topic How does everyone cope? in Depression

How does everyone cope?

Allenm — Tue, 24 Jun 2014 01:15:08 GMT

For the last few months I've been struggling to look even my own family in the eye. I am terrified of getting out of bed and cry myself to sleep almost every night at the sheer horror waiting for me the next day. I am unemployed and have been jobsearching for over a year when I found the reason I haven't gotten a job is because my father in law (first reference on my resume) has been telling the whole town not to hire me. I feel worthless, I want to make a difference in my life, I want to change. I have been trying to call about about getting a diploma done, but every time I start to dial a number into my phone I freeze up. I just want to know what to do, I'll do anything, I just want it all to be over whatever it takes

How does everyone cope?

Lara — Tue, 24 Jun 2014 02:21:00 GMT

Hi AllenM, sorry to learn of your employment situation, unfortunately I have a few friends in similar situations too. Are you able to talk to your family more about your feelings of worthlessness, even if you can't look them in the eye? If not you will have the support of many here, I am sure.

It's fantastic that you want to make a difference and are taking that first step to study a diploma. Similarly I am taking those steps to study, the whole process triggers extreme anxiety in me, which is related to my great fear of rejection or not being good enough. I find it easier to make contact via email first, do you have that option? That way you have more time to write down exactly what you are trying to achieve, it removes a little pressure of being put on the spot should you start to experience a freeze up or panic attack. If there is no response from the email, it's useful to refer back to when calling. It takes that overpowering emotion out of it, so helps you just deal with the practicality of booking in your study. I am about to attempt one of these follow up phone calls now. Wish me luck!

Little steps, will help you achieve great things. Keep in touch. Take care,

Lara

How does everyone cope?

Neil_1 — Tue, 24 Jun 2014 03:16:21 GMT

Hi there Allen

Welcome to Beyond Blue and thank you for coming here and providing your post.

I hope I’m not going to be too blunt here, but I’m in your corner – I wouldn’t want to look my father-in-law in the eye either, if he’s such a low-life that he’d bad mouth you throughout the town. Have you spoken to him or your wife about why he’s doing such a horrible thing to you???

When I first read your story, my initial thought was to “remove” your father-in-law’s name from your resume.

With regard to your crying almost every night, have you sought out any professional assistance with regard to this? I think perhaps an appointment to a GP/doctor might be a very worthwhile thing to do. Do you think you’d be able to possibly arrange this? Or perhaps even your wife may be able to assist you with this?

But yes, I’d be very interested to hear just why your father-in-law is being so horrible to you?? I do hope you can get back to us as well.

Kind regards

Neil