topic Not good enough in Anxiety

Not good enough

misties — Thu, 02 Dec 2021 07:11:09 GMT

I am having issues with low self esteem, as I get older I am 69. I am concerned that my husband will no longer find me attractive.

He tells me I am gorgeous and beautiful holds my hand we have sex about once a month but he has pics of naked beautiful girls should i be worried that I am not as good as them?

Not good enough

quirkywords — Thu, 02 Dec 2021 08:34:51 GMT

Misties

welcome to the forum.

I am in my 60s too. It is hard when the media is full of images of young beautiful women to sometimes feel good about how we look as we age.

Are the photos of the young s9men in a book or on the computer..?

Your husband loves you and finds you attractive. I think the more we like our aging bodies the more self esteem we have. I feel proud of my body and what is has achieved over the years.
i understand the pressure you feel.

Not good enough

misties — Thu, 02 Dec 2021 09:20:46 GMT

They are on his computer but I have access and know about them. It's something I accept as he has looked at porn ever since we met 20 years ago

Not good enough

quirkywords — Thu, 02 Dec 2021 10:51:39 GMT

He sounds like a loving mind. He thinks you are gorgeous can you think that too.

Not good enough

misties — Thu, 02 Dec 2021 13:24:23 GMT

It's just sometimes I wonder if he was wishing I looked like them

Not good enough

geoff — Thu, 02 Dec 2021 14:22:40 GMT

Hello Misties, and a warm welcome to the forums.

If he's been doing this for 20 years then I wouldn't worry too much, I think we all say to others and definitely to ourselves that that person is good looking, it's in our human nature and as he's not hiding it and you can have access to his computer, then he has nothing to hide.

There could be a chance he looks at them and appreciate that he has you and can say you are gorgeous as well as beautiful and remember he can't touch any of these people on the computer, but he can touch you, that's lovely.

Geoff.

Not good enough

misties — Thu, 02 Dec 2021 22:34:17 GMT

Thanks Geoff, I know I am being irrational, but is he thinking of them when he is WITH me...

Not good enough

Ggrand — Thu, 02 Dec 2021 22:54:59 GMT

Hello Dear misties,

I think it’s beautiful that your husband keeps saying to you that you are gorgeous and beautiful and holds your hand....He sounds like a very loving and caring person....

I think a lot of men look at women on the Internet...that doesn’t mean that he doesn’t love you...As our lovely Geoff has said if he’s been doing it for over 20 years, I don’t think theirs anything to worry about...

Please believe in your husband’s words about how beautiful and gorgeous you really are..both inside and outside...

My kindest thoughts lovely misties...

Grandy..

Not good enough

misties — Fri, 03 Dec 2021 08:23:22 GMT

thank you so much I feel so much better with all the comments here.

Not good enough

geoff — Fri, 03 Dec 2021 13:58:14 GMT

Hello Mistie, I agree with Grandy I don't think you have anything to worry about.

When someone is with another person it's not physically easy to think of someone he's viewed on the net because of your presence that dominates.

Remember having a person next to you is better than trying to believe it's another person, especially on the net, who may not be authenticated, as much can be done on the computer.

Geoff.