topic Why am I sad when my life is so good? in Depression

Why am I sad when my life is so good?

Welsh_Mark — Thu, 20 Nov 2014 01:30:24 GMT

I apologise now to all the people on here that have really good reasons to be going through depression but if you looked into my life I haven't got anything to be sad about....but I am?

Looking back I think I've always been a 'dreamer' looking for something else all of the time....My beautiful supportive wife says she is content with her life and is thankful that we have two stunning, healthy and well rounded children and we live in an amazing place close to the ocean with a large house and pool..Why can't I see this? I'm so cheesed off that I can't be grateful for these things and everything I do I feel what I can only describe as 'disappointed' like there is something better out there....

I have been to the GP who through no fault of their own seems like a production line of pill givers, trying to get as many patients through as quickly as possible...

I can't keep putting my family through my princessness as its not fair on them!

Anybody else felt this way and then coped with it?

Where do I begin?

Prisoner to sadness

I feel like it is getting worse every day

Living with depression

Internal sadness

Why am I sad when my life is so good?

geoff — Fri, 21 Nov 2014 00:05:02 GMT

dear Mark, welcome to the site and thanks for posting your comment.

Unfortunately it doesn't matter one iota where we stand in the community, how happy we are at home, or what we do have at home, because we could have everything that we possibly need, but all of this won't stop you or anyone else from getting depression.

It has no boundaries, no limits to where or how it will infiltrate us and then take over and completely control us, we have no choice, and it's not open for discussion, there's no difference than catching the flu, we are surrounded by people who have had it or actually still got it, so will we catch it or not, however depression isn't contagious, but it's the same principle.

OK first of all click under 'get support' at the top of this page where you will be able to find a doctor near you, and can I stress that these doctors are aligned to BB and handle people with depression, and they won't just prescribe medication and say 'sign here'.

You have to leave this current doctor, because depression requires you to have as much support as you need, and with this illness, it means a great deal, because any doctor can't be so flippant when dealing with someone suffering from depression, because it may mean that it involves someone's life, we hope not because we want to be as much help as we possibly can.

I hope that you can trust us, as it maybe a long road, but please find a decent doctor who will be able to support you through this, and we hope that you can get back to us. Geoff.

Why am I sad when my life is so good?

Neil_1 — Fri, 21 Nov 2014 00:45:58 GMT

Hi there Mark

I’d firstly like to wish you a warm welcome to Beyond Blue and would like to thank you heaps for providing your post.]

Now I’d like to say Mark, that you are on here for a reason and a big reason – YOU. Your own wellbeing and health and for you, there is nothing more important. And along those lines (I’m not being harsh here either) everyone on this site has as much reason to be here as the next person and everyone is treated with the utmost care, respect and support. You might think your reasons are nothing, compared to others, but there we stop that sentence. Why? Because we simply don’t compare anyone’s situation with another – everyone is important. And that’s why I’m glad you’ve come and posted.

As you’ve described you’ve got major positives happening – with a beautiful (but even more importantly, supportive) wife and two awesome children. Having a partner who is supportive is a real positive.

With regard to alternative sources of support and assistance, coming here is always a very good start. On these forums, you’ll find so many different posts and threads by people who are all going through different kinds of issues and being on here can be a helpful and supportive type of assistance. But also, as you’ve gone and tried – seeking professional assistance is also something that IS needed. It is a shame that you’ve encountered someone who seems to want to move his patients through quickly by supplying medication and by what you say, that seems to be about it.

On this website, Beyond Blue have a list of GP’s that can be searched – and the thing with these GP’s is that they are all skilled in dealing with mental health issues; sure they “may” supply anti-depressants if they deem that be the way to go, but they are also able to provide referrals for appropriate counselling or other kinds of support, if necessary. This could be an option to explore.

Just before I finish; other things to assist can be things like: exercise, sports, hobbies, interests you may have, things to get you out and about and occupied; walking, cycling, even fishing – trying to be in amongst the children and seeing if you can be apart of some of their interests as well.

I could write more, but I fear my word count is almost up.

I do hope you can get back to us.

Neil

Why am I sad when my life is so good?

Welsh_Mark — Mon, 24 Nov 2014 21:49:14 GMT

Thanks for the support. I have my first Psychiatric appointment today which I don't know what to expect apart from in the movies. Wish me luck.

Why am I sad when my life is so good?

Lweezuk — Mon, 24 Nov 2014 23:17:35 GMT

Hi Mark, good luck with your appointment I have my first visit to the psychiatrist tomorrow and I also have no experience except the movies!

I am mainly concerned they will turn me away and say nothing is wrong, although I'm sure that won't happen.

Maybe someone can shed some light to us on what to expect?

Louise

Why am I sad when my life is so good?

Neil_1 — Tue, 25 Nov 2014 00:57:22 GMT

Hi there Mark

I wish you good luck with your appointment today. It’s a bit late now I’m guessing, but what is often a good thing to do is to write down issues that you’re experiencing or having – dot points and so if you feel like you’re struggling a bit when talking, you can use that as a prompt for you.

They won’t turn you away, well they shouldn’t anyway. But it’s more of a process to unload what is causing you issues – and it can be anything; no matter how miniscule.

I would really like to know how you go with your appointment?

Neil

Why am I sad when my life is so good?

geoff — Tue, 25 Nov 2014 01:53:05 GMT

dear Mark and Louise, I realise that your appointment might be on now, soon, or perhaps you have already been, but for both of you these are trying to set up a repoire between you and the psych, so probably not much would have done except forming a base, which we need to do, to have the confidence to speak with them, and we hope it will or has gone well, but if you feel disappointed please don't be because it may take a few visits, and please to overcome any of your depression in what ever form it maybe it will take time, unfortunately there is no quick solution.

Please let us know how you both get on. Geoff.

Why am I sad when my life is so good?

Welsh_Mark — Tue, 25 Nov 2014 12:15:37 GMT

I had a good first session thanks...it was mainly admin stuff but I got a few pointers and I think the next one will be alot more fruitful.

Why am I sad when my life is so good?

geoff — Tue, 25 Nov 2014 12:57:13 GMT

dear Mark, that's good.

Are these pointers directing you in another way, or coping strategies, and when is your next appointment. Geoff.

Why am I sad when my life is so good?

Welsh_Mark — Tue, 25 Nov 2014 21:53:12 GMT

Mainly coping strategies...but also to write a list of my personal values so at the end of each day I can assess how I'm doing.

My next session is on the 4th Dec.

Why am I sad when my life is so good?

Neil_1 — Fri, 28 Nov 2014 02:02:18 GMT

Hi Mark

Thank you so much for keeping us up to date with how your appointments are going – and for sharing.

How do you feel you are going now? So on a scale of 1-10, since you first came here to Beyond Blue. If your score was say 2 when you arrived here, what do you think it might be now?

Kind regards

Neil

Why am I sad when my life is so good?

Feeling_Sad — Tue, 02 Dec 2014 04:25:29 GMT

Hello Mark

My life seems similar to yours - happy family and husband, 2 healthy children, no money issues, nice house, investment property for the future, but I too started feeling down at the start of 2014. I couldn't put my finger on it, but over time I realised for me it was too much social media and bad news stories breaking me apart. I couldn't handle the constant bad news and more recently reading about young children dying of cancer, which saw me spiral out of control to a state of despair. I couldn't work out how someone like me, who has never had depression, could end up like this?

I went to the GP, prescribed me drugs - took one, never again - not for me. Then got referred to a Psychologist, have been 3 times, but not sure if that is for me either. Don't really have any family support as in their eyes, I have nothing to be sad about. My friends have been great though - lots of support as so many friends have experienced depression in varying degrees - I just didn't know.

I think I'm on the road to recovery after reading a few self help books and trying to replace my sad thoughts of these poor kids dying of cancer with positive ones - it's hard, but I'm trying.

I know this probably doesn't help you much, but thought I'd share my brief story so you know there are others out there in similar situations.

Good luck with everything!