topic I feel so inadequate to give advice and such a screw up to accept any in Depression

I feel so inadequate to give advice and such a screw up to accept any

Guest_3712 — Sat, 17 May 2014 05:07:06 GMT

Hi all,

feeling bad and feeling sad

not trying to write a poem

just don't know why or what to do

Stressless

I feel so inadequate to give advice and such a screw up to accept any

Girl_Anachronism — Sat, 17 May 2014 05:23:42 GMT

Hi Stressless,

What to do? You have already done it. Talk to us. Tell us what has been happening.

I am sitting here on my bed, watching the sun dry through my now golden hair and hoping that Sydney is out there somewhere enjoying the sunlight too. I hope she is ok.

I feel so inadequate to give advice and such a screw up to accept any

Guest_3712 — Sat, 17 May 2014 05:56:28 GMT

Hi GA,

I hope it's true for you that blondes have more fun and really hope Sydney is on her way home.

I spoke to my psych on Thursday and have been more upset and confused than ever.

I literally owe this person my life. I am torn between his advice and that of my friends here on BB.

Stressless

I feel so inadequate to give advice and such a screw up to accept any

Neil_1 — Sat, 17 May 2014 06:30:02 GMT

Hi Stressless

Wow, this psyche of yours must have produced one hell of a session for you on Thursday. And not a good one by the sound of it. 😞

I'm guessing that this is the person who thinks you perhaps shouldn't come on this site?

And again, I know we can't determine which path you want to take; all I can say, is that whenever you post here, your friends will rally around you, as best we can.

At this time, I really don't quite know what else to say as something has obviously been stirred up for you big time and now you're having to wrestle with things and when this happens, well, it's just not a fun time at all.

We're here for you Ess Elle

Neil

I feel so inadequate to give advice and such a screw up to accept any

Guest_3712 — Sat, 17 May 2014 06:51:05 GMT

Hi Neil,

Yes you are right on all counts.

our session was on the phone and yes it was intense

yes he is the person that doesn't want me to come on here as he says I can't deal with issues raised here as opposed to face to face with him

I have been in denial for a long time and only recently have started facing certain things .The trouble is issues that come up here with other people , I find also apply to me and I can't cope.

Stressless

I feel so inadequate to give advice and such a screw up to accept any

Jo3 — Sat, 17 May 2014 07:06:15 GMT

Hi Stressless

You know what you're saying about being on here and then feeling like you can't cope - that's how I feel sometimes.

And I was having the same thought - maybe I shouldn't be on here as well. I haven't really spoken to my psych about this but I'm not really sure what to do.

But Stressless, you know that we are all here for you and will always support you, no matter, we are your friends here because we care about you.

I know your life hasn't been easy and being in denial for certain things is I believe a way of trying to cope, that's another thing I do.

I hope you can stay on, but I understand totally if you don't. It's just that we would miss you.

Take care

Jo xx

I feel so inadequate to give advice and such a screw up to accept any

Neil_1 — Sat, 17 May 2014 07:18:00 GMT

Hi Ess Elle,

Well, you've got me totally stumped now. I've danced down the wicket and you spun the ball past my bat, and I'm out - GAWN. Sorry, bit of a cricket analogy there. But that's due to your reply - because it sort of gestures toward you perhaps not coming on here too much more - or - um, I'm not really sure.

I guess that can be a big issue for so many people who are on this site - and to read of others terrible experiences, and when we're not in a very sturdy frame of mind, it can really impact.

So that's why I'm stumped, because I really have nothing to offer you in this instance, because I can totally see the thoughts had by your psyche. I can also see the thoughts of me and SO MANY others where we don't want you to go. Hence, why I guess you're so confused at the moment. And by me writing this, most probably isn't helping you one bit, so I'll shut up for the time being.

Neil

I feel so inadequate to give advice and such a screw up to accept any

Guest_3712 — Sat, 17 May 2014 07:40:46 GMT

Hi Neil ( again sorry)

By trying to not say too much I have made it worse and more confusing

My psych s rationale is that when we have a session we may stir things up but at least we can try and deal with it there and then as opposed to things that come up on line

I have recently remembered something from my past that I had obviously blocked out, because of someone's post that was exactly like my story.

something I had suppressed all my life. I am scared of the road I am taking and not sure where to go from here. I love the support I get here as I can't talk to my psych everyday, but am I making myself worse?

I don't know

I'm scared

Ess elle

I feel so inadequate to give advice and such a screw up to accept any

Neil_1 — Sat, 17 May 2014 09:18:30 GMT

Dear Ess Elle

I'm really hearing you, my friend - that you are really scared by this. It's definitely not a good situation for you to be experiencing.

I feel pretty much helpless that I'm unable to give out any advice in this situation for you.

The only thing I can respond with is: with regard to the recent post that has bought back so many unpleasant memories/experiences for you - firstly I feel so bad for you that this has happened. BUT secondly, with you reading this are there any possible positives that you may draw out of this? Where the person who has posted, has obviously had people respond to their message - and with that, are you able to draw any advice/help/anything out of that??

I guess I'm really clutching at straws here and the straws aren't very long. 😞

Neil

I feel so inadequate to give advice and such a screw up to accept any

Jo3 — Sat, 17 May 2014 09:28:18 GMT

Dear Stressless

I am sorry that someone's post has caused you so much pain with reliving one of your memories that you had suppressed.

I just hope it wasn't my post because I know that our stories are very similar. But you know you need to do what's best for you and your mental, physical and emotional health.

But as Neil suggests hopefully the replies from others on that post may give you something positive to think of or look at.

Pls take care, I am worried about you

Jo xx

I feel so inadequate to give advice and such a screw up to accept any

Mares73 — Sat, 17 May 2014 23:01:14 GMT

My dear friend Stressless I'm worried about you too. And because of similarities I'm worried I've triggered a reaction. If I have please let's talk about it? You are so special & a core member. I'd miss you so much. In my heart, Mares xxx

I feel so inadequate to give advice and such a screw up to accept any

geoff — Sun, 18 May 2014 00:06:25 GMT

dear Ess Elle, let's suppose I'm new in town and ask someone 'what's the quickest way to the main shopping centre', so they tell you, but your fill up the car with petrol and ask exactly the same question to the cashier, but they tell you a different story of how to get there, so who's right, or is it 6 of one and half a dozen of the other, probably both are, so which one do you chose, but that decision doesn't really matter, because both are right in their own way.

So I know that a post may bring up bad memories and this may bring a dark cloud over you, which we are so sorry for, but isn't this getting back to problems that are hidden within yourself, and these perhaps maybe something that your psych hasn't thought of.

I appreciate that talking face to face is ideal, but are these resolutions always solved at the session, or are you sent home to consider what has been discussed and then post what you think, and what advice we can offer, and it's pretty well instant.

Just words to contemplate. L Geoff. x

I feel so inadequate to give advice and such a screw up to accept any

White_Rose — Sun, 18 May 2014 00:54:37 GMT

Dear Ess Elle

What a pickle. It must feel as though you are d..ned if you do and d..ned if you don't. I recently posted to someone that too much contact with other people's problems can be a huge drain on yourself. I still believe this is correct. This site contains a huge number of sad stories, people trying to cope with major illnesses such as depression etc.

Giving hope and support to anyone can be, and often is, exhausting. I know issues are raised in therapy sessions that cannot always be answered in the same session. They are too big or too deeply rooted. It takes time and work to get through them. Trying to help others takes away your coping abilities and resilience at a time when you most need it.

If very difficult issues have raised their heads it requires more work and effort to resolve them. I imagine that your psych is trying to get you to concentrate on your own well-being for a time and I agree with this. Not that my opinion counts for much as I am not a psych. This is my experience and my perception of others.

Perhaps now is the time to take a rest from BB and put all your energies into yourself. Regaining your own mental and physical health must be your priority. Helping others effectively requires a fairly stable and sound base. You have given of yourself quite freely but now may the time to give to yourself. You can return to BB at any time.

I hope I have helped you.

Regards

White Rose

I feel so inadequate to give advice and such a screw up to accept any

Guest_3712 — Sun, 18 May 2014 07:10:18 GMT

Hi Jo,

thanks as always for your support

no it wasn't your post, not that it would matter .

this forum must be comfortable for all to use and if someone gets upset unfortunately that is how it is . I 'm sure unknowingly I have touched on a nerve with others.

at the moment I haven't be able to draw any positives just more questions, doubts and self loathing.

sorry don't know what to do.

I don't know if I want to know anymore about myself

be kind to yourselves

Ess Elle ( stressless)

I feel so inadequate to give advice and such a screw up to accept any

Guest_3712 — Sun, 18 May 2014 07:14:33 GMT

Hi Mares,

Please don't worry about me you have enough on your plate.

it was nothing you said but like I told Jo you can't worry if your post triggers others issues, you need to feel free to vent.

I am very confused and shocked at some of the memories coming back to me

don't know what to do

just take care Mares

Be kind to yourself

Ess Elle

( Stressless)

I feel so inadequate to give advice and such a screw up to accept any

Neil_1 — Sun, 18 May 2014 07:58:39 GMT

Dear Ess Elle

Hey, it's become quite catchy, don't you think??

So your Sunday hasn't presented with any better thoughts for you? Which is no good.

You mentioned above how your psyche is dragging things up from your past - which are obviously massively traumatic for you - and his advice is they are being dragged up so then the two of you can deal with them, then and there during that session. That's quite presumptious (is that such a word?) of your psyche and almost (excuse me for saying) and almost bs. I mean, these things are so fragile for you and make you feel so uncomfortable, how in the hell does he think that by bringing them up in your session is going to be beneficial or helpful to you?

Almost sounds to me like he thinks, ok, I'll raise this during this session, we'll talk about it - and then when you walk out that door, please don't be stressing or thinking about it anymore, until our next session. I may be reading this wrong, but if I'm not, then that is absolute baloney.

What to do now Ess Elle?? I guess you've got work happening on Monday, yeah? You're there with your mask firmly in place. When is your next session with your psyche?

Gee it all sucks massively doesn't it. We have these traumas that have happened to us in the past and the upshot of that is that yes, they were in the past, but they continue to haunt us as we continue on with our lives. Enter - depression. 😞

I'm sorry Stressless, this perhaps wasn't the most brightest post for you to read.

Kind regards

Neil

I feel so inadequate to give advice and such a screw up to accept any

Guest_3712 — Sun, 18 May 2014 08:34:38 GMT

Hi Geoff,

as usual your reply is logical and gets to the heart of things.

in fairness to my psych it is hard for him to think of everything I guess as it seems each session I have a new catastrophe to deal with.

you're right .not every issue is dealt with at the session and I do go home with lots to think about usually, but the ,"OMG" moments I have with him are so enlightening I take heart that maybe just maybe I am not so crazy- maybe.

The feedback I get on here is instant yes .supportive, friendly, caring. and knowledgeable, tick, tick tick and tick.

six of one , half a dozen of the other umm not sure about that.

the folks here talk from personal experience and my psych , well he talks from a zillion years of study and 30 years of one on one treatment.

both are more than qualified but somehow at the moment they are in my case at odds with each other.

thanks Geoff- needed your cool rationale

Ess Elle

Stressless

I feel so inadequate to give advice and such a screw up to accept any

Guest_3712 — Sun, 18 May 2014 08:44:11 GMT

Hi Neil,

yes thanks love the nickname, shame I can't use it in "the real world")

Ok let me try to explain. My psych never drags things up. He waits for me to bring things up then he lets me dictate the pace. if it's something we have spoke of before then he may bring it up if in context with what we are talking about.

this is a really hard journeuy of discovery for us both. when I was first admitted to the psych hospital it was for drug abuse due to my injury/ chronic pain. it was many months before it became apparent to him , not me, that there was a lot of stuff buried that was just waiting for the right trigger to surface.

I guess my complete mental and physical breakdown was the time.

I owe this doc every thing. he saved my life so many times, literally. I have to trust his opinion and instinct, don't I ??

OMG I am so confused. I wish I could say coming on here made me feel better, but honestly most times I feel so inadequate to give advice and such a screw up to accept any.

I don't know which way is up anymore

Ess Elle

Stressless

I feel so inadequate to give advice and such a screw up to accept any

Neil_1 — Sun, 18 May 2014 08:50:46 GMT

Stressless wrote: " ... my psych , well he talks from a zillion years of study and 30 years of one on one treatment"

Neil responds with: "This guy sounds older than Catweazle (gee, I hope you watched that show back in the '70's) - get rid of him - he's too old!"

I feel so inadequate to give advice and such a screw up to accept any

Guest_3712 — Sun, 18 May 2014 12:25:48 GMT

Hi White Rose.

just saying your name brings me peace and serenity. You are very perceptive and you have accurately summarised what I believe are my doctor's intentions.

the trouble is I am so near panic at the thought of not being on this site.

the thought of endless days with no communication with kindred spirits scares me to death. my thoughts race and my heart thuds in my chest, I don't think I can be alone with the ongoing turmoil in my brain.

you have giving me much to think about thanks and

Be kind to yourself

Ess Elle