topic Constant rejection, no future in Depression

Constant rejection, no future

MisterM — Thu, 10 Sep 2015 04:06:58 GMT

Sick of everything at the moment.

I got fired from a job in real estate 2 months ago (for not gelling with the team and not being dynamic enough).
I am most likely going to get fired from a job I have been in for a month tomorrow as I am not quick enough (as a waiter in a cafe).
A girl I like seems to not like me back (never had a girlfriend and am 31 years old, keep getting rejected)
I have started performing my songs live at open mic sessions and I suck, I can't even do the thing I love the most well.
I don't know what to do with myself. I am a big failure at everything I try.
Sick of rejections and failures everywhere.
I feel like I was a mistake being born into this world.
My medication seems to not be working lately. Feeling so low.

Constant rejection, no future

Sophie_M — Thu, 10 Sep 2015 05:48:46 GMT

Hi MisterM, it sounds like you are really struggling with the way you have been feeling recently. We understand that life can be hard at times and present it’s hurdles, but it’s important to focus on the things that have helped you manage in the past.

Focus on the positives going on for you and think about what would have to happen or change in your life for you to feel better about things. It is also really important that during this time to remember to look after yourself by getting the right help and support.It is great that you are reaching out for help and support and always know that there’s always somewhere to turn to.

From your post we are not sure if you are seeing a counsellor or therapist, but if you aren’t a GP can refer you to see one. Counselling support can be helpful in working out positive ways around thinking patterns and implementing skills and techniques that may be helpful for you. As we move through our different life stages, we encounter barriers in different areas of our life and need to make adjustments and find ways to move forward as best we can.

Talking with a psychologist can be a helpful part of this and this can be made available to you via the Mental Health Care Plan through your doctor so that you can receive 6-10 sessions per calendar year where the bulk of the bill is picked up by Medicare.

If you feel your medication isn’t being effective for you, we encourage you to speak to your GP about how you are feeling. We encourage you to try some online self-help modules that can help provide you some strategies and techniques that may be helpful for you.

You can visit a website calledE-Couch that has free online self-help modules.

It is great that you are reaching out for help and support - there’s always somewhere to turn to. If you feel you are having thoughts of harming yourself or if you feel you may act on those thoughts, it’s important that you take immediate steps to keep yourself safe.

You can call the Mental Health Service Line in Victoria on 1300 874 243 (24/7). You could also call Life-line on 13 11 14, or the beyondblue Support Service 1300 22 4636. We can help 24 hours a day, 7 days a week with counselling support, information and referrals. We also have a webchat service available from 3pm to 12 am.

We are here to support you and encourage you to give us a call during this time. It is important you look after yourself and to continue to reach out for support. Stay strong.

Constant rejection, no future

justinok — Thu, 10 Sep 2015 05:51:34 GMT

Hey mate, congrats on performing your songs live! Wish I had the balls to do something like that. What makes you think you suck at it?

Constant rejection, no future

MisterM — Thu, 10 Sep 2015 07:06:54 GMT

justinok, Thanks. My voice and guitar playing isn't as good as others I have watched. Plus someone told me I sound like a well known singer-songwriter. I don't want to be seen as a rip off artist.
I see the faces in the crowd and I think they think what is this terrible performer doing.

Sophie, the things that would need to change in life for me to feel better are not being a loser.
Simple as it may sound.
I've tried psychology, psychiatry, and am on meds.
I try my best to succeed at work and with my passion for music but I fail.
I think and approach these with enthusiasm and positivity but it isn't good enough, never.

Thank you for your replies.

Constant rejection, no future

Whiterabbit22 — Thu, 10 Sep 2015 07:43:28 GMT

Hi MisterM,

Rejection should be my middle name, I understand very well what it feels like to be rejected, not only that, but be pushed aside, over looked, friend zoned and not someone's first choice. Also, used, abused and lied to.

I have also been in and out of jobs my whole life and I am an artist and seemed to be getting nowhere. I sometimes feel like my life is a waste of time and space, no real point when I'm only existing, not really living.

And if someone has told you that you sound like a famous singer, that at least is a compliment that you don't suck at singing! lol and it definitely takes guts to get up on a stage and sing to a bunch of strangers! Good work!

What I decided to do for myself, was to move interstate. Get away from all the numbness that seemed to be surrounding me, I sold all my stuff, saved a bit of money and only brought with me what could fit in my small car. Started a new. I have only been here 2 and a half months and I have had more opportunities here in that small time with my art work than I ever had in my home city.

Sometimes, you may just be in the wrong city 🙂

I hope this helps in some way, something to think about.

Constant rejection, no future

MisterM — Thu, 10 Sep 2015 07:57:57 GMT

Thank you White Rabbit.
I am also tired of family telling me to work in jobs I am not suited to and not interested in.
My life shouldn't be just to pay the mortgage and retire.
I want to follow my heart not their dream.
They see my passion as a pipe dream and think I am a fool.
Music is my passion, I just want a job to help support that.

Constant rejection, no future

Whiterabbit22 — Thu, 10 Sep 2015 23:08:24 GMT

I agree. You should do what makes you happy, not everyone else. As you are living your life, not theirs. Strive to find a job that you enjoy, or at least are content with while you work on your passion. That is why I have had so many jobs, I will not stop until I find one that works for me and my life. You can't live for anyone else's happiness but your own.

Keep true to your passion, as sometimes it is the only thing that keeps you sane, for me anyway. If I'm feeling down and unsociable, I take my sketch pad and pens and go for a drive somewhere and sit and sketch on my own, turn my phone off, where they is no one jumping down my throat about stupid things, no one getting on at me. I find out in the hills or a nice quiet beach is best, as getting away from the hustle and bustle of city life helps me relax, it's nice a quiet and it's just me and my art. Try that next time you are feeling stressed or down, plan it for the weekend, go for a drive, take your guitar and some paper, sit in the silence of nature and let your imagination flow.

You are not a fool! People get jealous when they don't have a passion or dream of their own. Never give up what makes you happy for the satisfaction of anyone else. If they don't accept your passion, they don't accept you for who you are, simple as that I think.

Hope this helps xx

Constant rejection, no future

Dorian_Gray — Thu, 10 Sep 2015 23:11:58 GMT

Hi Mister M

I’m someone else you know what it is like to be constantly rejected in love, it hurts, and it breaks my heart that you have experienced the same. And I know what it’s like to do your best in something but you’re best is just never ever good enough. I doubt it is much help to you to know, but you’re not alone in feeling the way you do.

At least you are doing some of what you want in your music, perhaps you could think of it this way, even if people don’t like what you are singing to them, it’s not about them but about you ie you are performing in front of people for your own pleasure, to get your voice out there, to be heard, if no one listens then it is not your fault.

As to no one supporting your dream, I’m reminded of some lyrics from an old song….

“Like the north wind whistling down the sky /

I've got a song, I've got a song /

Like the whippoorwill and the baby's cry /

I've got a song, I've got a song

/ And I carry it with me and I sing it loud /

If it gets me nowhere, I go there proud”

Sing your songs proudly, even if it gets you nowhere at least you got to sing them, I don’t think you’re a fool, I think you have the guts to do what you want to do rather than what other people want you to.

D_G

Constant rejection, no future

MisterM — Sat, 12 Sep 2015 04:23:22 GMT

Thank you white rabbit and dorian gray xxx