topic Face book - Would you post in Anxiety

Face book - Would you post

Spud48 — Thu, 24 Jan 2019 10:14:05 GMT

Hi,

I am new to this forum, I have had Anxiety of on for long time.

I never tell anyone that I have it as I feel week, Sometimes I think I would better off just letting the all of the

people I know that i have it would somehow relieve the Stress . I would like to here other suffers thoughts on this issue?

Also FB is very confusing for me sometimes and becomes a negative as i think everyone else has a great life and mine in shite.(I know this s not the case but its just the way i feel. Again what do others think of FB and is it worth it??

Spud

Face book - Would you post

snapesnape78 — Thu, 24 Jan 2019 10:49:52 GMT

Hi Spud!

I find that talking about your anxiety with someone can be helpful.

It can be hit and miss with reaching out on social media but if you feel it will help go for it.

I like using facebook and insta but it can have an effect on my wellbeing when i am having a bad day and compare myself to others. On those days i just limit my usage 🙂

Face book - Would you post

smallwolf — Thu, 24 Jan 2019 11:25:38 GMT

Hello Spud,

Personally I would not put a post onto FB saying something along the lines that I have these mental health problems. Of course we are all different some people might think it OK. It is an individual choice. I also don't know how all my "friends" on FB would react. That said, there have been times when I wished I could. But that I do not the level of courage needed for that.

Now, as only seeing positive images on FB that is a definite. Our friends show us where they have been, and we might start to compare. What they do not show us are the crappy things that might happen in their lives. So it is not really balanced view of life.

Somewhere like here is where I can be a true self. Admittedly you cannot see pictures, but I can talk here about things that frustrate me, or annoy me, or my problems and feel confident that I won't be judged by other members of the community. There are other threads on the forums about FB which you can find using the search function at the top of the page.

And regarding your anxiety, that is something I am very familiar with. And if you want to chat about that or anything else, let me know.

Tim

Face book - Would you post

anewhope — Thu, 24 Jan 2019 21:19:51 GMT

Hey Spud,

Sorry to hear that you are having a tough time at the moment. Anxiety is never easy at all.

While it might feel like its easier to let everyone know about the issue,

How I always say is, finding the right 1 person to tell is much more useful than telling 100.

Facebook can be a very confusing thing, it gives us the ability to show little or show lots of our life to friends / acquantances and more. The hard part about it is that the internet can be one of those outlets that doesn't allow us to move on from it eventually, I find sometimes things are known to everyone which may be hard to sometimes move on from once you are feeling better. It may be a conversation piece for people to bring up as you meet them (say if you meet a facebook friend after 5-10 years they are likely to possibly bring it up).

I know how you feel when you see posts online about people having a "great life". What glorifies Facebook is that people will only show the good things that are happening. I am sure there is lots of anxiety and stress in each persons life in one way or another but often its best its refrained from a public (group of friends and future friends) space.

Its not that you might not necessarily share them like others do (we are all different), but you may find that not using facebook for a while may allow you to build on your own great and awesome moments in life without friends showing it on your screen constantly.

With regards to Anxiety in your life, is there anything in particular from your anxiety that if there was a way to manage it and get a better understanding that you would be able to find you had more happy moments and experiences in life? Do you have any really close friends that you trust to talk directly to that may know you well too?

Face book - Would you post

Emlm — Thu, 24 Jan 2019 22:17:36 GMT

Hey spud

have you seen a doctor about your anxiety? I suffer from anxiety and depression and I keep it private. Only those closest to me no.

I have seen amazing posts on Facebook before from people who have talked about their mental health problems and how they sort help ect. It really made me feel like I wasn’t alone but I couldn’t do the same thing, once I did post something about my depression but I soon deleted it. I don’t have the confidence. But I admire those who do.

Face book - Would you post

Spud48 — Sun, 27 Jan 2019 05:54:10 GMT

Thank - yes I do the same on FB - Just dont go on! I think i will just keep the whole thing to myself

get back into my exercise and keep up may affirmations!

Face book - Would you post

Spud48 — Sun, 27 Jan 2019 05:57:28 GMT

Hi Tim,

Thanks for the advice - You are right about FB. I will will just leave it alone

for a while i think, And thanks for the offer of a chat - I appreciate it!

Face book - Would you post

Spud48 — Sun, 27 Jan 2019 06:10:46 GMT

Hi anewhope,

My wife is my best friend and I do talk to her about it, I have mates but I don't want

to burden them with my Issues, I have told one through text messages. He has had some PTSD issues

so he does get i think. But again I don't want him to worry about me he has his own life to deal with.

I have dealt with the anxiety for a long time and Exercise is the Key. I have had an Injury that has stopped me from exercising for a while(just getting old) But went back to boot camp last week and just have to do what i can. I said to my wife that day i felt better and I have to push myself to go! And I just have to get out and grab joyful moments. There are plenty out there to be had!

Spud

Face book - Would you post

Soberlicious96 — Sun, 27 Jan 2019 09:29:48 GMT

Hi Spud,

I suppose you've probably heard the saying: "A problem shared is a problem halved" yeah? Then perhaps you already know, at least on an intellectual level, that if you tell someone else about your anxiety, then it may well lose its power over you. And in a way, you already have! You've told us on here!

If it helps to know, I have always found writing things down (or, these days, tapping it out on a keyboard) to be especially helpful in giving me the courage to then go and discuss it with someone else. Perhaps now that you have 'told' us here ion Beyond Blue, you could perhaps at least think about telling someone face to face? Little hint: the more we open up to others, the more they open up to us. You are probably much less alone with this than you think.

As for Facebook, yes, I too feel that it is certainly not the greatest place for self-esteem building.

I used to constantly compare my insides to everybody else's outsides, and always came off second best. Over time I came to realise that it was a grossly unfair comparison. And the reason I realised? Well, quite simply because I realised that there were days when I faked a smile on the outside, but felt like crap on the inside ..... and I thought 'If I can fake happiness, then surely other people have done the same thing at some point?'

You know how you see a duck on a pond, and it looks like it's just gliding along so graciously? But underneath the water, it's legs are going flat out, full steam ahead! ...... sometimes, I talk about my 'legs under the water' and other times I talk about the glide along the surface. For a long time, my life was both ..... but I just didn't acknowledge the 'under the surface' stuff before. And now I do.

And guess what? I am okay with being me now. Anxious some days, gliding on other days.

Anyway, just be true to you, warts and all. After all, no one else is qualified!

Hope that helps a little. xo

Face book - Would you post

blondguy — Sun, 27 Jan 2019 10:13:13 GMT

Hi Spud

I used to be on FB years ago when it started and was okay.....Just for me I find a website like FB sleazy when we have to provide them with all our personal details

Directors and CEO's of FB dont have a Facebook page...which is strange

All of that aside...Its not moderated in any way which is hard work when I have depression and left over anxiety

Just for me....it wont be happening.

Here is the Facebook thread that I wrote a while ago with many members thoughts. Its a copy & paste link Spud so you have to put it into your browser

www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/online-forums/staying-well/facebook-the-good-or-the-bad-your-say

Thank-you for being a part of the forum family Spud48 🙂

I really hope you can stick around and be a part of the forum family!

Paul

Face book - Would you post

Spud48 — Mon, 28 Jan 2019 01:46:38 GMT

hi Soberlicious96,

Thanks for your message, it was very helpful.

I like the duck story cause thats exactly how i feel sometimes.

And I do affirmations when i arrive at work each day which helps a lot. I will start doing before i go to bead

also as great to go to sleep with positive thoughts. And Im glad Im me warts and all. LOL

Spud

Face book - Would you post

Spud48 — Mon, 28 Jan 2019 01:56:00 GMT

Hi Paul,

I shut it down for 3 months but missed the classifieds, So started again and had no friends for months.(im like the dude of the castle)

Then started the friend thing again but have been selective as to who I accept or ask to be friends with. We live in the North of QLD so its a great way for my wife and my families to keep in touch and see what we are up to.

Its a hard one and its addictive in a way. I just have to show constraint and not look at it daily!

Ill check out your post - And thanks for welcoming me to the Family Forum. I will be hanging around

as i am already finding it very helpful!

Spud

Face book - Would you post

quirkywords — Mon, 28 Jan 2019 05:03:03 GMT

Spud48,

I have just seen your thread.

I am in the older age group that didn't grow up with a computer and for me Face Book is great for keeping in touch with my family and extended family. I don't post personal posts mainly the odd quote or photograph of some family member visiting me.

I have a page for my shop.

I know it can be stressful for people so I feel lucky it helps me keep in touch. Maybe it is my age that helps.

Quirky

Face book - Would you post

Doolhof — Mon, 28 Jan 2019 05:44:22 GMT

Hi Spud,

I've been glancing through this thread. It sounds like yo are trying to do things that help you through each day, like your exercise and positive thoughts and mediations.

For me, it depends how I am feeling as to how I interact with Facebook. I do like to see people's photos, especially of their children or their pets. It can make me feel left out, jealous or unworthy at times, but that is HOW I INTERPRET WHAT I AM LOOKING AT!

If I am having a lousy day, stuff will trigger me. Other days I feel happy for others and what they are doing and achieving. I don't tend to share much about myself on Facebook.

This forum though is different, this is a safe place to share how you are feeling and let people know what you are not coping with.

We can also share what is helping and know that people understand and won't think yo are trying to be better than them.

Hopefully you and all people using the forums will not feel like they have to compare themselves to others.

Cheers to you from Dools

Face book - Would you post

Guest_093 — Mon, 28 Jan 2019 08:27:56 GMT

Just had to give my input on this, my thoughts on the 'facebook' matter is that you really have to watch what you say on it as it can be taken seriously out of context by people that know you as it is it is a public social page. I have been spoken to by my boss about what I have posted there as in 'just watch the posts you put on f/b' as in likes and posts, so it is a good thing to limit yourself and stay in control with what you are reading good and bad and time wise. I myself have fallen into the what I call the f/b trap and have limited myself to only once per day and to only the happy groups that I choose on that day whereas beyond blue group have been nothing but honest, caring and supporting in everything that I have written in the time that I have been involved here I believe more in beyond blue that any other group that I have ever been involved with over the many years that I have traveled the long hard road and still walking lol. All the best Spitfire1

Face book - Would you post

Spud48 — Mon, 28 Jan 2019 08:54:18 GMT

Thanks Spitfire - Yes I have limit myself more.

Great that your getting support from this forum. It seems very positive and helpful.

Spud

Face book - Would you post

Doolhof — Tue, 29 Jan 2019 05:34:30 GMT

Hi Spud, Spitfire and All,

I'm not really sure ow I feel about employers having access to what you post and react to on Facebook. I suppose if you are very careful how you interact on Facebook you won't have any issues.

I tend to just have a look and maybe like people's photos of family or their pets.

Sometimes I will read a longer section of interaction between various people. It can become very heated at times! Some people don't seem to care what they write!

This forum is completely different. Yes, there are times when people might upset each other, but generally this is an environment where people try to help, support, validate and acknowledge each other.

Hopefully it is a place where everyone feels welcome and safe.

Cheers all from Dools

Face book - Would you post

Spud48 — Tue, 29 Jan 2019 07:18:38 GMT

HI Dools,

I am the employer LOL and I agree with you,

I spend more time at work and with the staff then I do with my family. I dont need to see

what they do on the weekends and vica versa.

Spud!

Face book - Would you post

Guest_093 — Fri, 22 Feb 2019 11:55:54 GMT

hi y'all just a further post on this subject that i would like to add! I originally joined f/b to chat to my nephew and niece who live in Brisbane to which i did, now 2 years later have got myself involved in social media i believe in the wrong way, getting caught up in other people posts & not liking what I read or see, gone from my original plan of just befriending and being in contact with my family, it is so easy for me anyway to get hooked up in social posts and spending more and more time on f/b than anywhere else, gone is my belief so i have control of it once again for me and have unfriended who i have had to to the point that I think they only friended me to use me to get what they want so no more now!!! The following issue is nothing to do with f/b but she was a f/b friend. This workmate involved me in another issue that happened @ another store @ my current store & spent the afternoon raving on about the issue and basically did nothing for the time her/I on shift i did tell her when i had had enough to 'shut up' a few more words were spoken, she went home @ 3. I did not get all my work done that afternoon, went to work next shift and 1 task she was supposed to do was not done, so spent nearly all my shift doing her work so i retaliated and wrote a very nasty note in communication book aimed @ her but worded it wrongly that the whole team are now upset with me for writing down what I thought was a point, i was so angry about the whole episode and today the boss said to me not to write down anything like that again as it upsets people but to bring it up with the person concerned I have let not talking to other work person before so much that it has gone to the mediation stage and no positive outcome so as i said earlier i did tell her to 'shut up' & do some work and few more words so then boss told me to bring the issue up with her so i wish she was there on that day and i would've and i probably would not being so upset about the whole matter. now i am getting the cold treatment from fellow workmates about the note and i was just trying to put a message across to that 1 person that basically sat on her arse for the shift and does not give a shit. so now i feel alientated by everyone @ work including the boss and feel I have done the wrong thing yet again because i felt the need to stand up for myself and now i am beating myself up over it. Spitfire1