topic Sensitivity in Anxiety

Sensitivity

Booklover17 — Mon, 24 Sep 2018 21:33:15 GMT

Hi everyone,

Has anyone else felt extremely sensitive as part of their anxiety? (Note: I am seeing a Psychologist and will mention this to her). At the moment, I feel like anything will make me cry (I am not normally like this). Does anyone have any tips/advice for calming down before crying?

Sensitivity

White_Rose — Mon, 24 Sep 2018 23:12:14 GMT

Dear Booklover

Welcome to the forum. Good to see you here.

First of all I want to say that the urge to cry when we are unwell is very normal. If you have had the 'flu perhaps you can remember how it makes you a bit weepy. Nothing to do with your normal reactions, just the 'flu bug invading and breaching your defences. Anxiety and depression also do this at times. If you look at the drop down list under Get Support you will see the Publications to Order or Download. Click on this and navigate to the various publications. You can download Fact Sheets and order booklets, all free of charge. It's always good to be as informed as possible about any illness.

Sometimes it's good to cry and let out the hurt. I know we feel a bit silly doing this, especially when we are with someone. I have noticed when someone gets a bit teary how quick they are to apologise and yet no apology is necessary. This is how you feel. I suspect we try to keep calm because others may ask questions and we are afraid to talk because it will bring more tears. When you talk to your psychologist, if you start to cry just let it go. No good psychologist will tell you to stop.

When I get a bit weepy I will say to whoever I am with, "Don't be nice to me or I will cry". Hopefully the other person will change the subject or make you laugh instead. We do get emotional when unwell.

The other reason I can think of is that your therapy is beginning to hit the mark and go places you may be upset about. When this happens we do tend to get upset more easily. If this is the case please try to work through it with your therapist. It is hard work and sometimes painful, but you will emerge the other side and that will be wonderful.

In the meantime, continue to post here if it helps. We are always here.

Mary

Sensitivity

Doolhof — Tue, 25 Sep 2018 00:21:04 GMT

Hi Booklover,

I too welcome you to the forum. I agree with Mary, crying is a natural part of life. I have read somewhere that tears are actually healing for different reasons. Maybe you could Google the benefits of crying and tears and find some answers there.

As far as trying to stop the tears, a few deep breathes might help. I do wonder if that is helpful though as we then supress what ever emotion and thoughts the tears help us to release. There are times I agree where tears may not seem appropriate.

Most psychologists and doctors have tissues on their desk! They are there for a reason! We humans do cry!

Hopefully you can find some ways to deal with your anxiety!

Cheers to you from Dools

Sensitivity

Booklover17 — Thu, 27 Sep 2018 21:15:57 GMT

Hi Mary,

Thank you very much for your reply. You could be right, it may be my treatment is working. I will take a look at the publications you suggested.

I appreciate your support.

Sensitivity

Booklover17 — Thu, 27 Sep 2018 21:17:53 GMT

Hi Dools,

Thank you very much for your reply. It is natural but hard for me to accept, especially when I start crying in public!! I have cried before with my psychologist, getting used to it!

Thank you for the support.

Sensitivity

Doolhof — Fri, 28 Sep 2018 00:41:39 GMT

Hi Booklover17,

Yes, crying in public can feel embarrassing. I would rather I had burst into tears the other day over an incident instead of becoming angry!

It feels at times that I have little control over how I behave. It can be very unpleasant at times I agree.

My Dr is very gracious and passes me the tissues when I need them!

Hope you find some answers and solutions to your anxiety issues.

Cheers from Dools

Sensitivity

Booklover17 — Mon, 01 Oct 2018 20:15:41 GMT

Hi Dools,

Thank you for your message. I feel like that too - that it is hard to control my emotions. It doesn’t help that I have a lot of other personal issues going on at the same time.

Thanks Dools. I hope you are going well.

Sensitivity

White_Rose — Mon, 01 Oct 2018 23:03:16 GMT

Hello Booklover

How are you going? You say there are other difficulties in your life which impact on your crying. That's OK. We cannot control everything in our lives which is a pity in some ways but I suppose if we had everything under control it may mean other people lose control.

I was told that to keep my emotions more manageable and yet give me time to grieve and remember, I should pick a time to do this. Sit down, with a timer if necessary, for no more than half an hour and think about what troubles you. Cry if you wish, no one is around. Make sure you get up after the half hour and do something active that needs your concentration. I find that works rather than constantly trying to put these unwanted thoughts out of your mind. If they return tell them you will see them at (time) and carry on with whatever you were doing. It does take a bit of practice but it's oh so worthwhile.

Fighting these thoughts is where we lose out. We need to befriend the thoughts by accepting they will be there but you have control over when you will pay attention. So keep calm and say no but make sure you give them houseroom on occasions. I hope that helps.

Mary

Sensitivity

Booklover17 — Thu, 04 Oct 2018 21:32:47 GMT

Hi Mary,

Thank you for your post. That’s a really good idea, making a time to grieve/ be upset. I will try it, thank you.

Sensitivity

Doolhof — Thu, 04 Oct 2018 23:09:17 GMT

Hello Booklover,

I like Mary's idea of setting a time for those negative thoughts and for grief then making a conscious effort to let go and do something different and meaningful!

I was also wondering, you have the title "Booklover" do you have any type of book that you like to read? I enjoy a range of styles depending on my moods! Other people's travel stories interest me as do some historical novels or "happy" and funny stories about animals.

Hope you are going okay!

Cheers from Dools

Sensitivity

Booklover17 — Mon, 08 Oct 2018 20:10:01 GMT

Hi Dools,

I am going ok. How are you? I read classics but also some modern fiction.

Sensitivity

White_Rose — Mon, 08 Oct 2018 22:53:31 GMT

Hello Booklover

Great to find a fellow bookworm. I used to read a great deal of fiction but find it doesn't satisfy me these days. I am a member of a book club and we usually read a book of fiction. Surprisingly I find them interesting so it must be my choice of fiction that does not work. These days I enjoy history, philosophy, spirituality, poetry and what I call anthropology. Buying books is my secret obsession. I find books are lovely to hold as well as read.

I was thinking about crying which you and Dools have both mentioned. It really is a release to cry at times because of all the pent up emotion we experience from everywhere. I also believe that having a mental illness puts us in the vulnerable group for tears. Our emotions are so close to the surface most of the time that it takes very little to trigger a response we would love to keep private. Well, it's better than becoming angry as Dools said. I know I can become angry when it would be better to cry, certainly less destructive.

I had a visit last week from someone who is my support person. She was with me for about two hours and I think I cried for at least for at least an hour. I think it surprised me as much as it surprised my visitor. But I was in a bad place for a few days and in reality her visit was serendipitous (I love that word). It brought home to me how it is our resilience that needs to be worked on. And also how hard it is to increase our resilience. As John Denver used to sing, "Some days are diamonds, some days are stone".

I hope you are feeling well.

Mary

Sensitivity

Booklover17 — Fri, 12 Oct 2018 04:54:42 GMT

Hi Mary,

Thank you for your post. I was thinking I should join a book club. How is it? Books are lovely to hold, very true 🙂 I have been crying a lot lately but I am going through a hard time as well as being anxious so I have accepted it. I am glad you have a support person, sometimes it is just good to have someone there. My friends have been really great.

I am not feeling great now but hope it improves. I hope you are well.