topic Dont know what else to do in Depression

Dont know what else to do

Tearsfall — Sun, 07 Jan 2018 04:37:07 GMT

Hello

well her i am, yes just signed up , feeling lost and alone even though i have my adult children and a partner who loves me dearly. staying on top of life is becoming more difficult. So much going on and iv lost myself somewhere along the way. Im always helping others

iv given up so much to be where i am

Dont know what else to do

quirkywords — Sun, 07 Jan 2018 05:02:03 GMT

Tearsfall,

welcome to the forum. I am so glad you posted here as this is a friendly,caring and supportive place.

Many of us here can relate feeling lost because we are always helping others.

Maybe it is time to start to help ourselves and that can be hard.

If you feel ok, you can tell us a bit more about yourself.

There are some interesting thread you can read when you feel like it.

Thanks again for sharing your story.

Quirky

Dont know what else to do

Tearsfall — Sun, 07 Jan 2018 05:23:12 GMT

Hi Quirky,

really not much to tell . Im feeling too old to care, too hurt to bother.

Iv given up everything to be with my partner, my kids are all adults now. Making their way in the world. They know ill always be here for them. I work and love my job but being on contract there isnt really any job security. I have an invisible illness and have some really bad days but i keep going. I dont have a choice . Dont get me wrong i do ok , yes im a surviver but i feel iv made some wrong decisions . And i cry lots

Dont know what else to do

demonblaster — Sun, 07 Jan 2018 07:44:57 GMT

Sorry you're feeling this way darl awful isnt it

You do sound like you're really hurting hun if you want to talk & open up more you'll find no judgement &good support here

Im guessing you feeling you've made wrong choices is whats pulling you down

Glad your partner loves you dearly ☺

Dont know what else to do

Tearsfall — Sun, 07 Jan 2018 09:11:27 GMT

I guess its a build up of alot of things, iv been unwell for a couple of weeks with head ache . Been to DRs but both said different things. Chemist said she would be more concerned about the pain behind my eyes and to speak to DR bout it. My partner can be selfish and sometimes i feel im here for when he needs me 😔

loving him is what i do best . Im a true carer . My husband died alot of years ago iv been a single mum til 3 years ago.

My partners daughter treats him like crap but everyone blames him for everything but iv seen more than them.

He says hurtful things when he drinks too much . I just dont know what to do. I want to runaway but i cant afford to . Im struggling not to cry .

Dont know what else to do

Tearsfall — Sun, 07 Jan 2018 09:14:46 GMT

He is in pain too and last couple days we have hardly spoken . Im also dealing with heath issues that have come back for 3rd time n feel like no one really gives . You know i listen to everyones problems and even when im struggling im still here for who needs an ear

Dont know what else to do

demonblaster — Sun, 07 Jan 2018 09:28:29 GMT

Aghh that doesn't sound ideal how awful everyone blaming him when there's more to it that'd be hard for you to see

Are you able to talk with him about how you feel, some people you can some not aye not nice for you copping it when he drinks

You're not well doesnt sound good sorry to hear, health its so important isnt it.

I may not be here all the time got some health stuff coming up but do eventually return ☺

Dont know what else to do

Tearsfall — Sun, 07 Jan 2018 09:53:11 GMT

You know old saying " in one ear and out the other" thats what its like . Im tired of trying but im the one who stuck by him through thick and thin. Im feeling scared lost and alone

Dont know what else to do

demonblaster — Sun, 07 Jan 2018 09:55:35 GMT

Shame darl

Never alone here

Dont know what else to do

Tearsfall — Tue, 09 Jan 2018 22:33:52 GMT

Todays im really struggling emotionaly. I hate feeling like this.

At work fighting back tears is the worst feeling , worried someone will see me. I dont want to lose my job

Dont know what else to do

demonblaster — Sat, 13 Jan 2018 01:37:15 GMT

How you going today tearsfall

Is there anyone at your job you can talk too, this is too hard trying to do alone

Have you talked about your feelings to anyone, family friends etc

Sorry youre struggling

Dont know what else to do

Tearsfall — Sat, 20 Jan 2018 03:36:42 GMT

Sorry for the late reply. Iv been quiet . I had surgery a few days ago. Didnt get to rest was looking after my partner.

i dont talk to anyone much about anything, im a fairly quiet person. especially at work, my supervisor is good . But she doesnt know how bad im feeling. I just deal with life what feels like on my own. Its easier than the questions and comments

Dont know what else to do

Ggrand — Sat, 20 Jan 2018 04:11:27 GMT

Hello tearsfall,

I hope you don't mind me joining in, but I read you had surgery a few days ago and I'm hoping your healing ok.

I'm like you in many ways, that is quiet when it comes to talking with other people, feeling lonely and sad even with family around, it hurts,

Tearsfall, cry all you want to, maybe take a quiet walk somewhere on your own when your well again, and let the tears fall, crying can be a release of built up stress, we need to release stress some how.

I am so really sorry you are so sad and feel lonely, you won't be alone here in the forums, I know it's not the same as face to face talking, I am more comfortable talking in here, I can't really talk face to face, it's just to uncomfortable and daunting to me to do that. I am working on it though.

Im here for a bit if you feel like talking,

Grandy.

Dont know what else to do

Tearsfall — Sat, 20 Jan 2018 07:30:55 GMT

Hi Grandy,

thankyou. My partner has been quiet all day. I said to him about it. He said no its been me , he thought i was upset with him cause im in a bad mood . Im not in a bad mood or am i grumpy. Iv had a headache for a month . The only time i was headache free is while the general anaesthetic was still in my system. Now its worn off the headache is back 😔. He doesnt get headaches, he should think himself very lucky. He said his mum thinks its because i was worried about him. He is better now and my headache is still here. Im so frustrated. And yes if i can manage to go for a walk i will . I wish others worried about me like i do about them

Dont know what else to do

Ggrand — Sat, 20 Jan 2018 08:41:43 GMT

Hello Tearsfall,

Im so sorry about your headache, they can get powerful and cause a bad mood that's for sure. Stress can also cause headaches. Men never seem to get the headache thingy because they rarely get headaches, so they don't really understand, I think because they don't stress like women do.

With the headache....only a suggestion, I do this when I have a headache, I put a hand towel into cold water then wring slightly, then wrap around the back of my neck and shoulders. It draws the heat from the neck relaxing muscles. I think maybe worth a try.

TF, ( Tearsfall), you need to care for you first. You are important.

Have you been to your doctor at all and spoken to him/her about how your feeling with the sadness, Dr can treat the sadness and/or refer you to councillor/psych.

Wouldnt it be nice if just for once roles were reversed and the men have to care for us, that will give them a chance to understand. Ahh just day dreaming on that one.

i hope you have a good night, but I'm here if you want to talk, I'm having trouble sleeping so probably will be up late.

caring thoughts,

Grandy

Dont know what else to do

demonblaster — Sat, 20 Jan 2018 09:16:19 GMT

Hope you're recovering from surgery darl, the headache doesnt sound good thats a long time to have one, can you see GP to get something & or checked out & as Grandy said maybe you could get to see counsellor/psych to help through these hard times.

Sorry you're having a hard time hun

Dont know what else to do

Tearsfall — Sat, 20 Jan 2018 09:43:32 GMT

Thankyou Grandy, iv sern a Dr , had counselling. Got on with my life.

as for the headaches i will definitely give that a try . I generally just take pain meds and use pain patches on the back of my neck because i reckon the headaches have something to do with my neck.

Sometimes life feels a bit one sided , as sad as it seems . We just deal with what we have to. I think this unbelievable heat is playing its part in the severity of my headaches. I know my body very well and i try take good care of myself. Unfortunately when my headaches are bad i dont sleep much either .

It feels good to know there are people who care.

Dont know what else to do

Tearsfall — Sat, 20 Jan 2018 09:49:24 GMT

Yeah iv seen a Dr , in fact 2 i ended up getting a 2nd opinion . One Dr thinks its hormonal and the 2nd opinion thinks its a migraine n prescribed me 14 pills a day to break the cycle. I think its to do with my neck . But am going back to see my gp this coming week, hopefully she will do something . I have a form of arthritis in my neck , hence why i think its due to my neck

Dont know what else to do

demonblaster — Sat, 20 Jan 2018 10:33:12 GMT

Yeah they think mine are from neck, same arthritis in there, some are full blown sledgehammer HOLY GOD ones, others for days constant.

knock ya about aye, as Grandy said stress can contribute as well, hope they can sort it

Jeesh 14 pills a day crikey

Dont know what else to do

Tearsfall — Sat, 20 Jan 2018 21:58:01 GMT

Yep sledgehammer is right. I put a pain patch on my neck last night.. it helped me sleep a bit. Now im upright its coming back. I do believe stress is playing a big part but i think its my neck thats the main issue. Am starting on injections for my arthritis once i get the all clear from the Dr . Hopefully they help. Stress does strange things to us