topic Declined a job offer and now I feel like a time waster in Anxiety

Declined a job offer and now I feel like a time waster

mcshmurt — Tue, 12 Apr 2022 11:38:05 GMT

Hello! I'm not sure if I should be posting this here or in another category.

Today I declined a job offer as the salary was below what I was willing to accept as a minimum offer. I was very polite about it and explained my reasoning and thanked them for the opportunity to apply.

While the hiring manager was also polite I did feel like absolute crap when he said that it would have been helpful for him to know that I wasn't as flexible with my salary expectations as I'd expressed in the interview. While it doesn't seem like it should be a big deal, I do agree with him that I should have been more honest. I am already feeling really upset at myself about it because I feel as though I came across to him as a time waster and not actually serious about the job.

I think my problem was that in the initial interview when I gave my salary expectations I knew what I was seeking but I was trying to be a people-pleaser and giving a lower range in the hopes I'd be hired, but then he offered even lower than that.

I know I shouldn't be beating myself up about this because I hadn't even received the formal offer yet and I know there were plenty of other candidates to select from, but I just can't help but take those words he said to heart and feel like a dishonest time waster. I feel an overwhelming urge to call him up and apologise over and over again and express how great an opportunity the job is. But then, that's the people-pleaser coming out of me again.

Please, if anyone could provide their perspective and/or tips on how to handle this I'd be so grateful!

Thank you 🙂

Declined a job offer and now I feel like a time waster

blondguy — Tue, 12 Apr 2022 13:03:42 GMT

Hello mcshmurt

You have conducted yourself very well in this interview and good on you! I have been in corporate for a few decades in senior management.... I wish I had your confidence in my early interviews!

I was like yourself and being a people pleaser and accepted either the same or a lower salary. Unfortunately your hiring manager has made a mistake when he mentioned 'it would have been helpful for him to know that I wasn't as flexible with my salary expectations'......This is woeful coming from anyone in HR

Its only my humble opinion......You have nothing to apologize for. Your hiring manager has a budget which is his responsibility ...not yours

HR could have provided even a small incentive which they have failed to do

any questions are always welcome...the forums are a safe and non judgmental place for you (and me) to post

Paul

Declined a job offer and now I feel like a time waster

geoff — Tue, 12 Apr 2022 14:26:35 GMT

Hello Mcshmurt, don't be too hard on yourself and what Paul has said I agree with.

It's standard for the job interviewer when hiring somebody to offer a lower salary, just to save the company some money, it's always done and then you negotiate on an accepted salary.

Best wishes.

Geoff.

Declined a job offer and now I feel like a time waster

jaz28 — Wed, 13 Apr 2022 10:23:25 GMT

Hi there,

You are not in the wrong! Not to burn bridges but .... you can probably do better so I would not worry about it. Easier said than done, but I totally agree with Paul.

Jaz xx