topic Feeling scared in Anxiety

Feeling scared

Feeling_lowsy — Sun, 29 Jul 2018 05:53:19 GMT

Hi All,

Doing everything I’m meant to be doing to deal with the anxiety and depression yet still feel scared almost all of the time. Even logging into this forum as a first time user is challenging my emotions. Please be kind on your reply.

Feeling scared

Feeling_lowsy — Sun, 29 Jul 2018 06:34:30 GMT

It’s Sunday night, everyone is getting ready for work tomorrow. Getting their routines together, getting ready to be productive and I’m getting more upset. I’m off work because of the black dog feeling hopeless, useless and a poor role model for my kids who head off to school each day whilst I’m at home. Why do others do on these circumstances? Any thoughts would be appreciated.

Feeling scared

Croix — Sun, 29 Jul 2018 06:49:28 GMT

Dear Feeling Lowsy~

Coming here to the Forum and composing your first post can seem a very big step, and takes a fair bit of courage, as does setting out how you feel for others to see. It will be fine, as the ones here who read your message are like me, they have been there too.

Seeing the world get ready for work while unable to do so is a pretty isolating and upsetting thing. It quickly leads on to feelings of letting people down and inadequacy. Those feelings are not true though. When I improved I came to see it was the depression altering my thoughts and the facts were very different. Being ill is just that, something beyond one's control.

I only ever started to improve when I had help. Now I'm pretty good. So can I ask you if you are seeing a doctor and under treatment? If so I'd suggest going back and saying things are not working. Of course if you have not yet seen one then now is exactly the right time to start.

I was lucky in that I had a partner who was very supportive, loved and cared for me. It was hard on her but she made a huge difference, even my just knowing she was here. Do you have anyone like that?

Kids are pretty flexible provided there is love in their lives, and if there are things you cannot do now I'm sure there will be a time when you can.

Thank you for trusting us with your story, we'd really like it if you said more about yourself and your life

Croix

Feeling scared

Feeling_lowsy — Sun, 29 Jul 2018 08:23:29 GMT

Thanks Croix,

Yes I have the support of both my GP and psychologist and a great network of friends and family including my most magnificent wife.

They all help and I have no doubt that without them I would be far worse. Yet even with their help, the black cloud still envelopes me when I least expect it. One minute all is good, and then without notice I find myself crying on my bed with no explanation as to why. It’s scary, disconcerting and quite unpredictable.

Maybe I should revisit my health care professionals and discuss this to see if there are other strategies to tap into. Good advice - thanks and thanks for sharing your experiences with me.

Feeling scared

Croix — Sun, 29 Jul 2018 09:19:17 GMT

Dear Feeling lowsy~

Yes it can come one quickly and at the time there does not seem to be a reason one can point to. Someone once told me it was depression and anxiety being like a very full cup, and it took practically nothing to make it spill over.

I have had a number of strategies sitting there waiting for such times, none have been 100% effective but at least are something, which not only helps at the time but also makes me a little less afraid, as I know they are there.

One of the most effective - for me - is something that involves physical moment. Even when feeling lousy going outside and a walk around the house or somewhere like that does tend to distract the mind a little. There is a free smartphone app called Smiling Mind which with practice does break the chain of thoughts.

Have a look at :

Forums / Anxiety / SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING ANXIETY

Which even though for anxiety has a lot of good stuff in it.

Doing things you enjoy is most important, even if you find it hard to remember any. It gives your mind a rest, and something to look forward to each day. It does not have to be a big thing. Talking with a partner, reading a book, a pet, whatever suits you. It is not being selfish, it is medicine for the soul.

Croix

Feeling scared

Feeling_lowsy — Sun, 29 Jul 2018 09:46:48 GMT

Thank you 👍🏼

Feeling scared

Feeling_lowsy — Mon, 30 Jul 2018 09:22:35 GMT

Hi Croix,

I went back to the the psychologist today. Had a great chat, discussed some more strategies and kept myself occupied with some meaningful work. Feeling much better today because of it.

Thanks for spurring me on. One day done, let’s hope tomorrow is a good day.

Feeling scared

Croix — Mon, 30 Jul 2018 09:43:29 GMT

Dear Feeling lowsy~

👍

I'm really pleased for you, it's amazing what a difference a sensible health professional can make.

-C

Feeling scared

Feeling_lowsy — Tue, 31 Jul 2018 21:59:54 GMT

Gee I find the mornings hard. I’m currently not at work on sick leave. Everyone else is getting going and I lie awake from all hours worrying and getting very upset. It just seems that every morning is ground hog day and every morning I end up battling the same demons.

My wife and kids are great, but it’s hard to put on a brave face each day when I feel anything but brave.

By about 10am when I’m into the routine of the day I feel somewhat better, but the five hours beforehand seem ever so daunting and lonely and terrifying. I do breathing exercises, I try to distract myself but nothing seems to work all the time or completely. What are the online chats through beyond blue like? Also the support over the phone? Are they people just to talk to or are they there to direct you to services?

thuoughts anyone?

Feeling scared

KittyCat23 — Wed, 01 Aug 2018 08:23:48 GMT

Like all emergency services they are time limited chats designed to refer you to regular support. Getting regular support can be hard because there are often long wait times and mental health is seriously under-funded in this country. I've been seeing a psychologist on 2 mental health plans but feel that level of support only just scratches the surface. I do understand the gripping fear though, I remember those early days very clearly and they were terrible. The good news is that my anxiety as a major manifestation is gone now, I no longer have panic attacks. But the depression seems to be with me like a faithful friend.

Feeling scared

Feeling_lowsy — Sun, 05 Aug 2018 02:38:12 GMT

Another day of waking up scared, crying and feeling hopeless. This seems to be the norm now rather than the exception. Just can’t seem to see the light at the end of the tunnel. Have a loving family supporting me but it just appears all too hard.

the feeling of hopelessness and dread, the feeling that the world is a dangerous place where people are simply waiting for me to do something wrong simply to pounce on it and find me out for doing wrong.

Id like to think that I am a caring person, I help out, I’m polite etc... yet had some others claim the opposite of me in a work environment that has led to some pretty devastating feelings of doubt and mistrust. That has spiraled into some nasty feelings of anxiety and now the low points of feeling there is only a long road of hurt and heartache ahead.

Feeling scared

Croix — Sun, 05 Aug 2018 05:15:43 GMT

Dear Feeling lowsy~

I'm sorry it's not so good at the hte moment. You did ask about on-line chats, which as KittyCat23 said tend to be limited time. This Forum of course is not real-time and you an wait a fair while for a response.

Have you considered support groups in your area? -Our 24/7 Help Line on 1300 22 4636 may know of something in your area.

Trying to et out of hte feelings of hopelessness and dread is hard, however taking small steps may be the way to go. Setting yourself small targets to do despite your feelings. Maybe learning to use Smiling Mind to change your thoughts, maybe something more physical like a short walk.

Every time you accomplish one of these you have a success on your hands, and that in itself is positive. So what sort of things do you thnk might help?

Croix

Feeling scared

Feeling_lowsy — Sat, 11 Aug 2018 01:01:48 GMT

Hi Croix,

I took your advice and called the 1300 number this morning as I started the day horribly. The health care professional on the phone was excellent. She helped me rationalise the situation and even got me motivated enough to get to the gym. Had a great workout and that combined with a professional chat has made me feel 100% better.

Thanks again for suggesting it. I’d seen it there but thought it was not for me for there must be people doing worse than me. But it was for me and I’m glad I took the plunge. Of course it doesn’t take the place of my regular psychologist but it certainly got me off to a far better day than I would have had otherwise.

So to you and those on the end of the phone line, a very big thank you. 👍🏼

Feeling scared

Croix — Sat, 11 Aug 2018 08:05:21 GMT

Dear Feeling Lowsy~

As you know everyone here, including Community Champions, have their own difficulties. Your post realy gave me a lift and made me feel pretty good, so thank you.

Like you I've found a competent human voice has made a world of difference, and the fact you are already set up wiht a gym to go to is great, exercise has it's own magic.

I hope you won't hesitate to the same extent next time, help lines are there for you just as much as anyone else.

Croix

Feeling scared

Feeling_lowsy — Sun, 09 Sep 2018 01:52:01 GMT

I find this minefield of dealing with anxiety and depression so unpredictable. Had a terrible night’s sleep which has left me dark and sad.

all week I had been going so well. Joined family to watch the footy which meant a late night, which meant an unsettled night which led to a terrible morning.

Oh the price you pay for trying to have a good time with friends and family. Now I have the black dog follow me around all day reminding me that all is not as it should be in my world. It just takes such a toll on the ones I love. It’s just not fair and seems like an eternity until my emotional world balances out let alone be back to what I would hope for.

the dark cloud is just so unshakable and relentless.

Feeling scared

Croix — Sun, 09 Sep 2018 02:24:44 GMT

Dear Feeling lowsy~

I'm sorry things went downhill, it is so wearing and can appear endless.

I've found I've had to accommodate my condition and try to steer clear on known trouble spots. While this includes obvious triggers concerning events in my past it goes further to include things like not talking to someone who always has a very negative effect and also not using email because of the delay in any response. There is a very long list.

OK so the late family night watching footy did not turn out well, does that mean you can identify a particular trigger and work around it in future? While catering for illness is a right pain it can lead to a calmer and perhaps even a little more dog-free life.

What do you think?

Croix