topic I cant handlle this anymore!!!! in Anxiety

I cant handlle this anymore!!!!

Chloekat84 — Sun, 21 Sep 2014 06:32:16 GMT

Ive been havin some really bad days when it comes to anxiety attacks that have lasted a day. I am nauseated all the time so cant eat I don' t know what to do this is happening day after day and I cant handle it! Ive been to the hospital a couple monthes ago and know I cant go back as there is no1 to look after my daughter. Ive been dinosed with borderline personality disorder and dysthymia which is a type of depression but my depression has been really bad lately also. PLEASE just let this adrenaline feeling end!!! :'(

I cant handlle this anymore!!!!

purelight — Sun, 21 Sep 2014 07:11:50 GMT

Dear Chloekat84, so sorry you havn"t been travelling very well of late. I have experienced anxiety attacks and they are not nice. As you know, I'm also a fellow depression sufferer. Have you had blood tests done to see if your thyroid is functioning ok?I've seen a nutritionist and have discovered that I am deficient in some minerals that could easy contribute to depression and anxiety. It wouldn't hurt to try alternative ways of healing like chinese medicine or nutritional therapy. I was pretty bad for over 3 months but for the past 3-4 weeks have seen a huge improvement in mood. Not sure what has helped. Probably a mixture of medication and minerals. I also regularly do mindfulness meditation and go for walks whenever I can. Will be thinking of you. Things will get better. x

I cant handlle this anymore!!!!

white knight — Sun, 21 Sep 2014 07:31:04 GMT

Hi Chloekat,

I also have dysthymia and anxiety although for many reasons the anxiety has reduced over the years to near zero.

You explained it well (that adrenalin feeling". Horrible isnt it. So, what can you do. You can be persistent with the following-

1/ Relaxation techniques do work. Muscle contractions can be done even in bed before sleep time and it will help you sleep. Contract muscles one at a time for 15 seconds all over your body. Then at the end contract them all.

2/ Be realistic with your thoughts. Ask yourself if what you are thinking is realistic and not blown out of proportion.

3/ Dont fight your depression. I suggest you 'go with the flow'. You might be expecting too much of yourself. i.e. too much positive drive and you'll be disappointed at the outcome. Be positive when your mind can cope with it.

I have little knowledge of BPD. Hopefully someone here can help you there.

Take care

I cant handlle this anymore!!!!

Sammy14 — Sun, 21 Sep 2014 09:46:21 GMT

Dearest Chloekat84,

I know exactly what you are feeling, it's a horrible feeling and it feels like a never-ending battle to feel normal and sustain the anxiety rush, but you really are not alone and it's definitely worth trying some things to help. I'm far from cured and right now I'm off the rails with anxiety and panic thus why I'm on here, but what has helped me before and will again are the following, limited or no caffeine (this is very important), eating well, diaphragm breathing, getting up really early and running - if I wear myself out and eat well it helps me get some calm and switch off the monkey mind if even temporarily. Herbs are fantastic as well, but for me the cheapest and most effective is the getting up early and running (cardio exercise is some form to exhaustion). Sending you a virtual hug, and keep us posted please on how you are going.

I cant handlle this anymore!!!!

Chloekat84 — Mon, 22 Sep 2014 00:13:53 GMT

Well another day of similar symptoms. Im going to see a doc today cos some side effects of the new drug im taking can make anxiety worse at first ive been takin other stuff to help but its not. Im so nauseated I cant eat barely anything let alone cook a meal just the thought makes me wana be sick all ive eaten each day is maybe a muesli bar and even eating that is hard. Its soo hard looking after my daughter let alone myself. All I want is to feel normal again like I used to 4 monthes ago :'( I haven't been drinking any caffeine my tummy cant handle it. I keep hyperventilating and slow breathing exercises aren't working I just don' t know what to do anymore. I love my kids to bit but sumtimes at night I wish to go to sleep and not wake up again its soo hard every day. They did a blood test for thyroid etc and that normal and they did a head scan of my brain and thats normal so I don' t know where to turn to next. The best part of the day is at night when I eventually get to sleep but then my anxiety wakes me up every normal around 7am then I cant get back to sleep. I need help!

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I cant handlle this anymore!!!!

Amelbourneboy — Mon, 22 Sep 2014 02:48:59 GMT

Hi Chloekat 🙂

wow, you have just discribed my last 4 days. its like pure hell on my body. I know all to well the feeling. about this exact time 2 years ago i suffered what was to me a complete breakdown. My anxiety hit such a high and at the time i had no idea what it was. I had this fear, this heart pounding, stomch churning life hating excistence i was now living. At the time i was totally againts AD, but did attend a psycologist. My worst days where spent crying in fear and agony. I finally started an AD, and the last 18 months have been pretty dam good. A few bad days here and there but other wise "normal".

Untill now. Now im exactly the same as i was. Different fear, different anxiety but the same torture inside. I havent eaten in 4 days, i feel constantly sick, my heart is constantly pounding I am also becoming more shacky, Im distant. The best feeling is knowing when i sleep im at peace, the worst is waking up, thise first few seconds wondering "is it here still?"

The only solice i get is knowing I am never alone, either are you chloekat 🙂

I cant handlle this anymore!!!!

mtessa — Mon, 22 Sep 2014 07:56:41 GMT

Hello,

You are not alone. I know too well the symptoms. The last four days have been hell. Crying and panic attacks one after the others. It might be great to call the CAT team if you feel it. They are wonderful people and very understanding.

I cant handlle this anymore!!!!

Chloekat84 — Mon, 22 Sep 2014 09:23:52 GMT

Hello mtessa but wats CAT? I called the mental health line yesterday

I cant handlle this anymore!!!!

Chloekat84 — Mon, 22 Sep 2014 09:36:08 GMT

I feel exactly the same way u do Amelbourneboy. Every morning I wake up well b4 my daughter and wonder if today will be a different positive day. Everyone keeps telling me to keep staying positive but easier said than done. I do start the day thinkin positive but the anxiety starts before I even get out of bed in the early morning 😞 that's when I know straight away its gonna be another hell day. The only time of the day I look forward too is in the evening when I eventually pass out. I don't know why but I find it a whole lot easier to calm myself down in the evening once my daughter has gone to sleep. I feel bad about that but im very anxious when looking after her and shes seen me cry many times, I cant handle the tantrums etc. I know its normal for her age but I find it soo hard. Today started out not so well but I have spent the whole day around family members and I found that helped a lot just having that company and to occupy my mind with something else even if its just shortwhile. Im praying that 2moro will be a better day as I know I cant be around family every day as they have their own problems etc to deal with. Well that's it for now I guess.

I cant handlle this anymore!!!!

Sammy14 — Mon, 22 Sep 2014 10:19:13 GMT

Oh you poor love, I'm so glad you reached out to someone - it's very hard to do that but such an important step. I'm with you on the side effects of trialling a new drug, I haven't found my right fit yet and often stop them after a few days as can't cope with the side effects, being anxious makes me feel anxious and paranoid about the effects of new drugs, and so far they have all made me feel worse. The diaphragm breathing isn't for everyone and does take a lot of practice. I understand about the sleep being the most peaceful time, it's good you kept yourself busy with seeing family, sometimes you just have to try and distract yourself in any moments you can. I hope the doctor and the phone call you made have helped you to come up with a 'feeling better' plan. Thinking of you, definitely take it one day at a time.

I cant handlle this anymore!!!!

Amelbourneboy — Tue, 23 Sep 2014 01:00:14 GMT

Its those first few seconds as you open your eyes up in the morning, than the wave hits. Its the only best way i can discribe the feeling. I feel it moving in and its so instense, it will ease a little than push me back under again.

i dont have any children but when im in the wave i cant even tolerate my partner asking me something. Its like it takes all my energy and brain power to make myself function.

I too for some unknown reason am more calmer in the evening!!!! I dont know if it because my mind and body give up or it takes all day to finally calm down. How are you today???

I cant handlle this anymore!!!!

mtessa — Tue, 23 Sep 2014 08:08:41 GMT

Hello Chloekat84's,

CAT Team is the crisis assessment and treatment teams. They come to you if needed and review your medication….I think the mental health line can refer you. Anyway, how are you today? In my case, panic attacks again.

Take carexxx

I cant handlle this anymore!!!!

Amelbourneboy — Tue, 23 Sep 2014 08:44:17 GMT

Hi Mtessa,

what are your panic attacks related too if you dont mind me asking? Do you have any personal tips to work through them? Ive have tried almost every "tip" out there. Some work for a few mintues others do nothing.

I cant handlle this anymore!!!!

Chloekat84 — Tue, 23 Sep 2014 09:17:43 GMT

Yes changing drugs is hard to go through physically and mentally. I saw my Doc today and he has told me to stop the high dosage of the drug im taking which may be causing this reaction and making my anxiety worse. so ive been told to stop completely for two days than start on a low dose and slowly make the dose higher as I need it. Today has been another not soo good day but like others I get through it by being around people constantly to keep me company etc because I don't want to be alone. I good friend stayed over last night so I wouldn't be alone and she will again tonight which im thankful for. I feel a little bit more at peace now its the evening and my daughter is in bed. That's it for now. Take care x

I cant handlle this anymore!!!!

Chloekat84 — Tue, 23 Sep 2014 09:28:46 GMT

Hello Amelbourneboy how r u? Today has been another bad day but as the day went on I very slowly started to feel a little better and now its evening and my daughter is in bed I can relax and have a shower and get into bed and watch telly b4 bed. I think its it is the exhaustion of anxiety on the body all day that it just lets go by the evening I duno I just know that once ive had a restful sleep and I wake up early in the morning its like ive been recharged and ready for more anxiety and depression to take over and that's wats hard is trying to stop it from starting but it does uncontrollably b4 ive even gotten out of bed 😞 really hoping these days change soon as my medication has been ceased for a few days as the dosae was too high obviously for my body to handle. So after a few days I can gradually start on a low dose and increase slowly. Anyways that's it for now so the end of the day is here thank god and im going to have a shower then rela in bed watching telly for a bit. hope u have a good night too. Take care x

I cant handlle this anymore!!!!

Amelbourneboy — Tue, 23 Sep 2014 10:38:43 GMT

hey chloe,

Reading your last post almost brought tears to my eyes. It was like reading my own words!! I start my day off with raging anxiety, the shakes, that sick feeling, mind racing than as the day goes it leave. Tonight has been my first night in 6 that I have eaten dinner. Today has been so hard, at times the waves have been huge and long. I have tried to re-think the situations I know are causing it. It works for a few minutes but than its like a new voice pops (not that I hear voices) in and im back to the start.

I have just also had a nice and shower and climbed into bed, looking forward to signing onto this forum. I really do think its helps just type and talk and know there are so many others who are in the same way.

I have been lucky with the medication side of things, only had some slight start up effects but that was it. My biggest problem is forgetting to take them or thinking I don't need them... 2 days later dizzy, and I start getting waves again.

I hope you are nice and relaxed watching tv 🙂

I cant handlle this anymore!!!!

Chloekat84 — Wed, 24 Sep 2014 06:07:59 GMT

Hello Amelbourneboy. I did have a relaxing evening watching a show I've been addicted to lately "the X factor". Completely disagreed with who they sent home though. Had a restful nights sleep but it was the anxiety that woke me up at 6.30 this morning and my daughter wasn't even awake yet. So didn't start the day well. I'm halfway through the day so just need it get through the rest if it. Feeling very nervous about my daughter being home with me tomorrow and how I'll cope as I can barely look after myself atm. Wish me luck so that I can get through 2moro. Take care x

I cant handlle this anymore!!!!

Amelbourneboy — Wed, 24 Sep 2014 06:20:36 GMT

Hi Chloe,

Totally agree with you on the xfactor situation!!! I think it might all be a little staged anyway.

My day is pretty much on par with yours. Woke up, 3 seconds later the wave hit. I find when im at work i can distract my self more easier. Tomorrow Im home, all day, by myself. I plan on going for a walk at some point, just to get out of the house. If i dont all i will want to do is hide in a dark room and sleep. Try not to be too nervous about tomorrow because if you feel your not coping well, put a movie on for your daughter and hope online here, we are always here for support and too just listen. Dont put so much pressue on your self for an expectation to be a certain way. I have no doubt your an amazing mother, and your daughter will see the strength you have 🙂

I cant handlle this anymore!!!!

mtessa — Wed, 24 Sep 2014 07:53:04 GMT

Hello,

I am having a panic attack at the moment. I have tried pretty much everything. Breathing techniques, etc… I think I just let it go (dixit Frozen-lol) and I tried to focus on my kids and not to think about the symptoms because it drives me nuts like now.

Hope you are feeling quite okxxx

I cant handlle this anymore!!!!

Amelbourneboy — Wed, 24 Sep 2014 08:16:56 GMT

Hi Mtessa,

I know how hard it is, the more you try to not focas the more intentse it fills. Just try focas on the fact you can and will ride through it.

Are your panic attacks caused my anything in particular?