topic Re: Eco anxiety in Perth in Anxiety

Eco anxiety in Perth

Bookgirl — Mon, 19 Feb 2024 05:21:01 GMT

Hi, we are in the middle of a horrible heatwave here and its causing me a lot of anxiety thinking about the future and generally just stressing out about it all. Just seems so insurmountable and i feel overwhelmed. My 15 year old son gets angry at me for being pessimistic but its hard to be optimistic when its over 40 degrees for a long time. I just feel like i am sinking right now.

Re: Eco anxiety in Perth

Croix — Wed, 21 Feb 2024 12:59:37 GMT

Dear Bookgirl~

Welcome back. I hope your son is now doing better.

I guess in relation to how you feel at the moment htere are a couple of things you might consider. The first is of course I personally could not think clearly in 40+ heat, in fact I"d not be capable of doing much at all. If you are managing your daily tasks then you are doing pretty well.

I remeber that there have been times in the past where world events and the condition of the world have troubled you greatly, and maybe the heat is having the effect of strengthening those doubts.

I steer clear of the news, I get to know enough to be aware of what is going to affect me and my family locally but try hard not to take in more. I believe to be told day after day of all the horrible things in the world I can do nothing about simply created ever-increasing stress. It is not good for me.

So I concentrate on the sphere of events around me and in htat I probably can make some sort of difference, and when I do I end up feeling better about myself and things in general.

The media will deliberately feed your sense of worry and emphasize all hte bad and sensational, not the good, that's how they get ratings and advertising dollars as a result. Please don't play their game.

Croix

Re: Eco anxiety in Perth

Bookgirl — Fri, 23 Feb 2024 04:02:16 GMT

Thanks, my son tells me that i have though the world was ending on numerous occasions over the last 6 years and i should be heartened by the fact it hasn't. My psych thinks i have OCD and is going to help me with that. I have managed to stop looking at the news so much. Again this is a compulsion i am dealing with. Mental health is so much fun isn't it? I recognise what i am doing but it is so ingrained it is hard to stop. This week i have had a lot of stress with work and family members being sick and i am the main carer so i think my brain just overloaded a bit. Appreciate the support.

Re: Eco anxiety in Perth

therising — Fri, 23 Feb 2024 19:22:39 GMT

Hi Bookgirl

I admire you, trying so hard to manage the heat there. I'm not sure I could do it. As a gal who kinda changes into some highly emotional feral animal in unbearably hot whether, I can relate to how the heat can change people's nature.

Burning up in hot weather is one experience, burning out (due to a lot of stressors) is another. Combine the 2 and it can definitely become overwhelming. I've found that having people around to help me manage can make some difference. While it's your 15yo son who helps you manage to some degree, by the sound of it, it tends to be my 21yo daughter who leads me to become more conscious of how I'm feeling. Because she's a feeler too, she has been known to say to me 'You have got to calm down. I can feel what you're doing to me'. If we've got a kid who's a bit of an empath (able to feel other people's emotions), it can be come a challenge for them in a number of ways. I think it also helps if we've got people around us who like to wonder. Saying to wonderful people 'I need you to wonder what would make a difference to me' and then having them wonder, can mean finding the fast track toward what can make a difference. Wondering alone, about why we're feeling the way we are and what can make a difference to us, can become a highly frustrating, confusing and even depressing experience at times.

I find what Croix mentions to be completely relatable, managing differently in the heat while managing what triggers me, such as the news. In summer I tend to research the weather ahead of time. The days that I can see are going to be the hottest, I'll pick those days as being the days where I won't do all that much if I can manage it. My number one goal becomes about managing to stay as cool as possible. And as far as the news goes, I won't indulge in it unless I have to. With the news largely being about things we can't do anything about, I can't see the point in observing nothing but sufferance or enraging content. I think COVID helped me make up my mind on that one. The constant reporting on the death toll just became too depressing and upsetting, as I felt so much for the families who lost loved ones.

So hard, hey, when we're a real feeler and can feel so much of what impacts us.

Re: Eco anxiety in Perth

Bookgirl — Mon, 04 Mar 2024 03:52:11 GMT

Yes, my son just knows when i am down. I admit i am in a rough patch right now and feeling really down. My family get frustrated with me about me being so catastrophic and i wish i could think differently but i think at the moment i am really stuck in a destructive cycle due to climate change and hearing all the bad news constantly about it. I worry about my son's future all the time. I worry about how i can't save him from the worst of the world. I hate myself for not being present in his life. He told me once he wishes he didn't have a mum who was miserable all the time. I want to cry sometimes because my mum did the same to me but even going to a pscyh sometimes i just get overwhelmed and i hate myself for it.

Re: Eco anxiety in Perth

Croix — Wed, 06 Mar 2024 11:45:03 GMT

Dear Bookgirl~

As you know I tend to avoid the news and stick to my own little sphere around me. Sadly that does not stop me thinking of all the catastrophic things that can go wrong, and acting as if they are about to do so.

One thing I find is a great help is there is someone whose judgement I trust, my partner. So if agonize over having passed a speed camera for instance and think of all the possible consequences, my partner simply reminds me "the cautious way you drive you never going to exceed the peed limit and be booked" -which when I think about it is true.

That's one of the advantages of not being reminded of the big global picture -good or bad. My thoughts are concentrated on smaller things where I can be reassured.

Are you lucky enough to have someone you are comfortable taking notice of and believing?

Croix

Re: Eco anxiety in Perth

blondguy — Wed, 06 Mar 2024 14:34:50 GMT

Hello Bookgirl...Its always great to see you on the forums.

Croix and therising are spot on with how we can benefit by avoiding the news especially where climate change hysteria is concerned.

You are and have always been a strong person Bookgirl!

The news nowadays can be problematic as it can interfere with our well being. Our climate has always been cyclical. I understand your situation as Melbourne has 39C forecast this Saturday. My thought processes will be very limited during and afterwards.

you are not alone feeling anxiety and having that awful sinking feeling

my kindest always

Paul

Re: Eco anxiety in Perth

gloria10 — Sun, 10 Mar 2024 10:15:24 GMT

I completely get it! Going through a heatwave too (reaching 41 here).

It's very stressful and attributes to low mood too.

How long till yours is over?

Re: Eco anxiety in Perth

Bookgirl — Fri, 22 Mar 2024 00:40:12 GMT

I think what makes it worse is that everyone feels a bit down about this and then things feel hopeless. It feels like there is nothing we can do and it will get worse and worse. Then i worry about how i will cope and then i don't want to be here for it. Then i feel like a loser for not coping and terrible for not supporting my son through it. Its a vicious cycle.

Re: Eco anxiety in Perth

therising — Fri, 22 Mar 2024 07:44:29 GMT

Hi Bookgirl

Finding ways to manage skill development at a snails pace can become really challenging at times, for sure. Kinda like 'It took me 2 years to learn that, 10 years to learn this, 3 months to reach that conclusion, a lifetime to finally reach this or that understanding' etc etc. Would be so much easier if we were taught a lot of life skills in school, for an hour each school day. Imagine if one unit was used to learn how to breathe your way through stress, while regulating your nervous system. Imagine a unit where you were taught how to develop and listen to your inner sage (a wise and calming aspect) or your inner adventurer (an aspect full of joy and excitement). Just imagine 13 years of learning all the kind of stuff that'd make a difference in life. Instead, we come out the other end of those 13 years struggling to cope with life.

I've found one of the greatest benefits to having kids is it's forced me to have to develop skills. I imagine you'd agree, there's no choice but to develop skills in patience, problem solving, tolerance, open mindedness and so on. If we don't develop those skills specifically for our self, we do develop them for the sake of our child or children. How to see and feel the world differently is definitely a skill and one I'm still trying to master. Some days I don't do a very good job at it and can be easily triggered, yet other days I can really surprise myself. I think our kids have a lot to teach us. While my son teaches me to not take too much too seriously (he's a bit of a comedian with an incredible imagination and can therefor lead me to imagine the humorous or insane side of some challenges), my daughter is the one who's inclined to stop me in my tracks when things get too stressful or depressing for me. One of her typical ways involves her standing in front of me, putting her hands on my shoulders and saying 'STOP! Just breathe. I SAID BREATHE! Long slow deep breathes. You need to calm down'. She won't let me go 'til I start regulating my breathing. I've learned a lot from my 2 brilliant teachers over the years. I think sometimes we forget how to live and our kids can remind us in certain ways. At times, a bit of brainstorming as a group goes a long way. At 53, I'm still learning how to live, as are my kids. It's easier to work it out together at times.

Perhaps, in these times, we're in need of a revolution of some type. While the French are passionate protestors and revolutionaries, dating all the way back to the days of the French revolution (where the average person suffered terribly through poverty, depression and injustice while leaders lived in an offensive amount of luxury), we Australians are a little more complacent while simply hoping for change for the better. It's passion and intolerance that drives change and sometimes fury that keeps the passion burning. Give me a great leader to lead the way, give me a great cause to inspire passion and rebellion and I'll be there. I think we need a great leaders who provide a sense of hope and passion and vision of change for the better, in this world. Give me leaders who don't spout 'inspiring' messages that actually translate to hatred, fear, segregation/discrimination, resentment and more. Bookgirl, we definitely require good leaders in the way of the kind of changes we need to begin feeling in this world. Leaders who helps create great vision and passion are ones who generate great optimism amongst all of the people, not just select groups.

Re: Eco anxiety in Perth

Bookgirl — Fri, 22 Mar 2024 11:31:01 GMT

My son definitely helps calm me down. Feel on a bit of a spiral at the moment. Keep looking at weather and even though it's not hot I worry it's still not normal. I agonise over the weather report whreras last year I couldn't have told you what the average temp was and never looked at the bom. Now I can tell you it updates at 4.20pm every day. My pysch tells me to resist the compulsion to look but then I worry about what I don't know which is a vicious circle. I just wish I could cope better. It just is totally overwhelming some days and I don't want to get out of bed. My son told me once he wished he didn't have a mum who was sad all the time and it broke my heart.

Re: Eco anxiety in Perth

Croix — Sun, 24 Mar 2024 11:47:02 GMT

Dear Bookgirl~

Yes the need to look at the BOM and weather reports can indeed seem too hard to resist, and as you say it becomes a spiral. Simply telling you not to look is not enough. As with many addictions (yes I realise it is OCD) help of another person is needed right at the time the need is overwhelming.

Do you think your son, even though a trifle young can understand your predicament and be one you can call on when needed. It may be preferable to have an hand in mum not being "sad all the time"

Also are there others? Ideally a network with someone always to hand and maybe a list of tasks or activities you can do right then to distract you.

I would think that simply relying upon your own powers not to look is expecting too much, and sets you up for failure , leading to feeling bad about yourself.

Croix

Re: Eco anxiety in Perth

Bookgirl — Sat, 23 Mar 2024 07:49:31 GMT

My pysch says try to resist the compulsion even for 5 minutes and build up that way. Most days I am ok with this. It's just one comment on the weather will send me spiralling. I think if temp goes down I will be happy but it has and I an still not happy as I think it should be lower. My family get frustrated with me. I understand that because I am in this cycle where I get over one thing and cycle on to the next thing to worry about. It's why anxiety is so exhausting for everyone. We usually go away for Easter and every year I have had severe anxiety over some worry that didn't eventuate. I am trying to look back on that and calm myself down. I think when I have less to do it gets worse so sometimes holidays don't help. Not sure if other anxiety sufferers have this issue.

Re: Eco anxiety in Perth

Croix — Sat, 23 Mar 2024 12:28:02 GMT

Dear Bookgirl~

I can see what your psych is getting at, perhaps it might be a good way, I guess each has a different technique that might help.

I also find it as if the mind has a built-in capacity for a certain level of worry, and if one matter is no longer relevant then the mind wil devote the same amout of worry to something else. For me distraction, be it another person or some activity (preferably involving some physical movement) helps.

I can see why your family might gets frustrated when you are still worrying, but it has moved on to something else. I would imagine holidays coming up are themselves sources of worry. I hope in time you get to realise the things you were anxious about never happen during them.

Certainly for me not keeping the the mind busy with some task will leave it open for more worry

Croix

Re: Eco anxiety in Perth

blondguy — Sat, 23 Mar 2024 12:45:47 GMT

Hi Bookgirl! ...You and I cant really do much about a climate shift that has been occurring on and off for many thousands (millions) of years. I do understand your concerns on this BG yet its just my very humble opinion that its only a normal climate shift.

Just for your information, in the 1970's the scientists/experts were warning the public about another 'Ice Age'

I admire your strength and ability to speak from the heart as well as you do BG

my kindest always

Paul

Re: Eco anxiety in Perth

Bookgirl — Mon, 25 Mar 2024 00:56:16 GMT

It seems really hot still for this time of year in Perth and it freaks me out. I am not doing well at all. There is a lot going on in my life with new job, husband's job contract needs extending, my son's mental health, my elderly mother's health too. I feel overwhelmed and sometimes i feel like i just can't keep going. The weather seems to be the hardest to cope with. I just feel like its all too much. Had trouble getting out of bed on the weekend again. I just feel like i cant' deal with the climate change as its so insurmountable and it will lead to society breakdown etc etc.

Re: Eco anxiety in Perth

Bookgirl — Thu, 28 Mar 2024 01:16:44 GMT

Am feeling really down. Have to take my mum back to specialist today as her blood results apparently not good. Can't get others in my family to help which puts pressure on me at work. My husband is on a contract for work and that expires in May and I am terrified he will lose his job. Weather still seems really warm. Can't read the news or the weather now. Every day its sunny i freak out. I hate this.

Re: Eco anxiety in Perth

Eagle Ray — Thu, 28 Mar 2024 05:39:53 GMT

Hi Bookgirl,

I don’t know if this will help but I’ll try to explain how I’ve come to terms with climate change. I’ve been very aware of it for sometime as I spend a huge amount of time in the natural environment and I’ve seen the changes occurring. 10 years ago now it really hit home when I saw significant impacts in areas I’d known well since a child. It was initially a shock when I grasped the changes and then there was a period of grieving and then acceptance. So instead of feeling overwhelmed now I have come to a point of accepting it is happening and it is having impacts and will continue to do so. But I also know from the huge amount of time I’ve spent in nature that there is a great deal of resilience in living systems as well. Nature will do its best to adapt. I cannot singularly solve or prevent climate change so I know fretting will not help. I’ve allowed myself to grieve instead. With acceptance I am not becoming constantly hypervigilant about it. I am just observing and aware and then do what I can in my own small ways to act in a climate-conscious manner.

We humans have been very belated in our response including a severe lack of leadership in government on the issue, but gradually that is also changing and we are being forced to adapt anyway now. I have a strong interest in the adaptations humans are implementing such as those through regenerative agriculture, and there are significant changes already underway in these areas. There is much reason for hope even if we cannot all together halt climate change. I’ve bought a copy of Charles Massey’s Call of the Reed Warbler. He is a farmer and scientist leading the way with far more ecologically and climate-sensitive agricultural methods that are also proving to be more economically sound in the long term. I find focussing on where solutions are coming from is encouraging.

So while I still have concerns they are not paralysing me. I’ve grieved some of the things already lost and those being lost as we speak. I grieve for future losses as well. But I also have hope. There are new, more climate-sensitive narratives emerging. I wonder if focussing on some of the positive initiatives that are happening would help you and maybe you could share that learning with your son which will create some hope for him too? I’ve found in so many areas of life that self-education is often the best antidote to anxiety.

I also wonder if you can find ways to connect to this moment now and just be present through your senses with what is around you? Perhaps some time in nature? Not projecting into the future but just feeling this moment. When we can connect with nature and our fellow humans in this moment then better future moments tend to unfold. So instead of worrying about the future we create a better future by being connected with this moment now, if that makes sense? It means you are likely to be more present with loved ones too such as with your mum with her health issues. Sometimes it just helps to take things one thing at a time.

Take care,

Re: Eco anxiety in Perth

Bookgirl — Fri, 29 Mar 2024 04:35:37 GMT

Thank you for this. It does help. My oh so wise son who is 15 tells me the same thing. I think i am in the grieving stage and its just that i hate change. I think that comes from my up bringing and so anything that suggest big time change just sends me into a spiral. This kind of change is huge and scares me and i think most people but as you and my son say, nature adapts.

I am definitely trying to take it one day at a time and not ruin easter (my son says i ruin all the holidays with my worry). Its a beautiful day here and even though i am worried about rain, i am ok. Also my mum got good news today about her specialist results so i am relieved about that. Just trying to take one day at a time and thank you for writing that because it did really help me today.

Re: Eco anxiety in Perth

Eagle Ray — Sat, 30 Mar 2024 02:56:55 GMT

Dear Bookgirl,

You are welcome and I do understand the feelings of overwhelm. 10 years ago when the reality of climate change really hit home and my system kind of freaked out, a friend of mine said, yes it’s an issue but if you become overwhelmed by it you won’t live and enjoy your life. He had the same concerns but also was still living and enjoying his life. So I’ve kind of learned to acknowledge the reality and feel the sadness about the impacts but also continue with life and look towards hopeful initiatives as well. If anything, climate change has been a great instigator of change in many sectors - agriculture, technology, business etc. And finally after overlooking Indigenous fire management knowledge for decades authorities are finally listening to and implementing Indigenous fire practices that are far more sophisticated and ecologically sensitive than the ones employed previously. There is a huge amount of wisdom in the cool burns that have been used for millennia to sensitively manage country in relation to the seasons, plant flowering times, movement of animal species etc.

I’m in WA too and I’m also very aware of the lack of rain and the persistence of dry weather well into autumn. I think the reality is ecological systems will, and already are, making adaptations. Some losses will be inevitable while systems struggle to adapt. I can see the impacts in bushland across the road from me where the plants with the softest foliage are suffering the most. A bit like a human body under duress from an illness, ecological systems are already shifting and changing in various ways so that life continues even if there is some significant change within the system. So I guess I’ve accepted and processed that reality now, whereas before it used to feel kind of paralysing. I now try to think of ways I can be part of the solution and take an interest in the many positive things many people are doing across multiple sectors to change things for the better in the future. There are regenerative agriculture initiatives across this region with numerous conferences and meetings being held, carbon neutral and even carbon negative companies, renewable energy projects etc. It’s actually exciting to see the people who care and are really making a difference.

So I hope maybe you can see some of those positive changes and feel better for it. I’m really glad too your mum’s specialist results were good. I hope you can have a restful and lovely Easter break with your family.

All the best,