topic Confused & lost in this roller coaster... in Depression

Confused & lost in this roller coaster...

abby754 — Sat, 26 Mar 2016 03:03:53 GMT

Hi Everyone.

I am new to this forum. thank you for having me here. I hope as well as receiving advice and support that I can also give helpful advice and support as well.

I am currently feeling a bit "All over the place" at the moment. and my mind is constantly trying to break me down. telling me, i'm hopeless pathetic and worthless, then other times I feel okay, not on top of the world but just okay - I am just wondering does anyone else have this experience with depression or any other mental illness, okay one day, rock bottom the next.. ? It's as if I am caught in a whirl wind that is my mind. its exhausting and confusing. but most of all i feel like i should be able to be 'good' 'happy' all the time. and i'm not.

any words would be greatly appreciated. is it normal to feel quite all over the place?

Thanks everyone.

Ab

Confused & lost in this roller coaster...

kanga_brumby — Sat, 26 Mar 2016 03:33:26 GMT

Abs that's most of the people in here me included. It is just a matter of getting all the little droughts to get into some form of formation and keep on going on. Not easy, I know but there are prople here who will try to help there best

Confused & lost in this roller coaster...

pipsy — Sat, 26 Mar 2016 04:38:47 GMT

Hi abby754. My name is Lynda. I too suffer depression and - yes, there's times when I'm on top of the world, other times for no apparent reason I could burst into tears. I think the thing to try to focus on is the fact that when you feel good, what makes you feel good? Is it something in particular or just a happy sensation. Perhaps when you're feeling low, write down the feelings you have and possibly, if you can, what has caused the down feeling. With me a lot of it is when I start remembering things from my dysfunctional childhood. You say you feel, hopeless, pathetic, worthless, were you told this as a child, that this is what you were? These words constantly drummed into you by ignorant parents absolutely destroy children. People tell you, forget about what happened as a child, but it's easy for others to say, harder when words are 'there' constantly. Do you have a family, children, hubby etc. How do they 'see' you? To get past these negative, soul destroying feelings, try to focus on the positive aspects of your life. Whether it be that you read, you're a good gardener, like movies, music, dancing. Other things in your life that you enjoy, you don't have to be the best at anything, as long as you get pleasure out of what you do. Start to look at what you enjoy and work on that side of things. The down side, when it comes, might stay for a while, but if you can concentrate on things you enjoy, that might help lift your spirits. Are you seeing a Dr or psychologist, are you on medication, if you are, tell your Dr about the swings in mood. You could be experiencing mood swings from meds or perhaps menopause. I would look seriously at seeing a Dr and discussing this with them too.

By the way, none of us feel 100% on top 24/7. We all have days when staying in bed is a better alternate than facing the world. You're not alone there.

Confused & lost in this roller coaster...

abby754 — Sat, 26 Mar 2016 12:45:14 GMT

Thank you for the very helpful response.
It is re-assuring to know that it is a common part of the condition. I am constantly finding my self wondering if what I am going through is norman or not.
I am finding that I will fall into a trough for a while, and then I will force myself to get out side, go for a walk or do something to feel better - however I am currently trying to find that balance, in the past I have been extremely productive and over achieving, burning my self out. I have also just come out of hospital from an eating disorders unit. so things are quite uneasy, and hard. however getting there I hope.
I have had trauma in the past, however I feel I have managed to accept it, I think that is where my feelings of not being enough / doing enough to please everyone around me.
Yes, I see a doctor, Psychologist and Psychiatrist, despite that my mind will often tell me that I don't need their help, that I am fine, and that I should just pull it together and get on with life... ehhh!?!?
Thank you for the response, I really appreciate it and to know what I am going through is common.
I hope that you are going okay.

Abby