topic Courage to Share in Depression

Courage to Share

slippery_slope — Mon, 18 Sep 2017 06:38:15 GMT

Hi,

Not sure how to start? Didnt think I'd make it this morning but it's now 3.50pm SA time and have finally made it through to the other side of these apocalyptic episodes. It's really hard to stay positive, it's always uphill battle, it's a relentless war inside the mind but I know I just have to stay alive long enough for it to pass. I'm tired, lonely, and sometimes frightened but I've hung in there again, just.

I would really give my soul to devil to stop this.

Thanks for reading.

Courage to Share

kanga_brumby — Mon, 18 Sep 2017 07:35:26 GMT

Welcome slippery thanks for posting we have faith you can last another few rounds against the evil we all must face. Each to there own monster we are in a constant battle the enemy is well entrenched. But with your allies here within the bastions of Beyond blue you have a fine chance of defeating the monster. Who will never cease to come after any one of us. But together as friends we shall win

Kanga

Courage to Share

Peppermintbach — Mon, 18 Sep 2017 20:08:47 GMT

Hi slippery slope,

I'm glad Kanga wrote such a great response- he said it well 🙂

I hear the sadness and exhaustion in your post but I also get a sense of your drive and resolve to continue fighting the good fight.

Celebrate each win. With that in mind, well done on making it through yesterday morning 🙂

Kind thoughts,

Pepper

Courage to Share

geoff — Mon, 18 Sep 2017 21:01:19 GMT

hello Slippery slope, Kanga is right, this site is where not one of us would want to allow the beast to enter and control our lives, and in saying this it does try so very much and when this happens we will do everything possible to destroy it, but remember it's been a long battle for all of us, I can't deny this and will never say that it's been an easy chore, because it hasn't, especially when we keep having relapses.
Yes it can be very lonely, no one wanting to engage with you to help you through this terrible journey, but for anyone who has struggled, we certainly appreciate those who have been there and thankfully now I can see the light. Geoff.

Courage to Share

White_Rose — Mon, 18 Sep 2017 22:13:36 GMT

Dear Slippery Slope

Hello and welcome to Beyond Blue. The above posts have said much of what I want to say to you. I will reiterate the safety of this site. No one knows who you are other than a person in pain who has asked for our help.

There are many people here who go through the same washing machine as you have. We come out the other with the knowledge we have once again survived. Each victory gives us bit more strength to get through the next episode. I have been going through this for several weeks on a daily basis. Every time I hope it's the last but I am getting stronger each time with the memory of the last time and the one before and before etc.

I have developed ways of coping and they are on a list on my fridge. It's important to have an alternative activity that you can do without the need to search for something, hence the list. For me it must be something active like weeding the garden, but I also consider craft activities as active because I need to concentrate on them. Reading is impossible but I know many find this a good alternative. I just lose concentration. Similarly with watching TV. So something that engages your mind and body.

I am so pleased you made it through another apocalyptic episode, congratulations. Being tired and lonely is almost like an open door. May I ask what you do, have you got a support group, how do you manage your fear. That last one is such an enormous boulder to get over.

I hope you will continue posting here.

Mary

Courage to Share

slippery_slope — Tue, 19 Sep 2017 05:19:04 GMT

Many many thanks for everyones support and encouragement it is truly appreciated and needed.

White rose,

All these years I had searched everywhere except where I should be searching, I am as lost as anyone could be. After 47 years 30th November 2016 I chose to isolated myself and searched inward, took the journey back to as far as I could remember to find out why I am today.

I am learning that I have me and I am also a dad for 3 beautiful adult children who I love so much.

I am facing them slowly one by one.

Pennies are starting to drop.

Courage to Share

White_Rose — Tue, 19 Sep 2017 05:30:05 GMT

It's always the last place we look. A pity we didn't look there first.

Every time I learn something it feels like a part of me has just relaxed, no need to keep knocking on that door.

One of my supports is meditation. I found that many years ago. It doesn't stop 'stuff' happening but I get back on my feet more quickly. I am learning to forgive. Not the sentimental stuff of making friends and forgetting. Some of our hurts we will never forget. Forgiving means to let go of my anger and resentment, my fears and insecurities, and where these have been caused by a specific person I need to let go of that person.

I think we will carry our scars for life but they will remind us we have moved past that hurt and healed. When I get to the end of my life I like to think it's because I am healed.

Mary

Courage to Share

slippery_slope — Tue, 19 Sep 2017 05:32:39 GMT

White Rose,

I forgot to mention that I had read a book that might help you to cope with fear.

"Fear Professionals"

It's a great insight. Everyone has fear even the people you think least likely have fear have fear. Hope you get a chance to read it.