https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/depression/anxiety-and-depression/m-p/1844#M241 <P>Hi Tonyw, welcome back</P> <P>I'm glad you posted. Tackling separation is a really hard time in our lives. I've gone through it 3 times all more than 7 years in duration.</P> <P>The grief period no one can really help you with, it is a dark time that has a process of time. However, knowing what I know now you will recover and you will find happiness. You will also bond closer to family and friends and find new friends in the future.</P> <P>I found that after about 8 weeks from separation, I could exist better if I had a project. In one case I purchased a block of land that needed clearing for a house site. I spent my spare time there cutting down trees and a bonfire where I'd cook lunch. Then I built my own house and had my kids visit and they watched it progress.</P> <P>This is called distraction. It is an amazing tool. In the meantime just visiting shopping centres and browsing (if permitted) or extending your computer ability- games or hobbies.</P> <P>Can I ask- how long has it been since separation? do you have children? Have you any close friends?</P> <P>Repost anytime.</P> <P>TonyWK</P> Tue, 21 Sep 2021 05:52:13 GMT white knight 2021-09-21T05:52:13Z https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/depression/anxiety-and-depression/m-p/1843#M240 My wife has left me she sent SMS saying I in love with old school boyfriend,I am finding it hard to see my future all I can see it's black no light at the end, any help to get me back and happy. 21 years marriage. Mon, 20 Sep 2021 11:58:08 GMT https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/depression/anxiety-and-depression/m-p/1843#M240 Tonyw 2021-09-20T11:58:08Z https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/depression/anxiety-and-depression/m-p/1844#M241 <P>Hi Tonyw, welcome back</P> <P>I'm glad you posted. Tackling separation is a really hard time in our lives. I've gone through it 3 times all more than 7 years in duration.</P> <P>The grief period no one can really help you with, it is a dark time that has a process of time. However, knowing what I know now you will recover and you will find happiness. You will also bond closer to family and friends and find new friends in the future.</P> <P>I found that after about 8 weeks from separation, I could exist better if I had a project. In one case I purchased a block of land that needed clearing for a house site. I spent my spare time there cutting down trees and a bonfire where I'd cook lunch. Then I built my own house and had my kids visit and they watched it progress.</P> <P>This is called distraction. It is an amazing tool. In the meantime just visiting shopping centres and browsing (if permitted) or extending your computer ability- games or hobbies.</P> <P>Can I ask- how long has it been since separation? do you have children? Have you any close friends?</P> <P>Repost anytime.</P> <P>TonyWK</P> Tue, 21 Sep 2021 05:52:13 GMT https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/depression/anxiety-and-depression/m-p/1844#M241 white knight 2021-09-21T05:52:13Z https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/depression/anxiety-and-depression/m-p/1845#M242 Thanks for that, I don`t have anyone as my family will not talk to me Mon, 06 Dec 2021 01:24:20 GMT https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/depression/anxiety-and-depression/m-p/1845#M242 Tonyw 2021-12-06T01:24:20Z https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/depression/anxiety-and-depression/m-p/1846#M243 <P>Hi</P> <P>I'd personally seek out a therapist even a GP and have a chat. I hope you find peace.</P> <P>TonyWK </P> Fri, 10 Dec 2021 05:09:11 GMT https://forums.beyondblue.org.au/t5/depression/anxiety-and-depression/m-p/1846#M243 white knight 2021-12-10T05:09:11Z