

Shared with my step sister.

Shared a house once where I had a room for me and a room for my son. We
both had our own mattress on the floor. I remember sleeping with 2
quilts and 2 sleeping bags and a beanie and socks in winter. And the
house was so dirty I literally had to vacuum the walls. And the yard
with the dog was so bad I could not go to the clothesline.

Then the I found a cleaner room in a share house. 3 weeks after I moved
in the guy decided to move back to Perth and I had to leave.

Shared a caravan again for a few weeks.
The first time I was in the same house for 2 yrs while I was in a relationship. Til it ended.

(Deleted about 400 words to make post fit)...
Now I am in a long term relationship again and have been in the same
place for over 3 years. I also haven't worked in more than 2 years,
which is unlikely to change at this stage.
I've got my fingers crossed.

Do antidepressants make your life less stressful?

Doolhof — Mon, 28 May 2018 07:31:52 GMT

Hi Blissful Pilgrim,

I don't have the words to respond to you. I have not walked in your shoes nor lived in your dwelling places.

Dools

Do antidepressants make your life less stressful?

BlissfulPilgrim — Mon, 28 May 2018 09:55:27 GMT

Dools,

That's OK. I'm really bad at this getting stuff of my chest game. I need practice. Thanks for listening.

Do antidepressants make your life less stressful?

Allan533 — Tue, 29 May 2018 02:02:09 GMT

The way it's been described to me is that antidepressants don't fix the problem, they just give you breathing space while you come up with strategies to manage things like stresses and perspectives. Yes, sometimes the issue is that you are literally overwhelmed with obligations and stress! But then maybe you can try to figure out ways to reduce that load when your brain isn't stuffed with anxiety/depression chemicals. I don't want to be patronising and suggest ways that might happen in your situation - you know that better than I. But things like finding people to bear some of the obligation load, or just letting some go.

I've recently started medication, and I can say that I don't feel numb or like my emotions are limited. It's more that the downslide spirals just don't happen as fast or as often, and they are somewhat easier to redirect/interrupt, which means I'm better able to deal with the situation in front of me rather than just shutting down. But that's just my experience.

Do antidepressants make your life less stressful?

Doolhof — Tue, 29 May 2018 11:24:05 GMT

Hey Blissful Pilgrim,

Express yourself any way you can. It can be hard to know what to say when you may feel so totally confused and out of control of a situation.

I just don't know what advice to offer you that will help. I live in a house. I have food on the table. I have a warm and comfortable bed. I don't have to worry about where I will be living next week or next month. Finances are poor and my husband keeps having his hours cut at work but we are still managing okay for now.

I have lived in a tent, in a caravan, in a flat with a mattress on the floor, one bowl, one cup, one plate, one set of cutlery one box of Weetbix and powdered milk as I had no fridge. That was over 30 years ago. Maybe it was easier to move on way back then. Less expensive maybe. I don't know!

I really do hope you find some solutions!

Cheers from Dools

Do antidepressants make your life less stressful?

White_Rose — Tue, 29 May 2018 17:16:29 GMT

Hello BP

I have caught up with the various responses to you and I find I am confused about what you want or expect.

Thank you for telling us your story about accommodation, it sounds horrible. Situations such as yours makes me wonder how well I would cope in your place. I think the answer is not very well. I see Unbeliever commented that it sounds as though you are expecting to break up with your partner. Is this correct? It was the way I read it also. I can understand your anxiety if this breakup was about to happen. Hopefully it's not the case.

To go back to your original question, do antidepressants make your life less stressful, I think several people have given their opinions. For me, after many years of trying different meds with various unpleasant side effects, I have finally found one that does help me to be less stressed. AD do not take away the problem or reduce the urgency or importance. What AD do for me is help me to think more clearly and rationally. We know depression messes with our brains, so regardless of the difficulties we face it is less stressful to have a more realistic view of what's happening.

I do not suggest that problem solving becomes easier or that we sit back and smile at the world while our problems settle into place. When we become more calm, whatever is happening in our lives can be addressed more realistically. This is the point I want to make. The only person that can change our lives in any way is us. We can get lots of advice and observations. We can talk to trusted others and listen to their ideas. In the end it comes back to us. What are our resources and skills and how can we use this knowledge to our best outcome.

Mary